

{"id":71032,"date":"2021-10-28T11:25:31","date_gmt":"2021-10-28T11:25:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=71032"},"modified":"2024-11-03T15:44:22","modified_gmt":"2024-11-03T15:44:22","slug":"things-you-should-never-do-in-a-relationship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/things-you-should-never-do-in-a-relationship\/","title":{"rendered":"25 Things You Should Never Do in a Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-71035\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/things-you-should-never-do-in-a-relationship.jpg\" alt=\"Warm Toned Portrait of Modern Young Couple Talking to Each Other Sincerely While Sitting on Floor in Cozy Home Interior\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Healthy partnerships are a blend of many things, most of which include love and best friendship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That means happiness extends to bliss on the most outstanding of days, unending support for each other, and having a teammate to get through the hectic day-to-day. It can be amazing.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can also be awful at times. Most of us are aware of things not to do in a relationship, but when one person is facing challenges or the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/marriage-fitness\/ways-to-get-through-a-rough-patch-in-your-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relationship is going through a rough patch<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, unhealthy habits begin to form that need to be squashed before they become the norm.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2>25 things to never do in a relationship<\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When relationships are good, they can be fantastic, but when things are sour, partners begin to do things you should never do with your mate. It&rsquo;s quite normal to occasionally lash out if you&rsquo;re angry or perhaps even inadvertently insult your mate.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But when bad behavior starts to be a habit, it needs addressing before one or both partners begin to feel it&rsquo;s okay to act this way. Let&rsquo;s look at things not to do in a relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Believe that it&rsquo;s &ldquo;a walk in the park&rdquo;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">No one should presume what should a relationship be like. Partnerships are not all created equally, nor are any walks in the park. Being with someone you love, consider your best friend, comes with ups and downs if you intend a long-term match.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Each day you need to nurture plus try to cope with the downs in a healthy, communicative way.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/9-ways-to-manage-the-ups-and-downs-in-your-relationship\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">9 Ways to Manage the Ups and Downs in Your Relationship<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>2. Don&rsquo;t try to push for the next step<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead of enjoying each moment as they happen, some partners anxiously push for that next step in the relationship. One of the worst things to do in a relationship is to rush rather than <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/ways-to-create-memories-with-your-partner\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">create fabulous memories<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> as you go from one day to the next.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The moments leading up to whatever the future holds are part of your story; they should be as fascinating as the climax.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. Support doesn&rsquo;t mean being the solution<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The ideal mate enhances their partner&rsquo;s life and encourages them to grow and vice versa. That doesn&rsquo;t mean you&rsquo;ll have the answer to every situation that arises. While a mate should always listen and support, that doesn&rsquo;t translate to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/solutions-for-8-common-relationship-issues\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">fixing the problem<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or providing a solution.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Each partner needs to recognize the strength within themselves to manage and cope with life&rsquo;s issues and not have that expectation that your significant other will always take care of everything for you. Support and encourage, but don&rsquo;t always try to be the answer.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Also Try : <\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/who-is-my-ideal-partner-quiz\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Who Is My Ideal Partner Quiz<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Rough times need addressing, not ignored<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-71036\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/rough-times-need-addressing-not-ignored.jpg\" alt=\"Spouses Sit Separate on Sofa at Home Ignore Each Other Avoid Talking After Arguing\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Healthy relationships face challenges. It would be unusual to be involved in a long-term committed partnership and not have ups and downs. The test of strength is how <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/9-ways-to-manage-the-ups-and-downs-in-your-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">both people work together to cope with the downs<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s not easy, nor is it supposed to be. It requires plenty of effort. If one person chooses to ignore it with the notion it will work itself out is not worth your effort. That&rsquo;s not how a relationship should be.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/overcome-difficult-times-in-your-relationship\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">6 Tips to Overcome Difficult Times in Your Relationship<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>5. Allow fear to take control<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When things begin to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/serious-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">get serious in a partnership<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, it can be scary. You will allow someone your vulnerabilities, give your trust, face expectations, and be depended on. It can be overwhelming.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you let that fear take over, it can ruin what might be a good relationship. It&rsquo;s essential to work through these feelings with your mate by communicating what you&rsquo;re experiencing and why.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/mental-health\/controlling-wife\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">8 Signs That You&rsquo;re Married to a Controlling Wife and Ways to Deal With One<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>6. Secrets have no place in a healthy union<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/keeping-secrets-can-destroy-a-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Keeping secrets<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is not something mates do who enjoy a strong, open, honest union. Attempting to keep something quiet from a partner puts a wedge between the two of you that will ultimately let your significant other know something is up.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s better to get everything out in the open in the very beginning and let the other person determine if it&rsquo;s such a bad thing instead of trying to hide it. Secrets always come out at some point. It&rsquo;s better to hear it in an honest conversation.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/signs-your-spouse-is-hiding-something-from-you\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">15 Signs Your Spouse Is Hiding Something From You<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>7. Fake is unfair to both of you<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you&rsquo;re trying to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-develop-authentic-relationships\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">develop a relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> with another person, you need to be authentic. Things you should never say to a guy or things you shouldn&rsquo;t say to your girlfriend include only agreeable comments or precisely what they want to hear.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you nod along with everything a partner says, in essence faking the way you feel, you&rsquo;re being dishonest with them and unfair. Your mate isn&rsquo;t getting to know you but instead a fairy tale version. You owe it to yourself and your partner to be real.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/fake-relationship\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">20 Signs You&rsquo;re in a &ldquo;Fake Relationship\"<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>8. Validation from outside sources<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When a mate feels the need to seek other people, perhaps friends or even family, to validate you for them, it might not be the ideal relationship you believe it to be.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When pondering <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/7-characteristics-of-a-good-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">what is a good relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> supposed to be, they require a genuine love and contentment that doesn&rsquo;t involve validation of any kind except between the partners.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The need to look outside for that validation shows doubt. There&rsquo;s no place in a true partnership for that.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Also Try: <\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/what-is-your-ideal-relationship-quiz\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What Is Your Ideal Relationship Quiz<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/p>\n<h3><b>9. Grudges are unhealthy<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Disagreement, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.healthnavigator.org.nz\/healthy-living\/a\/argument-tips-for-having-a-healthy-argument\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">arguments<\/span> <\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">will happen. Sometimes these are exceptionally unpleasant to the point each person gets close to saying the things not to say to your girlfriend or vice versa, saying the things not to say to your boyfriend.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead, each person needs to walk away, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/let-there-be-some-space-in-your-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">get some space<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and take some time to work through the events so you can each find forgiveness. Everyone makes mistakes, but it&rsquo;s the bigger people who know how to forgive, move forward, and not find a reason to hold a grudge.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/signs-you-need-space-in-your-relationship\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">15 Signs You Need Space in Your Relationship<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>10. The past should stay in the past<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-71037\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/the-past-should-stay-in-the-past.jpg\" alt=\"Alone Women Sitting Alone Looking Away From the Window\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When old baggage is continually dredged up, no one can <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/dreaming-together-3-essential-tips-for-having-a-happy-future-as-a-couple\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">move towards a happy future<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. It&rsquo;s essential to make peace with whatever is serving as a sore spot in the relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Regardless of what&rsquo;s happened, it can&rsquo;t be changed despite the amount of time spent arguing or worrying over the incident. It&rsquo;s more important to focus on the present and how you can step into the future.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/stop-your-spouse-from-bringing-up-the-past\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How Do You Stop Your Spouse From Bringing Up the Past<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>11. Strength is an expectation<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Everyone has their moments of <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.relate.org.uk\/relationship-help\/help-relationships\/making-your-relationship-stronger\/how-be-vulnerable-your-partner#:~:text=It%20can%20also%20mean%20being,just%20giving%20them%20a%20hug.\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">vulnerability <\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">and times where strength is not on our side. In some cases, a mate expects a partner to be the household&rsquo;s strength, handling anything that comes along.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s asking a lot to anticipate that a person can stand up to this kind of standard. Ultimately, it can lead to extreme stress and a meltdown. Each person needs to be allowed their weaknesses, flaws, faults and be appreciated for these along with the positives.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>12. Sit in judgment of flaws<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In that same breath, some mates might ridicule or criticize even in <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/what-is-the-definition-of-a-healthy-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">healthy relationships<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> when they have personal issues, or perhaps there&rsquo;s a rough patch in the relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This habit can get out of control if an <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/open-communication-in-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">open line of communication<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is not developed as soon as the behavior starts to happen. Neither person should be judgmental or even inadvertently insulting towards the other person.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Words need to be chosen carefully<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> when facing challenges.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Being critical is one of the primary things not to do in a relationship, especially when you&rsquo;re hoping to move forward peacefully.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/the-key-to-judgment-free-communication-mirroring-validation-and-empathy\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Key to Judgment-free Communication: Mirroring, Validation and Empathy<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>13. Expectations are too high<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When learning what not to do in a relationship with your boyfriend or in that same vein what not to do in a relationship with your girlfriend, a primary focus should be on avoiding being selfish.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The idea is that you&rsquo;ll face the partnership as equals and the day-to-day as a team. There won&rsquo;t be any <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/expectations-in-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">expectations for either person<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Instead, you&rsquo;ll see whoever has the time or energy to get to a task doing it or take a day and do the chores together.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As far as the relationship is concerned, the effort, time, and energy should be mutual. There should be no expectations placed on each of you but anticipation for each day and into the future. It shouldn&rsquo;t feel like a job.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/relationship-expectations-what-should-you-do-with-these\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Relationship Expectations &ndash; What Should You Do with These<\/span><\/i><\/a><b><i>?<\/i><\/b><\/pre>\n<h3><b>14. Take you for granted<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Again, in that same breath, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/romance\/dont-take-your-spouse-for-granted-four-things-to-say\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">don&rsquo;t take each other for granted<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Show appreciation and gratitude for the other person. Cherish the fact that you have this person in your life and do your part to make them happy and vice versa.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/christiana-njoku\">Christiana Njoku<\/a>, in one of her articles, specially advises<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p>As much as you can, commend every little effort of your partner towards the relationship and never take them for granted.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Too often, people become comfortable, especially in long-term relationships, assuming the other person already knows. Hence, there&rsquo;s really no reason to have to keep repeating &ldquo;I love you&rdquo; or a need to give compliments. You couldn&rsquo;t be more wrong.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/love\/great-love-tips\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">6 Great Love Tips to Make Your Relationship Healthy and Strong<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>15. Sickness and health<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take the good and the bad equally. Not all partners can do that, with some only prepared to take the good. Your partner is not always going to be that happy-go-lucky person with whom you fell in love.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There will be moments where your mate might go through a trauma, an illness, or a dark period unusual for them and maybe frightening for you. It&rsquo;s not something you will likely know how to deal with; that&rsquo;s okay.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your partner will most probably want to have space during these difficult times but at the same time know <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/support-your-spouse-through-sickness\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">you&rsquo;re supporting them<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. It&rsquo;s wise to reach out for your own support system also to help you through this period.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And if your significant other languishes for an extended period, you&rsquo;ll want to look into professional help.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/family\/how-illness-in-family-affected-my-marriage\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How Coping With Illness in Family Affected My Marriage<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>16. Change is not for the better<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you need to fix a few things to make your mate their perfect version, that <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/signs-he-is-not-the-one\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">partner is not the right person for you<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. We all have our quirks and eccentricities. That&rsquo;s what makes us uniquely us.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The people who come into our lives are initially attracted to that individuality. If any of that changes to suit what a partner imagines you to be, you will no longer be that individual. How is that fun . . . or fair?<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/why-you-shouldnt-try-to-change-your-partner\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here&rsquo;s Why You Shouldn&rsquo;t Try to Change Your Partner<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>17. They listen, but do they hear you?<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In many relationships, listening happens, but there&rsquo;s not much hearing what the other person is communicating. That&rsquo;s because no one is genuinely paying attention to what&rsquo;s said.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/322722211_The_Power_of_Listening_Lending_an_Ear_to_the_Partner_During_Dyadic_Coping_Conversations\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Active listening<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is a learned trait that takes practice. Healthy, strong, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/keys-to-long-lasting-relationship-success\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">long-term relationships<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> are such because they take the time to engage each other in this way.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Couples look into each other&rsquo;s eyes while talking, acknowledge the dialog, and only respond once they&rsquo;ve thoroughly processed what they&rsquo;ve heard. The conversation is intentional, has direction, and makes each person feel fulfilled.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>18. Overly sensitivity can lead to dishonesty<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-71038\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/overly-sensitivity-can-lead-to-dishonesty.jpg\" alt=\"Ex Boyfriend Spying His Ex Girlfriend - Stalking,infidelity and Jealousy Concepts\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you don&rsquo;t want to hear someone&rsquo;s opinion on a topic, you genuinely shouldn&rsquo;t ask a direct question of that person. Unfortunately, that&rsquo;s the case in some partnerships, and it can lead to problems or dishonesty between the pair when one becomes overly sensitive with the subject.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s essential, no matter the subject, whether it&rsquo;s a style of dressing, a shoe size, or a political inquiry, that you <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/reasons-why-respect-is-important-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">respect and appreciate your partner<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> speaking their mind without affecting the relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If there&rsquo;s a significant problem with a mate being able to say how they feel, it might be wise to reconsider this union in favor of someone who thinks more like you.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/what-does-being-sneaky-in-a-relationship-mean\/\"><b><i>&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What Does Being Sneaky in a Relationship Mean?<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>19. They don&rsquo;t work out the miscommunication<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead of talking until a disagreement resolves, some individuals will walk away, leaving each person&rsquo;s feelings to fester. That can happen in even the healthiest of relationships when going through a rough patch. It&rsquo;s among the top things not to do in a relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you can&rsquo;t find a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/how-to-communicate-in-a-relationship-with-a-man\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">way to communicate<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> the issue between yourselves to the point of resolution, it&rsquo;s wise to reach out for professional guidance. It&rsquo;s not something that will get better by neglecting it, nor will it just merely go away.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>20. Letting other people decide your destiny<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Too often, couples listen to what other people have to say about the fate of their relationship. Friends and family can be highly vocal with their opinions about mates creating tension in partnership.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can be a slippery slope for the pair because you could either stick together stronger in defiance of the naysayers or possibly break up after letting their negativity influence your opinions. These are things not to do in a relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As long as you share a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/healthy-communication-for-couples\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">healthy line of communication as a couple<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and advise family and friends to keep their opinions to themselves, you should be able to maintain a strong union without any effects from their backlash.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/couples-therapy-techniques-to-improve-communication\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Couples Therapy Techniques To Improve Communication<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>21. Closed-mindedness could lead to missed opportunities<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Things not to do in a relationship include being closed-minded no matter how small or large the change might be to your grand scheme&mdash;this kind of lends itself to give and take in a partnership.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sometimes a mate might present with an opportunity that will throw off your <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/realistic-relationship-goals\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">couple goals<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> by perhaps a small timeframe or maybe longer. Instead of disagreeing immediately with no conversation to be had, it&rsquo;s essential to look at the pros and cons and at the very least discuss them.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>22. Comparisons are the worst<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Comparing a partner to someone else like an ex is hands down the ultimate of things not to do in a relationship. Anyone who does that is extremely breakup-worthy.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That&rsquo;s not only unfair and critical, but it speaks that you&rsquo;re not good enough. It also says there are some unresolved feelings for the people you&rsquo;re being compared to. Another thing it tells you is you deserve better.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Christiana Njoku adds here,<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Comparing your partner to others is an unwise thing to do. Not only does it mean that they are not good enough for you, but it also shows you wish they were that person you are comparing them to.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/building-confidence-in-your-marriage\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Compare No More: Building Confidence in Your Marriage<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>23. Lying; enough said<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you ask what things not to do in a relationship, one of the first <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">red flags<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> everyone will mention is lying. There are, of course, little white lies. But if a mate starts telling those initially, will they progress as the relationship develops?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If so, how far will <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/ways-to-tell-someone-is-lying-about-cheating\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">your partner go with lying<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and will cheating become a component of the habit? One thing you&rsquo;ll have trouble establishing is trust. That&rsquo;s something that&rsquo;s challenging to get back once it&rsquo;s gone.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/deal-with-a-lying-spouse\/\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to Deal With a Lying Spouse<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>24. Seeking consolation during the rough patch<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Something that can prove unforgivable is when a mate seeks out consolation during the rough patch instead of making attempts to communicate with you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In all likelihood, the interaction is innocent, especially if you have a strong bond. Still, it&rsquo;s like a virtual slap to go outside the relationship to discuss the issues instead of <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/solutions-for-8-common-relationship-issues\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">trying to resolve things at home<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>25. Refusing therapy or counseling<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When a rough patch reaches a point where there seems to be no resolution, and you want to seek professional help in an attempt to save the relationship. Still, your partner refusing can make it begin to feel hopeless.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That&rsquo;s especially true if your mate is putting forth minimal effort in working through the problems. It can be tempting to throw out an ultimatum, but you want your significant other to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">go for therapy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> because they want to, not because you force them.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ultimately it needs to be their decision, but your decision needs to be whether you want to continue to put forth the effort you&rsquo;ve been exhausting.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Check out this video that explains what one can discover about the relationship in couples therapy:<\/span><br><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/wb_cnk7Bm8k\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h3><b>Final thought<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Every couple will experience ups and downs regardless of how healthy, happy, and strong your partnership is. It&rsquo;s natural and expected in a long-term relationship. The difference between a successful couple and those who struggle is how you cope with the downs.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your partner wants you to be vulnerable, open, honest, and communicative. It means they can be too. That strengthens the bond, makes you close, and guides you directly towards a positive outcome. These are the things you <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">should <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">do in your relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Healthy partnerships are a blend of many things, most of which include love and best friendship.&nbsp; That means happiness extends to bliss on the most outstanding of days, unending support for each other, and having a teammate to get through the hectic day-to-day. It can be amazing.&nbsp; It can also be awful at times. Most of us are aware of things not to do in a relationship, but when one person is facing challenges or the relationship is going through a rough patch, unhealthy habits begin to form that need to be squashed before they become the norm. 25 things <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":675,"featured_media":71035,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[2502],"tags":[2609],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/71032"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/675"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=71032"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/71032\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":105421,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/71032\/revisions\/105421"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/71035"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=71032"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=71032"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=71032"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}