{"id":64749,"date":"2021-03-23T10:04:16","date_gmt":"2021-03-23T10:04:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=64749"},"modified":"2023-03-23T10:07:12","modified_gmt":"2023-03-23T10:07:12","slug":"is-jealousy-healthy-in-a-relationship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/is-jealousy-healthy-in-a-relationship\/","title":{"rendered":"Is Jealousy Healthy in a Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\"Young<\/p>\n

Jealousy in a relationship is not unheard of. In fact, it is a fairly common emotion. It can either bring the couples closer or cause them to drift apart. It is not something to criticize or chastise. Jealousy and relationships go hand in hand.<\/span><\/p>\n

So is jealousy healthy in a relationship, or is jealousy bad? <\/span><\/p>\n

Healthy jealousy in a relationship occurs when the partner handles it with maturity and communicates appropriately. However, not having a proper handle on this emotion can lead to envy, and complicate if not destroy, the relationship. <\/span><\/p>\n

Abraham Buunk, a renowned <\/span>Professor in Evolutionary Social Psychology at the University of Groningen, <\/span>stated<\/span><\/a> that jealousy is a destructive emotion. <\/span>Therefore, understanding what triggers jealousy, <\/span>what does jealousy stem from<\/span><\/a> will help you prevent this emotion from ruining your relationship. <\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>What is jealousy?<\/strong><\/span><\/h2>\n

Although jealousy in a relationship can lead to envy and a whole plethora of negative emotions, it is different from envy. With envy, you feel disdain for what has happened or is happening, but with jealousy, you’re battling with things unknown and letting your imagination <\/span>ruin your relationship<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

Then, what is jealousy?<\/span> <\/span><\/a><\/p>\n

According to <\/span>allendog.com<\/span><\/a>, psychology dictionary; <\/span><\/p>\n

“Jealousy <\/span><\/i>is a complex emotion marked by insecurity and fearing the loss of something important. It is highlighted by feelings of abandonment and anger. Jealousy is distinct from envy (although the two are often used interchangeably) in that envy is the want of something that belongs to another person.”<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

As defined above, jealousy is usually triggered when you’re about to lose something or someone important. <\/span><\/p>\n

So do not beat yourself up if you always ask the question, “why do I get jealous easily?” You are afraid of losing the person you love.<\/span><\/p>\n

However, it is essential you don’t let fear take over your thoughts and destroy your relationship. Is jealousy healthy in a relationship can only be answered by the couples. Only the couples have the power to determine <\/span>how to handle their jealous feelings<\/span><\/a>. <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not panic or fret if you feel your <\/span>personality is taking a negative turn due to jealousy<\/span><\/a>. With the right help, communicating with your partner, and understanding the reason behind it, it’s possible to turn things around.  <\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>Where does jealousy originate from?<\/span><\/h2>\n

\"Upset<\/p>\n

So, why do I get jealous easily? <\/span><\/p>\n

First, you need to know what causes jealousy. Do you struggle with <\/span>trusting your partner<\/span><\/a>? Is it a result of failed past relationships? Or from your parent’s failed marriage that led to your lack of faith in love, relationship, and family? <\/span><\/p>\n

If you ever want to get something working again, you must first find out what exactly is faulty.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Jealousy is present in every relationship, be it a romantic relationship or the relationship between a child and parent or siblings.<\/span> A child as young as six-months can show signs of jealousy if a parent starts to pay more attention to another child.<\/span><\/p>\n

So do you usually ask the question, is jealousy normal, or is jealousy healthy in a relationship? Yes, it is.<\/span><\/p>\n

What makes you take that turn of the neck to peep into your significant other’s phone? Why are you more anxious than usual when it’s late, and your partner isn’t yet home? Or are you wondering why you get jealous so easily? <\/span><\/p>\n

Finding out where does jealousy stems from can help you control it.<\/span><\/p>\n

There are two very common places where jealousy can arise from:<\/span><\/p>\n

  1. Insecurity <\/span><\/li>\n
  2. When your partner is secretive, shady, and distant. <\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>

    Several other reasons could invoke jealousy like <\/span><\/p>\n

    1. Partner being distant, <\/span><\/li>\n
    2. Weight gain<\/span><\/li>\n
    3. Joblessness <\/span><\/li>\n
    4. A more attractive neighbor, or friend at the partner’s workplace.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>

      Sometimes jealousy in a relationship can originate not from something your partner did but from insecurities. <\/span>Insecurity is an enemy<\/span><\/a> to progress; it breeds comparisons that can tear a relationship apart. <\/span><\/p>\n

      1. Selfishness is another originator of jealousy<\/span><\/a>. Your partner is permitted to show affection to close friends or even strangers. <\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>

        There are times you just want them all to yourself but remember that<\/span> individuality<\/span><\/a> in a relationship is essential. <\/span><\/p>\n

        You should trust and <\/span>respect your partner<\/span><\/a> enough to know that activities or interests you’re not a part of don’t mean something nefarious is going on.<\/span><\/p>\n

        <\/span>Is jealousy healthy in a relationship?<\/span><\/h2>\n

        To answer the question, is jealousy healthy in a relationship? Yes, a little jealousy in a relationship is healthy. So if you find yourself asking the question, is jealousy normal? <\/span><\/p>\n

        Remember that jealousy is not only normal and expected in every relationship, but there is healthy jealousy.<\/span><\/p>\n

        Note that jealousy in a relationship can also be unhealthy. If jealousy is to alert you of a threat, it is safe to know that you can misinterpret some situations. To know how to handle jealousy properly, you need to know if it’s healthy jealousy or unhealthy jealousy.<\/span><\/p>\n

        So, where does jealousy stem from, is jealousy an emotion? <\/span><\/p>\n

        Jealousy is an emotion created out of love, insecurity, <\/span>lack of trust<\/span><\/a>, or obsession. A healthy relationship filled with respect and trust will trigger healthy jealousy. There is excellent communication, firm trust, a listening heart, and a <\/span>friendly partner in a healthy relationship<\/span><\/a>. <\/span><\/p>\n

        The only jealousy that can grow out of a <\/span>healthy relationship <\/span><\/a>is a positive one.<\/span><\/p>\n

        However, jealousy based on insecurities is unhealthy jealousy. The psychology of jealousy in relationships acknowledges that we all want to be the center of attention for our partners.<\/span><\/p>\n

        So we may feel a little bit left out if such attention is focused on another person, no matter how brief. However, how you handle such a situation is what will either break or make your relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n

        <\/span>What does healthy jealousy look like?<\/span><\/h2>\n

        \"A<\/p>\n

        The triggers of jealousy are to alert you of a threat to your relationship. What causes jealousy could be your partner’s behavior or a person. <\/span><\/p>\n

        Positive jealousy in a relationship simply means you love and are scared of losing your partner. If you feel a spark of jealousy, let your partner know. This way, the action that caused such a feeling can be dealt with.<\/span><\/p>\n

        Your partner will feel loved, cherished and know the relationship means a lot to you in this kind of situation. The conversation will signify you’re in the relationship for the long haul. It will also <\/span>build trust<\/span><\/a> and help you and your partner become closer.<\/span><\/p>\n

        When you’re not getting the attention, you are used to, jealousy kicks in. But this doesn’t make you a bad person; you just need reassurance from your partner. This is where <\/span>communication steps in<\/span><\/a>. Simply explain your feelings to your partner and watch that healthy jealousy diminish.<\/span><\/p>\n

        Watch this video to help you determine if jealousy is healthy in a relationship:<\/span><\/i>