

{"id":83977,"date":"2023-03-14T09:27:19","date_gmt":"2023-03-14T09:27:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=83977"},"modified":"2023-03-14T09:27:44","modified_gmt":"2023-03-14T09:27:44","slug":"how-to-prioritize-your-child-through-divorce","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/separation\/how-to-prioritize-your-child-through-divorce\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Prioritize Your Child Through Divorce"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-83982\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Shutterstock_1443257816.jpg\" alt=\"Mother touching upset daughter \" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Divorce is emotionally, and sometimes physically, hard on every party that is involved. The process tends to be especially stressful for children. In a time when they are becoming their own person, seeing their parents break up can be confusing and troubling. Your child may not know everything about what is happening.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Every child and every family is different. However, as a parent, it is crucial that you fully understand your child&rsquo;s rights to protect them throughout your divorce process.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Children%E2%80%99s-right-in-divorce\"><\/span><b>Children&rsquo;s right in divorce<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One of the most complicated yet crucial parts of divorce and child support has to do with the children. Children&rsquo;s rights vary from state to state, but for the most part deals with custody, visitation, communication, child support, and information rights.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The main goal and purpose of these laws are to ensure to prioritize their child during divorce and receive the best care they deserve.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In a study reported by <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC3804638\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The National Library of Medicine<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, experts weighed the negative and possible positive effects on children of divorce.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There is much emphasis on how parenting style is affected by the process of separation. &ldquo;Most children do not experience short- and long-term negative outcomes, and there are many factors that can reduce risk and promote resilience.&rdquo;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The three factors that affect the outcome the most are parenting style, the degree of conflict in the house, and the quality of parent-child interaction. All of these are important to keep in mind as you start adjusting to your new family dynamic.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Custody-and-visitation-rights\"><\/span><b>Custody and visitation rights&nbsp;<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-83981\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Shutterstock_1310868602.jpg\" alt=\"Divorced parents visiting child lawyer \" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Although each case is different, custody is one of the most critical aspects of a divorce involving children. Custody refers to the right to physically hold or control a person or property.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When it comes to prioritizing your child during a divorce, a person that holds custody. Therefore, takes responsibility for taking care of the child or property. There are two types of custody: legal and physical. Both of these agreements can be ruled as sole or joint custody.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>&#9679; Legal custody<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It refers to the right to make important decisions regarding health, welfare, and upbringing while prioritizing your child during divorce.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>&#9679; Physical custody<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It refers to the person that will be living and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/link.springer.com\/article\/10.1007\/s10389-021-01583-1\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">caring for the child<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. This parent is referred to as the custodian.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>&#9679; Sole custody<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When it comes to prioritizing your child during a divorce, this is an arrangement where one parent spends the majority of time with the child. However, the other parent can be granted visitation rights.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Check out these reasons why one parent could get sole custody:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/sYJvhvlGNDk\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h3><b>&#9679; Joint custody<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The child spends equal parts with both parents.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are many factors that play into a court decision process of determining the custody agreement. The child&rsquo;s best interest is always held as a priority. The child&rsquo;s age, health, and well-being are key determinants as well as the parent&rsquo;s ability to care for the child.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A past of abuse or neglect will be taken into account.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Visitation rights are also crucial to finalizing a custody agreement. As mentioned prior, even if one parent has sole custody, the other can be granted visitation rights. Visitation looks different for every family.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The time could include weekends, overnights, vacations, or just a few hours on set days. The goal of these rights is so that the child has a chance to maintain a relationship with both parents.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, it is not always black and white. The child may refuse to see one of their parents, even against a court order.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A judge will not force a child to see a parent. Although, the custodial parent is expected to do everything possible to encourage the child to follow the court-determined agreement. Trouble can start when the parents start blaming each other for not seeing their child, even if the child is refusing.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>Child support&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Child support is another crucial piece in a divorce involving children. By definition, child support refers to the sum that the noncustodial parent pays to the custodian. The sum is calculated by taking into account basic living expenses, including clothes, food, shelter, healthcare, and education.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The courts will base this decision on analyzing the specific child&rsquo;s needs, as well as both the parent&rsquo;s monthly net income and the number of children in the family.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Failure to pay child support is considered contempt of court. If child support has not been paid, the custodial parent can make a file to the court.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A civil warrant can be made for the other parent that can include consequences of fines or even jail time. It is important that the terms of a divorce are upheld, especially in hopes of keeping the peace for the child.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5-tips-to-protect-your-child-through-divorce\"><\/span><b>5 tips to protect your child through divorce&nbsp;<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-83980\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Shutterstock_1055292263.jpg\" alt=\"Sad women hug little upset girl \" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are not many court ruled rights that give children power in a divorce. This is because the decisions are expected to be made in their best interest. However, to best help protect your child, it is important that you and your ex-spouse treat them fairly.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Put your child&rsquo;s needs first<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Although it can be difficult, do not let your emotions override the well-being of your child. Putting your child first can help both parents focus on the bigger picture. One of the best ways to accomplish this is by listening to your child.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. Communicate<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your child deserves to know what is going on. Hold open and honest conversations with them so that they feel involved in the decisions. This is a life-altering event happening in their life, and the older they get, the more they will appreciate honesty.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/parenting\/ways-to-make-parent-child-communication-a-habit\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">9 Ways to Make Parent Child Communication a Habit in Your Family<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>3. Encourage a positive relationship with the other parent<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If this is applicable in your situation, allow your child to foster a relationship with their other parent. Remember that when you talk about them, you are discussing your child&rsquo;s parent, not your ex.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Consider therapy<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Part of putting your child&rsquo;s well-being first is to ensure their mental health is prioritized. Seeking professional help is a great way for your child to speak to someone who is unbiased.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/counseling\/divorce-counseling-for-kids\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Divorce Counseling for Kids: Should I Take my Kid to Therapy?<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>5. Follow court orders<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stick to the plan that was finalized. Failure to follow court orders can lead to legal consequences that can put further strain on your child.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Benefits-of-professional-help\"><\/span><b>Benefits of professional help&nbsp;<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We discussed the benefits of therapy for your child, but also for you. It is important that all members of the family have someone they can talk to. When mental health is prioritized, important decisions can be made in everyone&rsquo;s best interest.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Creating an environment in your household that cultivates open communication and a solid mental health routine will help ease these tense times. If you are looking for resources, click <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC3804638\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">here<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is also crucial that, if necessary, you hire a lawyer you trust for divorce and child custody. An experienced divorce lawyer can help you navigate these legal issues and ensure that your rights are protected. They also can act as an objective third party.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Finally, they have the negotiation skills to ensure that you are protected through the divorce.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Why-prioritizing-your-children-in-divorce-is-worth-it\"><\/span><b>Why prioritizing your children in divorce is worth it&nbsp;<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-83979\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/Shutterstock_1055292164.jpg\" alt=\"Happy family receiving cash compensation \" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As we have discussed, divorce can be a traumatic experience, not only for the parents but also the children. It is essential to prioritize the needs of the children during the divorce process to ensure that they are not affected negatively.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here are some reminders of how a divorce affects a child as you go through this process:&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>&#9679; Children are the innocent victims<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Children are the innocent victims of divorce. They did not choose to be in this situation, and they are often caught in the middle of their parents&rsquo; conflicts. It is essential to remember that their needs and feelings must be prioritized during the divorce process&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>&#9679; Emotional stability is critical&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Children thrive in a stable and secure environment. Divorce can destabilize their lives and cause emotional upheaval. Prioritizing the children&rsquo;s emotional well-being during the divorce process can help them feel more secure and stable.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>&#9679; Protecting the child-parent relationship&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The divorce process can create tension and conflict between the parents. It is important to ensure that the children&rsquo;s relationship with both parents is protected during this time. The children need to maintain healthy relationships with both parents, and this can be achieved by prioritizing their needs.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/parenting\/building-positive-parent-child-relationships\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">5 Vital Tips for Building Positive Parent-child Relationships<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>&#9679; Maintaining consistency&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Children need consistency in their lives to feel secure and stable. Prioritizing their needs during the divorce process can help maintain consistency in their lives. This can include maintaining their daily routines, attending the same school, and spending time with both parents.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>&#9679; Reducing stress &amp; trauma&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As discussed, divorce can be a stressful and traumatic experience for children. Prioritizing their needs can help reduce the stress and trauma that they experience. By ensuring that their emotional, physical, and financial needs are met, the children can adjust to changes in their lives more easily.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Takeaway\"><\/span><b>Takeaway<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In conclusion, prioritizing your child during divorce and strategically placing emphasis on the well-being of your child during divorce is critical. Children are morphing into the person they will be, and they are soaking up everything in their environment.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As difficult as it may seem, you are not alone. Professional help is always a good idea for everyone affected by the separation. Tackling issues head-on will help your family be set up for success moving forward. In the end, using these tactics help build your children a brighter and healthier future.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Divorce is emotionally, and sometimes physically, hard on every party that is involved. The process tends to be especially stressful for children. In a time when they are becoming their own person, seeing their parents break up can be confusing and troubling. Your child may not know everything about what is happening.&nbsp; Every child and every family is different. However, as a parent, it is crucial that you fully understand your child&rsquo;s rights to protect them throughout your divorce process.&nbsp; Children&rsquo;s right in divorce One of the most complicated yet crucial parts of divorce and child support has to do <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1376,"featured_media":83982,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[17],"tags":[2647],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83977"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1376"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=83977"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83977\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":83983,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83977\/revisions\/83983"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/83982"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=83977"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=83977"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=83977"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}