{"id":69012,"date":"2021-08-23T07:05:55","date_gmt":"2021-08-23T07:05:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=69012"},"modified":"2024-10-09T09:33:20","modified_gmt":"2024-10-09T09:33:20","slug":"how-to-deal-with-a-stubborn-partner-in-a-relationship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-deal-with-a-stubborn-partner-in-a-relationship\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Deal With a Stubborn Partner: 13 Productive Ways"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-69016\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/how-to-deal-with-a-stubborn-partner-in-a-relationship.jpg\" alt=\"Young Black and White Duo Back to Back\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Knowing how to deal with a stubborn partner in a relationship is not only challenging but emotionally exhausting.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It may seem as if your stubborn partner is never open to suggestions and refuses to change their mind, even when there is an excellent reason to do so.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This stubborn attitude can lead to real tension and frustration within the relationship, but to our relief, coping is a way. Read on to learn about ways to deal with a stubborn spouse or partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/being-stubborn-in-a-relationship\/\" title=\"10 Ways To Stop Being Stubborn In A Relationship\">10 Ways To Stop Being Stubborn In A Relationship<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"13-ways-to-deal-with-stubborn-people-in-relationships\"><\/span><b>13 ways to deal with stubborn people in relationships<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/N5VUaHd_E6M?si=DDUpXKIcI4wW1zBx\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">&#65279;<\/span><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you&rsquo;re wondering how to get someone stubborn to listen or what you can do to deal with a stubborn attitude, consider the 13 tips below<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Try to calm yourself<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you show a stubborn spouse or partner that their behavior upsets you, they&rsquo;ll probably be even more likely to be oppositional.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Practice<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/273946086_Stress_Management\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">calming strategies<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, such as counting to ten or taking a deep breath when you&rsquo;re tempted to go head-to-head with a hard-headed person.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is one of the best techniques of how to deal with a stubborn partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. Choose the right time to express yourself<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you need to discuss an important matter with a partner who tends to have a stubborn attitude, be sure to pick the right time.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If they&rsquo;ve just come home from a stressful day at work, or it&rsquo;s the end of the day, and they&rsquo;re tired and hungry, this probably isn&rsquo;t the best time to convince a stubborn person that your point of view has merit.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Pick a time when they are calm and in a relatively good mood, and they&rsquo;ll probably be more likely to see things from your perspective.<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/does-stubbornness-pay-off-in-a-relationship\/\" title=\"Does Stubbornness Pay Off in a Relationship?\">Does Stubbornness Pay Off in a Relationship?<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>3. Don&rsquo;t withhold love<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For someone who always acts stubborn in relationships, you need to show them that you care.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s normal to feel frustrated when dealing with a stubborn partner but don&rsquo;t let this lead you to withhold your love and affection. Let your partner unlearn how to be stubborn.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you&rsquo;re able to be loving, even when your partner is stubborn, they may be more likely to compromise with you.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Compliment them<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stubborn people in relationships tend to believe that their way of doing things is the best, so if you feed their ego with a compliment before making a suggestion, they may be more likely to work with you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For instance, if you&rsquo;d like to suggest a different way of managing the monthly finances, you might tell them you&rsquo;ve noticed how hard they&rsquo;re working and you&rsquo;re so impressed with how they have juggled it all.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Then, talk about how you think it might benefit them and protect their hard work if you begin a more strict monthly budget.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>5. Be empathetic toward your partner&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stubborn people can get frustrated because they may feel as if no one understands their perspective.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead of being contrary, take time to listen to your partner and<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/332607867_THE_IMPORTANCE_OF_EMPATHY_IN_RELATIONSHIP_BUILDING\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">understand their point of view.<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If they feel heard, you would know this is how to talk to a stubborn person, as some of their stubbornness will fade away, and they&rsquo;ll be more willing to listen to you.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>6. Always be willing to compromise<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One of the best tips for how to talk to a stubborn person is that you must be willing to compromise.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A stubborn spouse will probably be pretty set in their ways and convinced that their way of doing things is the best, so if you insist on something being 100% your way, you will likely fail to get your point across.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead, be willing to meet your partner in the middle, so they will feel like they are still getting to have things go somewhat according to their preferences.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>7. Listen to your partner<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Give your partner a chance to talk and defend their position, and ask that they do the same for you. Stubborn people tend to be fixated on a sense of justice, so if something seems unfair, they will not give in to you at all.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You need to know how to deal with a stubborn partner, and one of the best things you can do about it is to give your partner a chance to speak their mind.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you are on opposite sides of the fence about a matter, allow your partner a few minutes to talk to you uninterrupted to defend their position.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Next, they must allow you a chance to defend your stance without interrupting.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Allowing each person to present logical arguments on their point of view can be a viable way to arrive at a compromise.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Learn to listen better! Watch this video:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/cSohjlYQI2A?si=EaTDHMyG_89APyY_\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">&#65279;<\/span><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h3><b>8. Never suggest to your partner that they&rsquo;re wrong&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It may go without saying, but a stubborn person generally doesn&rsquo;t like to hear that they&rsquo;re wrong.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead of saying, &ldquo;You&rsquo;re thinking about this the wrong way,&rdquo; you&rsquo;d be better off saying, &ldquo;I appreciate your perspective on this, and you&rsquo;ve definitely made some good points, but there are several ways to view this, and I see it differently.&rdquo;&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>9. Don&rsquo;t be a doormat<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s easy to give in to a stubborn partner to avoid conflict, but if you always let them have their way, they will learn that they can take advantage of you and never consider your perspective.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">After all, there is no incentive for a hard-headed person to change if what they are currently doing is working for them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This means that you may have to stand your ground when you disagree with them and would be doing yourself a disservice by giving in to them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This doesn&rsquo;t mean that you will never compromise with your partner; it simply means that from time to time, you may have to put your foot down to remind them that you have a voice, too.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>10 Choose your battles wisely<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A stubborn partner will enjoy a good argument, regardless of how trivial the matter may be. This means that to keep the<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/tips-to-build-harmonious-relationship\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">harmony in your relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, you may have to choose your battles from time to time.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you really want to know how to deal with a stubborn husband, sometimes, you will just have to avoid the urge to bicker or engage with your partner when they are hard-headed.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can be easier just to smile and go along with them rather than argue your point over a seemingly meaningless matter.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Save your debates for more important topics, such as important things or matters that must be addressed.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-69017\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/always-be-willing-to-compromise.jpg\" alt=\"Unsmiling Couple Talking to Each Other in the Therapist Office\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h3><b>11. Express how important your perspective is to you<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Often, stubborn people can get so caught up in being right that they miss the bigger picture. One way to deal with a stubborn person in a relationship is to express how important something is to you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For example, if you want to spend the holidays with your parents, but they just won&rsquo;t budge, tell them that it would mean so much to you if they would be there for your grandma&rsquo;s Christmas dinner because their presence is important to you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This will help them see that this isn&rsquo;t about who is right and wrong, but instead, the point is to consider your feelings.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>12. Remember the benefits of your partner&rsquo;s stubbornness<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You must have seen negative examples of being stubborn in a relationship. Now, try to see what&rsquo;s good in it for you both.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Whether you want to admit it or not, being stubborn in a relationship has its advantages.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">After all, your stubborn partner is likely to remain committed to their goals, hopes, and dreams, even when things get tough.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This means that if the two of you have set a goal, such as saving for a dream vacation or setting aside money to buy your first house.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your partner is likely to insist upon staying on track with this goal, despite whatever obstacles may come your way.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Remembering that there is a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/303189116_When_negative_emotions_benefit_relationships\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">bright side to stubborn<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> people can help you develop a more positive view of your partner and allow you to handle them better.<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/deal-with-a-selfish-partner-in-a-relationship\/\" title=\"11 Ways to Deal With a Selfish Partner in a Relationship\">11 Ways to Deal With a Selfish Partner in a Relationship<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"FAQs\"><\/span><b>FAQs&nbsp;<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dealing with a stubborn partner is a common challenge in relationships. Understanding and addressing this behavior is crucial for a healthy connection. Let&rsquo;s explore these FAQs with relatable insights.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>Can a stubborn partner change their behavior?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Yes! People can change, but it requires <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/open-communication-in-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">open communication<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and patience. Share your feelings, express the impact of their behavior, and work together on compromises. Small steps lead to big transformations, fostering a more harmonious relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>Why is my partner so stubborn, and is it normal?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stubbornness often stems from various factors like past experiences or a desire to maintain control. It&rsquo;s normal to encounter differences, but open dialogue helps unravel the root cause. Remember, understanding each other&rsquo;s perspectives lays the foundation for a stronger bond.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>What if my partner&rsquo;s stubbornness is causing problems in our relationship?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Address the issue calmly, emphasizing how it affects the relationship. Encourage a two-way conversation to find common ground. Seek compromise and demonstrate flexibility. Remember, it&rsquo;s a team effort to overcome challenges, and addressing stubbornness together can strengthen your connection.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Taming-stubbornness-with-love\"><\/span><b>Taming stubbornness with love<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Being stubborn in a relationship isn&rsquo;t always rainbows and butterflies, but there can be positives to having a stubborn partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the other hand, a stubborn spouse can understandably be difficult to deal with from time to time. Fortunately, there are good ways how to deal with stubborn people.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-69018\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/express-how-important-your-perspective-is-to-you.jpg\" alt=\"Unhappy Couple Not Talking After an Argument in Living Room at Home\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you want to know how to talk to a stubborn person, remember to avoid telling them they&rsquo;re wrong and be sure to listen to their point of view.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A little bit of compromise and an occasional compliment thrown their way can also help you get on the same page with your stubborn partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you&rsquo;ve tried the strategies above and they just aren&rsquo;t working, or you&rsquo;ve tried to convince a stubborn person to see your perspective but still aren&rsquo;t making any progress, you might consider outside intervention.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For example, a relationship therapist can help you and your stubborn partner learn more effective ways of communicating and meeting each other&rsquo;s needs. A third party may also better convince your partner to consider your point of view.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">With some changes to your communication style and perhaps some outside intervention, you should learn how to talk to a stubborn person so your relationship can thrive.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the other hand, if you find that you cannot be yourself in the relationship and your needs are consistently not met, you may have to consider whether a relationship with a stubborn person is the best choice for you.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Knowing how to deal with a stubborn partner in a relationship is not only challenging but emotionally exhausting.&nbsp; It may seem as if your stubborn partner is never open to suggestions and refuses to change their mind, even when there is an excellent reason to do so.&nbsp; This stubborn attitude can lead to real tension and frustration within the relationship, but to our relief, coping is a way. Read on to learn about ways to deal with a stubborn spouse or partner. 13 ways to deal with stubborn people in relationships &#65279; If you&rsquo;re wondering how to get someone stubborn <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1262,"featured_media":69016,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[2502],"tags":[2604],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/69012"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1262"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=69012"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/69012\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":104911,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/69012\/revisions\/104911"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/69016"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=69012"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=69012"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=69012"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}