

{"id":7597,"date":"2016-04-11T09:36:54","date_gmt":"2016-04-11T09:36:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=7597"},"modified":"2025-01-17T15:51:26","modified_gmt":"2025-01-17T15:51:26","slug":"how-often-do-married-couples-have-sex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/how-often-do-married-couples-have-sex\/","title":{"rendered":"How Frequency of Sex Differs for Married Couples"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-72460\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/how-often-do-married-couples-have-sex-.jpg\" alt=\"Loving African American Couple Having Fun in Bedroom\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many couples <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/how-to-spice-things-up-in-the-bedroom\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">experiencing bedroom boredom<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> ask, &ldquo;<\/span><b>how often do married couples have sex?<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There is no normal regarding the frequency of sex in marriage. While some couples have lovemaking sessions every day, others have dwindled good sex lives.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you struggle with your sex life, remember that many couples face challenges, and there are ways to reconnect. Know that you can <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/3-tips-for-better-sex-in-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">improve your sex life<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Read along, and you might find a way to improve your physical intimacy.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Importance-of-sex\"><\/span><strong>Importance of sex<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A study conducted in 2017 suggests that <\/span><b>the average American in the 20s has sex <\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/link.springer.com\/article\/10.1007\/s10508-017-0953-1\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><b>80 times a year<\/b><\/a><b>, which<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> means 6 times a month and once or twice a week. It doesn&rsquo;t seem like a lot? Or does it?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Also, is the frequency the same for<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/is-sex-necessary-for-a-happy-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> sex after marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or unmarried couples? There is no absolute answer to how often married couples have sex; however, sex is an integral part of married life.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-often-do-married-couples-have-sex\"><\/span><strong>How often do married couples have sex?<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You are likely looking for a reference point to draw parallels with to determine the state of your sex life. Here are a few exciting findings on how often do married couples have sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Newsweek magazine found in its poll that married couples have sex about 68.5 times a year<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, or a little more than on average. The magazine also found out that as compared to unmarried people, <\/span><b>&nbsp;married couples have 6.9 times more sex per year<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another source suggests that married couples under 30 have sex around 112q times a year.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.playboy.com\/read\/the-2019-playboy-sex-survey\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Results from Playboy&rsquo;s 2019<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> sex survey suggest that most married couples value sex and report higher relationship satisfaction when having an exclusive sexual relationship with their spouse.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In another study by David Schnarch, Ph.D., who studied more than 20,000 couples, <\/span><b>26% of couples have sex once a week, more likely once or twice a month<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Then there was another <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/journals.sagepub.com\/doi\/10.1177\/0146167216684124\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">study<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> conducted in 2017 found a strong connection between sex, well-being, affection, and positive mood.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/link.springer.com\/article\/10.1007\/s10508-019-01493-0?error=cookies_not_supported&amp;code=4dbd2a4c-4fea-409f-809a-b00005d5ec85\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">2019 study<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> showed a connection between sexual communication and sexual satisfaction and fewer faked orgasms by women.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-often-do-married-couples-have-sex-according-to-their-age\"><\/span><strong>How often do married couples have sex, according to their age<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A study conducted by sociologists <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/soc.washington.edu\/people\/pepper-schwartz\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D.<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/soan.gmu.edu\/people\/jwitte\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">James Witte, Ph.D.<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, published in <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.aarp.org\/home-family\/sex-intimacy\/info-01-2013\/seniors-having-sex-older-couples.html\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">AARP<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, states that people older than 50 years have lesser sex than younger people.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The study was conducted on over 8,000 people, out of which 31% of people have sex a few times a week, 28% have sex a few times a month, and 8% of couples have sex only once a month. 33% of couples out of these people said that almost never have sex.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/link.springer.com\/article\/10.1007\/s10508-014-0465-1\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A study published in Archives of Sexual Behaviour<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> in 2015 states that 36% of women and 33% of men have sex twice a month in their 70s. 19% of sexually active men and 32% of sexually active women have sex twice a month in their 80s.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A psychologist and AASECT-certified sex therapist, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/drlaurenfogelmersy\/?hl=en\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lauren Fogel Mersy, PsyD<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, says that as we age, sexual desires change, and they can undoubtedly decline. People might take more time to arouse and orgasm, their desire can decrease, frequency of sex can lower as the relationship matures, he added.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While so many studies support that sex life declines with age, there is no definite number of married couples having sex. It might be common for older people to lose interest in sex, but it does not apply to everyone.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The-average-number-of-times-per-week-married-couples-make-love\"><\/span><strong>The average number of times per week married couples make love<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A survey conducted on 660 married couples in 2018 by the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/gss.norc.org\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">General Society Survey states<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that 25% of couples had sex once a week, 16% had 2-3 times a week, 5% had more than four times a week.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Out of these couples, 17% had sex once a month, 19% had 2-3 times a month. 10% of couples said they did not have sex at all in the previous year, and 7% had sex only once or twice in the year.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Is-your-sex-drive-normal-or-out-of-whack\"><\/span><strong>Is your sex drive normal or out of whack?<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Believe it or not, sex is one strong bond that helps keep couples together; besides the only reason why life exists on earth. But, Amy Levine, sex coach and founder of igniteyourpleasure.com, states that &ldquo;a<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> healthy sex drive<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is different for each person.&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Consider this<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> &ndash; Do you have a higher libido than your partner? Or are you frustrated by repeated rejections of your sexual advances?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Let&rsquo;s see <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ndash; Do you have a higher libido than your partner? Or are you frustrated by repeated rejections of your sexual advances?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If the answer to one or both the questions is yes, you must have wondered whether you have a higher sex drive than others or whether your partner lacks a lack of libido.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you have a comparatively lower sex drive, you might be surrounded by similar questions.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">All these talks about sex in marriage boil down to just two questions-<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How often do married couples have sex, typically?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is it significantly different from the number of times you have sex with your partner?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If yes is the answer to the last question, then who is the one with an excessive or deficient sex drive?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, Ian Kerner, Ph.D., always maintains that there&rsquo;s no one correct answer when confronted with how often do couples have sex.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b>Related Reading: <\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/lack-of-sex-drive-in-women\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">15 Causes of Low Sex Drive In Women And How to Deal With It<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<p><b>Watch this video to learn how to have sex frequently:<\/b><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/WbVmvJ7LZTg\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Couples-have-different-sex-drives\"><\/span><strong>Couples have different sex drives<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As you may have noticed from the significant variance of these statistics that corroborate how often married couples have sex, it&rsquo;s easy to see that there is no &ldquo;normal.&rdquo; In many studies, researchers and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">therapists<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> said it depends on the couple.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Each person&rsquo;s sex drive is different, each couple&rsquo;s marriage is different, and their daily lives are different. Since so many factors are at play, it&rsquo;s tough to know what is &ldquo;normal.&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex after marriage is dependent on a lot of variables, so it&rsquo;s better to ask questions like:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What is normal for you and your spouse?&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What would each of you like your &ldquo;normal&rdquo; to be?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If both of you are happy once a week, or once a month, it doesn&rsquo;t matter what other couples do. But if one or both of you aren&rsquo;t happy, perhaps you can negotiate a new normal.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In most couples, one person usually desires sex more, while the other is fine with a lesser level.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Also, your sex drive will not be uniform and the same always.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many factors can affect your sex drive, such as:<\/span><\/p>\n<ol><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/stress-in-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stress<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Medication<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mood<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Body image<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Major changes in life, such as childbirth, loss of a loved one, or moving away<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There is practically no reason for you to get freaked out if your sex drive is dipping down for a while. There is probably a reasonable explanation for this.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s how you handle it which will make the difference.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-much-sex-is-needed-to-be-happy\"><\/span><strong>How much sex is needed to be happy?<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Sex is not only the basis of life, it is the reason for life.&rdquo; &mdash; Norman Lindsay<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How often should a married couple make love to avoid or overcome relationship detachment, infidelity, and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/resentment-in-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">resentment in marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Happiness can be easily related to healthy sex life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While it may seem that the more sex, the better it is, and there was a point where happiness leveled off. The study was published by the Society for Personality and Social Psychology and surveyed 30,000 couples in the U.S. for 40 years.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So how much sex in marriage should you have to level off with happiness?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once a week, according to researchers. In general, more marriage sex does help increase happiness, but daily isn&rsquo;t necessary. Anything above once a week didn&rsquo;t show a significant rise in happiness.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Of course, don&rsquo;t let that be an excuse not to have more sex; perhaps you and your spouse love doing it more or less often. The important thing is to communicate and figure out what works for you both.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex can be a great stress reliever, and it can bring you closer as a couple.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Guess what? There is a proper scientific explanation behind the above statement. Sex increases oxytocin, the so-called love hormone, which helps us bond and build trust.<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: right;\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Oxytocin allows us to feel the urge to nurture and to bond. Higher oxytocin has also been linked with a feeling of generosity.&rdquo; &ndash;Patti Britton, PhD<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So if you both want more, then go for it!<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b>Related Reading:<\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/healthy-sex-life\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Secret for a Healthy Sex Life? Cultivate Desire<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Low-libido-and-other-common-reasons-for-a-sexless-marriage\"><\/span><strong>Low libido and other common reasons for a sexless marriage<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What if sex isn&rsquo;t even on your mind? As much as there are <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.nbcnews.com\/better\/health\/how-often-do-happiest-couples-have-sex-it-s-less-ncna828491\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">statistics<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that substantiate the average number of times per week married couples make love, there is also a segment of couples who are in a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/reasons-for-sexless-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexless marriage.&nbsp;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Unfortunately, many people and sometimes even both people in the marriage either have no sex drive or something else is inhibiting them.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>According to <\/b><b><i>Newsweek <\/i><\/b><b>magazine, 15-20 percent of couples are in a &ldquo;sexless&rdquo; marriage<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, equating to having sex less than 10 times per year.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Other polls show that about 2 percent of couples have zero sex. Of course, the reasons weren&rsquo;t always stated&mdash;this could be due to a number of factors, of which low libido is just one.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A low sex drive can happen to both genders, though women can usually report it more.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>According to <\/b><b><i>USA Today<\/i><\/b><b>, 20 to 30 percent of men have little or no sex drive, and 30 to 50 percent of women say they have little or no sex drive<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Researchers say that the more sex you have, the more you feel like doing it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex drive is an exciting thing. The average number of times per week married couples make a person&rsquo;s libido level hugely determines love.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It seems some people are born with high or low libido, but many other factors can contribute to it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How well your relationship is going can be a factor. Still, past sexual abuse, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/counseling\/diffusing-relationship-conflicts-in-3-steps\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relationship conflict<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, infidelity, withholding of sex, and boredom can be other factors contributing to unhealthy sex life.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-to-enhance-sexual-satisfaction-in-married-life\"><\/span><strong>How to enhance sexual satisfaction in married life<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you wonder how much sex other people have, it could be because you aren&rsquo;t where you want to be sex-wise in your marriage. It happens. We all go through ups and downs. Times of stress, like moving, a new baby, or illness, can all temporarily get in the way.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Also, couples tend to experience a steady decline in sex urge post-marriage than what they enjoyed before saying &lsquo;I do.&rsquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A survey conducted by <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.cosmopolitan.com\/sex-love\/a10295440\/survey-twentysomething-married-women-sex-lives\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cosmopolitan.com<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> revealed the drop in the frequency of sex is ubiquitous, irrespective of the age of spouses and duration of the marriage.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But if you and your partner have been on the downside for a while, and there doesn&rsquo;t seem to be any significant reason, then talking to a sex therapist is a good option.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A good <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/therapy\/seeing-a-therapist\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">marriage therapist<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> can help you both get to the root of why sex is an issue and offer help to bring you together again.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Beyond <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/therapy\/sex-therapy\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sex therapy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, there are many great books about sex and marriage you and your spouse could read together to get ideas.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Also, if you are both onboard and want to reconnect, why not plan a weekend getaway to jump-start things?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"7-tips-for-keeping-your-sex-life-healthy\"><\/span><strong>7 tips for keeping your sex life healthy<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Looking for more tips to reignite the passion in your married sex life? Here are some that might help you:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>Consider the quality vs. quantity sex<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/make-your-partner-sexually-satisfied\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sexual satisfaction in marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> comes from the quality and frequency at which the couples are having sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One thing to consider is the quality vs. quantity of sex you and your spouse have.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This understanding will help you overcome the challenges related to marriage and sex, as now, just increasing the quantity will not be the focal point of your sexual life.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Remember to measure the health of your married sex life by quality, not quantity. Here&rsquo;s what quality of sex includes:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Discussing sexual positions<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that would bring gratification to both the partners<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Talking about your<\/span><b> sexual needs<\/b><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Engaging in <\/span><b>oral sex<\/b><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Stimulation<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> of genitals<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Kissing<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and caressing<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Experimenting with factoring in your <\/span><b>partner&rsquo;s preferences<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul><ol><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/sex-scheduling-is-not-a-dirty-word\/\"><b>Scheduling sex can save your marriage<\/b><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ol><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If both of you love sex when you have it, then great!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many researchers suggest scheduling it in. It seems robotic, but once you get started, it&rsquo;s anything but robotic and becomes instrumental in boosting satisfaction in married sex life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Scheduling sex means it becomes a higher priority.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Scheduling sex is not unheard of. Newlywed couples often plan their sex before actually indulging in the act. Megan Fleming, Ph.D., and a New York City-based sex and relationship therapist encourage couples to schedule their intimate moments together.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, the only problem with scheduling sex, as stated by Fleming, is &ldquo;you don&rsquo;t know how you&rsquo;ll both feel at that time, and we can&rsquo;t command ourselves to feel aroused,&rdquo; but you can &ldquo;create conditions that make sex more likely to happen.&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. Stop negative feelings in a marriage<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your quality of sex is low, that could be why the quantity is low as well. In a marriage, sex is the tie that binds.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you experience a dip in your sexual desire, analyze whether that is due to negative feelings about your marriage, spouse, or yourself.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/avoid-negativity-in-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">negative perspective on marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> can spell a death knell for married sex life.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Practicing positive affirmations about your partner, stopping unfair comparisons, releasing negative emotions by communicating openly and self-belief can help you stay positive in your marriage.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Whatever you discover about marriage, make sure you spend time doing something constructive about it, so you can enjoy the relationship benefits of having sex more often.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. Look and feel attractive at home<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There is no rule book on when and where to feel sexy, and you don&rsquo;t need to be particularly good-looking, either. However, it is common to slip into a comfort zone in marriage and stop feeling or making an effort to look and feel sexy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Loosen your hinges and slip into your inner sexiness by first focusing on what you like best about yourself. Channelize your energy into all the positive and favorite bits about yourself.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/steps-to-practice-self-love\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Practice self-love<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and self-care every day.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Get yourself a new haircut, overhaul your wardrobe, buy new make-up&mdash;do anything to kick start the routine, and get that extra dose of confidence. Change things up a bit and get noticed by your partner,<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Preserve the mystery<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As much as it sounds counter-intuitive, don&rsquo;t reveal everything about yourself to your partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/surprise-your-special-someone\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Surprise<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> them by revealing your different facets, gradually. Similarly, you don&rsquo;t need to know everything going on in your partner&rsquo;s mind. Allow yourself to be surprised, wooed by different shades of their personality, fantasies, and desires.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>5. Bring sexy back into your relationship<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To shake up the things between the sheets, resume dating.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The anticipation of a date will trigger excitement between the two of you. While on a date, engage in kissing. <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/is-kissing-important\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Kissing<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is a great way to show that you desire your partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Caressing your partner&rsquo;s cheeks and back or holding their hands while kissing can heat things for the two of you!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Nurture each other&rsquo;s sexual sides by engaging in intimate conversations, where you learn about your partner&rsquo;s love languages.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>6. Stop playing the no-sex blame game with your spouse<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stop the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-stop-the-blame-game-in-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">blame game<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and take accountability for making things better. Also, remember that a good marriage therapist can also help you figure out how to improve things on all accounts, including thriving married sex life.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-married-sex-and-satisfaction-are-related\"><\/span><strong>How married sex and satisfaction are related<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It might be hard for you to know exactly how often should a married couple make love but, it is a no-brainer that emotional connection can make your married sexual life more satisfactory.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In fact,<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.prnewswire.com\/news-releases\/best-sex-comes-with-strings-attached-new-durex-survey-reveals-201237671.html\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> a survey conducted by the famous condom company Durex<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> in 2013 found that 96% of people agreed that the better the emotional connection, the better the sexual experience.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">92% of people stated that they get turned on when their partner is vulnerable, and 90% believed that chances of better sex are higher if they have been together for a more extended period with their partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex is directly related to the emotional connection and respect in the relationship. A good relationship with no stress can boost your sex life and positively affect your married life.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>Conclusion<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many statistics on married sex life out there seem to tell us what is a &ldquo;normal&rdquo; amount of sex for married couples or educate us on an average number of times per week married couples make love.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In all reality, there is no set definition of normal. However, keep in mind that marriage and sex are not mutually exclusive to relationship bliss.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Each couple is different, so it&rsquo;s up to you to determine what is normal for you!<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Many couples experiencing bedroom boredom ask, &ldquo;how often do married couples have sex?&rdquo; There is no normal regarding the frequency of sex in marriage. While some couples have lovemaking sessions every day, others have dwindled good sex lives.&nbsp; If you struggle with your sex life, remember that many couples face challenges, and there are ways to reconnect. Know that you can improve your sex life. Read along, and you might find a way to improve your physical intimacy.&nbsp; Importance of sex A study conducted in 2017 suggests that the average American in the 20s has sex 80 times a year, <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":675,"featured_media":72460,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[31],"tags":[2526],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7597"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/675"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7597"}],"version-history":[{"count":57,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7597\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":106938,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7597\/revisions\/106938"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/72460"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7597"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7597"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7597"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}