The secret to happy and successful marriage is “puzzling” enough on its own, but it becomes even more complicated once you decide to become an entrepreneur. Yes, it is achievable to be happily married and own a business, and many people do it, but when you are still at the beginning of that journey, it can seem impossible.
First few years of building your business are crucial. You invest everything you have in it. I don’t mean just financially, but also regarding time, attention and passion.
Where is the right place for your spouse then? Right next to your side, of course, but you cannot expect from someone to eternally wait for you while you pursue your career and give back very little.
Here is some advice on how to stay a good spouse during this challenging time:
Don’t be a broken record
When you are starting your business, it is often something that you are overly enthusiastic about. Your spouse and your kids will show some understanding for your ideas and excitement, but they are not obliged to share your interests. They might be just as enthusiastic for a first few months, but after some time, listening about the same topic over and over becomes incredibly tiring.
This might sound like a paradox, but you should find new friends that share your interests and talk to them. That doesn’t mean you should stop sharing important news with your spouse. Of course, you will share, but you just won’t talk that much about business with her/him, which means you will have much more time for other topics and actual quality time.
Don’t forget about other interests
Your job might be your passion, but it is just one among the many things that interest you. Keep your curiosity about activities and places that bring you pleasure and fun in life. Do not close the door to entertainment and leisure time even though in some moments they might feel like a waste of your energy.
It’s really simple. Enjoy a hobby or two, watch a TV show with your husband/wife, read newspapers or a book, make time for yourself and not just your business side. This will be good for your marriage because it will remind your partner that you are still the same warm, caring person that they want to connect to. Also, this will help you get rid of stress and stay sane.
Spend your breaks with your partner
Make sure to take breaks! This is a necessity, no excuses. No one can work all the time and stay healthy, preserve his/her psychological well-being and maintain relationships with other people. So, you have to take small breaks during the day, keep your weekends as free as possible and go on holidays at least once, but optimally twice a year. This is important.
Have a dinner with your family, go to social events together, turn off your phone, tablet, and laptop whenever you have the opportunity and just be with your partner. One on one. Spend time together without pressure, do something relaxing and talk, share your thoughts and concerns. Be there to listen and appreciate all of the things your spouse is doing for you.
Never underestimate his/her effort. Make sure that he/she notices how meaningful their support is.
Include your spouse in your plans
Married couples have to plan things together if they want to stay happy, and they have to think about future. When you are starting your business, you are throwing yourself in a risky situation. You need a lot of money, and no one guarantees it will pay off, no one can be confident about your success.
So, when you decide to become an entrepreneur, make sure to consult with your partner. Talk about finances. Don’t bring yourself to the point where you are jeopardizing your family budget to fund your startup. Yes, your company is your priority at this point, but in the long-run, the family should be in the first place.
Your spouse can be your voice of reason. He/she can tell you when you are rushing into something without thinking. On the other hand, this will make your partner feel important. It will give him/her a significant role in your business – you will still get to be the boss of your business, but he/she will be your trustful ally. Just make sure this doesn’t get too overwhelming for him/her, some people don’t like to deal with high amounts of responsibility.
In the end, the most important thing is not to lose hope. The majority of entrepreneurs are happily married people, and that is their strength. So, just give your best not to change who you are in the process, except for growing as a person of course, and don’t forget about your partner’s needs.
Small tokens of appreciation every day will be just enough.