{"id":72442,"date":"2021-12-13T07:52:11","date_gmt":"2021-12-13T07:52:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=72442"},"modified":"2023-11-17T12:50:04","modified_gmt":"2023-11-17T12:50:04","slug":"what-to-do-when-the-relationship-spark-is-gone","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/what-to-do-when-the-relationship-spark-is-gone\/","title":{"rendered":"What to Do When It Feels Like the Spark Is Gone"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-72445\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/what-to-do-when-it-feels-like-the-spark-is-gone.jpg\" alt=\"Portrait of couple sitting on opposite sides of the wall and feeling sad\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You don&rsquo;t feel the same passion in your relationship anymore. It doesn&rsquo;t excite you, and you don&rsquo;t feel wild like you used to. The magic is gone. Simply put, there is no spark left in your relationship. Now the question comes, what to do when the spark is gone?<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What-is-the-spark\"><\/span>What is the spark?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Remember how you get butterflies in your stomach when you talk to someone you like and how you feel when you are with them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The magical show you witness when you&rsquo;re in love. Well, that&rsquo;s the birdie we call spark, those butterflies, that wildness, and that pretty magic.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Keep reading to know how to get the spark back in a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/signs-of-a-broken-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">broken relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/tips-to-reignite-the-romantic-spark-in-your-relationship\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Tips to Reignite the Romantic Spark in your Relationship<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What-makes-the-spark-disappear\"><\/span>What makes the spark disappear?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Now you know what spark is, and if there is the spark in your relationship, or you&rsquo;re pretty sure that it&rsquo;s gone. But the question is, what makes it disappear?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There can be a lot of reasons for lost connection in a relationship. Some of them are listed below:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You two are taking each other for granted.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/281030459_Spending_Time_with_One's_Beloved_Ones_The_Interplay_Between_Dimensions_of_Shared_Time_External_Stress_and_Couples'_Relationship_Functioning\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You and your partner are spending less time with each other.&nbsp;<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You have shuffled your priority list, and now your partner is out of it.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Less or no communication about your feelings with your better half.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You don&rsquo;t feel attracted to them like you used to.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Reasons-your-relationship-has-lost-its-spark\"><\/span>Reasons your relationship has lost its spark<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many relationships go through tough times and revive, but some things can hurt your relationship and turn it into a passionless relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here are a few reasons that might be the reason why there is no spark in your relationship now:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">True love and intimacy are about being honest. If you are not entirely yourself with your partner, you will hold things back from your partner. Dishonesty can leave a noticeable scar on trust and can wound your relationship.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you do not have enough action in the bedroom, you might lose that spark sooner than you estimated. You need to keep things hot there.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You are not spending enough time with your partner. You are not making any valuable or happy memories with them.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You have accepted your relationship as it is, and you have stopped trying to do anything new for a breath of fresh air.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/the-ins-and-outs-of-a-passionless-relationship\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Ins and Outs of a Passionless Relationship<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<p>Watch this video to know more tips about keeping your relationship healthy:<br><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/gh5VhaicC6g\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Signs-that-the-spark-is-gone\"><\/span>Signs that the spark is gone<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are pretty high chances that you&rsquo;re not even sure if you have lost the spark in the relationship or it&rsquo;s just you overthinking everything. So to help you out, here are some <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/love\/signs-youre-not-in-love-anymore\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">signs of not being in love<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> anymore:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You two lovebirds don&rsquo;t go on dates anymore. Yes, dates do matter.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You two don&rsquo;t hold each other&rsquo;s hands. Those gentle and sweet touches have gone &lsquo;poof.&rsquo;&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You criticize each other on every little thing.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your sex life is wilting like it&rsquo;s winter out there.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You don&rsquo;t make an effort to make each other happy.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You&rsquo;d instead appreciate the idea of having fun with your friends rather than your partner.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Now that you have read the above signs, below is what to do when the spark is gone.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-revitalize-a-relationship\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to Revitalize a Relationship- 10 Tips<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"10-Things-to-do-when-the-spark-is-gone\"><\/span>10 Things to do when the spark is gone<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-72446\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/things-to-do-when-the-spark-is-gone.jpg\" alt=\"Lazy Millennial Couple Getting Bored at Home Sitting on Sofa\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You want that passion back. You want to reignite the spark in your relationship. So here are some tips on what to do when the spark is gone.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Don&rsquo;t blame yourself<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you want to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/love\/fall-back-in-love\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">get back in love with your partner<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, you have to quit overthinking and blaming yourself.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Was it me? Did I do something? Or maybe I didn&rsquo;t do enough!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s widespread that you&rsquo;ll feel this way. But it&rsquo;s nobody&rsquo;s fault. Rekindling love takes time, patience and focus on improving things.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. Accept the truth about your relationship<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">No relationship is always rainbows and unicorns. Like us, relationships too grow with time.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You have to accept that it&rsquo;s not always going to be the first lovey-dovey month of your relationship. Your relationship is growing, and so should you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead of thinking about how to get the spark back and do things as you did in the past, do something new to ignite the love flame.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. Try to understand your feelings<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Before you go running to your partner with a heavy head, you should understand yourself first. Listen to your heart.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Draw a clear picture of your feelings, and then discussing it with your partner will be a lot easier.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Now it&rsquo;s time for you two to have a conversation<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Every healthy relationship needs a constant and open chit-chat. Remember the picture you drew above. Now is the time when you share it with your partner. Tell them what&rsquo;s on your mind.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Don&rsquo;t try to complain, instead put it in a concerned way. But don&rsquo;t forget that your partner is also a part of this relationship. They, too, will have a picture to share.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/conversations-every-couple-needs-for-a-better-marriage\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">10 Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have for a Better Marriage<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>5. Take a break<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Go on a vacation. There&rsquo;s nothing like a carefree and fun vacation. Utilize that time by understanding and loving each other.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Being alone away on holiday will give you some space to focus on each other and talk your hearts out. It can bring back the spark.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>6. Reignite the bedroom<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Try something new in bed. Try to ignite new flames. Everyone loves it <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/5407182_Maintaining_Sexual_Desire_in_Intimate_Relationships_The_Importance_of_Approach_Goals\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">when it gets a little spicy.<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you can get it back in the bedroom, it&rsquo;s a good start.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>7. Spend some time&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Share some quality time while indulging in some common hobbies or activities. Take bike rides, visit an old friend, or take out old pictures over drinks and there will be lots of good things to share.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, you feel comfortable, keep an honest conversation between you now and then.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/ways-to-have-a-quality-time-with-your-partner\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">11 Ways to Have Quality Time With Your Partner<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>8. Show gratitude<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-72447\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/show-gratitude.jpg\" alt=\"Couple Embracing and Looking at Each Other While They Are Lying in Bed\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/43348261_Benefits_of_Expressing_Gratitude_Expressing_Gratitude_to_a_Partner_Changes_One's_View_of_the_Relationship\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Appreciate each other&rsquo;s presence.<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Sometimes all that your partner wants to hear is &lsquo;I Love You.&rsquo; These three words are magical.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>9. Clean up for your partner<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Go on a movie date or a dinner date. Surprise them with little gifts.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you don&rsquo;t usually do it, then dress up for them. These little things are more than little. They make a notable impact, which could be good for your relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>10. Don&rsquo;t set false expectations<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">More importantly, always remember that not every day will be magical. Somedays, you will feel tired, or your partner will feel down. And that&rsquo;s the time when they&rsquo;ll want you to understand them and support them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Relationships are dynamic. They&rsquo;ll need your continuous attention and effort. Don&rsquo;t let the movie world tell you otherwise.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-bring-passion-back-into-a-relationship\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">20 Ways to Restore the Passion in the Relationship<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>Conclusion<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once you know the problem, it&rsquo;s time to work upon it. Decide together a way to solve it. So stop thinking about what to do when the spark is gone. Get working on your relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You don&rsquo;t feel the same passion in your relationship anymore. It doesn&rsquo;t excite you, and you don&rsquo;t feel wild like you used to. The magic is gone. Simply put, there is no spark left in your relationship. Now the question comes, what to do when the spark is gone? What is the spark? Remember how you get butterflies in your stomach when you talk to someone you like and how you feel when you are with them. The magical show you witness when you&rsquo;re in love. Well, that&rsquo;s the birdie we call spark, those butterflies, that wildness, and that pretty <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1320,"featured_media":72445,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[24],"tags":[2529],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/72442"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1320"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=72442"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/72442\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":91333,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/72442\/revisions\/91333"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/72445"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=72442"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=72442"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=72442"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}