

{"id":64249,"date":"2021-03-12T10:44:11","date_gmt":"2021-03-12T10:44:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=64249"},"modified":"2023-03-22T03:34:17","modified_gmt":"2023-03-22T03:34:17","slug":"sexually-frustrated-in-relationship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/sexually-frustrated-in-relationship\/","title":{"rendered":"What to Do When You\u2019re Sexually Frustrated in a Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-64254\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/03\/what-to-do-when-you-are-sexually-frustrated-in-a-relationship.jpg\" alt=\"Unhappy Man Tired of Shouting Woman in Bedroom\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You have probably heard of the phrase sexual frustration, but you may not know <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">what is sexual frustration<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Perhaps you have even felt the sensation of <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">being sexually frustrated<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, but you didn&rsquo;t know what the cause was or how to cope with it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here, learn all about what sexual frustration means, as well as ways for coping with <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">being sexually frustrated <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">in a relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What-is-Sexual-Frustration\"><\/span>What is Sexual Frustration?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><b>Sexual frustration can generally be described as a situation when there is a disconnect between what you need or want sexually and what you are actually getting.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Being <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexually frustrated<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> can cause you to feel angry, irritated, anxious, or just downright depressed.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You might experience <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual frustration in marriage.<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> For example, when you want to have sex, and your partner does not. Or, perhaps you want to experience intense, satisfying sex all the time, but your sex life is just mediocre.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Either of these situations can cause <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual frustration in a relationship,<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> but you may feel better knowing that this feeling is actually rather normal.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another explanation for <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">what does sexual frustration mean<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is that it occurs when you simply <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/sexual-dissatisfaction-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">aren&rsquo;t satisfied with your sex life<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Maybe it seems like you and your partner just aren&rsquo;t on the same page, or you aren&rsquo;t enjoying sex anymore. Whatever the case, <\/span><b>being <\/b><b><i>sexually frustrated <\/i><\/b><b>can dampen your mood and negatively affect your relationship.<\/b><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When Is the Right Time to Start Having Sex<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-to-Recognize-Sexual-Frustration\"><\/span>How to Recognize Sexual Frustration?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><b>The first step toward <\/b><b><i>dealing with sexual frustration<\/i><\/b><b> is recognizing that it exists.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sometimes, we label stress or tension in another area of life as sexual frustration when it really isn&rsquo;t. To start with, assess how your mood has been recently. If it has been mostly negative, you may be sexually frustrated.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Next, evaluate what could be causing the negative mood. Is it problems at work, or perhaps stress over finances? If there is a nonsexual reason for tension, you probably aren&rsquo;t sexually frustrated.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the other hand, if there isn&rsquo;t another reason for your frustration, the chances are that <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual frustration effects<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> are to blame.&nbsp; Here are some <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual frustration symptoms<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that can help you to recognize this problem in your life:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your partner has rejected you the last few times you have tried to initiate sex.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You notice you and your significant other are <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/how-to-have-more-sex-in-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">having sex less often<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are things you want from your sex life that you just aren&rsquo;t able to get.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You notice that changes to your body or medications you are taking have made you<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/lack-of-sexual-desire\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> less interested in or less confident about sex<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Maybe you have been taking risks, such as having unprotected sex or hooking up with multiple partners, in order to fulfill your sexual desires.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You find that you are too tired or stressed to have sex, even though you have a desire for it.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"10-Ways-to-Deal-With-Sexual-Frustration-in-Your-Relationship\"><\/span>10 Ways to Deal With Sexual Frustration in Your Relationship<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-64255\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/03\/ways-to-deal-with-sexual-frustration-in-your-relationship.jpg\" alt=\"Couple Having A Fight In The Bed. Concept About Relationship And Problems Between Couples\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sexual frustration isn&rsquo;t a fun place to be, and it can even lead to damaging thoughts and behaviors, such as <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/mental-health\/low-self-esteem-in-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">low self-esteem<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or going outside of your relationship for sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>When you are feeling sexually frustrated to the point that it is interfering with your daily happiness or negatively affecting your relationship, it is time to take action.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you&rsquo;re feeling <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexually frustrated <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">within your relationship, the good news is that there are ways to <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">handle sexual frustration.<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Consider the following ten tips to <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">get rid of sexual frustration <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">and start feeling like yourself again:<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Have a conversation with your partner<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/start-sexual-communication\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Communication is an important<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> part of <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">dealing with sexual frustration<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> in your relationship. If you don&rsquo;t communicate with your partner, he or she may not even be aware you are sexually frustrated.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can have a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/conversation-about-sex\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">conversation with your partner<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to determine how you can better meet each other&rsquo;s needs sexually.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have an honest but <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/o.b5z.net\/i\/u\/6076626\/f\/EFFECTIVE_COMMUNICATION_IN_A_MARRIAG2.pdf\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">respectful conversation<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Begin with a statement like, &ldquo;I have noticed we haven&rsquo;t been having sex as often lately, and I miss feeling close to you. Would you be open to talking about how we can better connect sexually?&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. Go ahead and initiate sex<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Over time, people in <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/commitment-and-seeing-it-through\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">committed relationships<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> can stop putting effort into sex, which can lead to one or both of you becoming <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexually frustrated. <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Maybe your partner is also having sexual frustration but is hesitant to initiate sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead of waiting for your significant other to engage you in sex, go ahead and take that first step.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Check out this video for some great ideas on how to initiate sex:<\/span><br><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/bl0K5KnMaE8\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. Change up your sex routine<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sometimes, all you need to <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relieve sexual frustration <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">is a change of pace.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you always use the same <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sex positions<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or fall into the same routine, challenge yourselves to try something new. Talk to each other about sexual fantasies, or experiment with a new position or style of sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Try mutual masturbation<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your partner&rsquo;s sex drive isn&rsquo;t as high as yours is, or perhaps they aren&rsquo;t in the mood for full penetrative sex, you might be able to <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">release sexual frustration <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">through mutual masturbation.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This allows you to have your sexual needs met while still <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/are-you-connecting-with-your-partner-during-sex\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">connecting with your partner<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>5. Don&rsquo;t be afraid of solo masturbation<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Even if your partner doesn&rsquo;t want to join, you can engage in masturbation on your own to <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relieve sexual frustration.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<h3><b>6. Learn more about your partner<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Over the course of a relationship, two people may grow apart sexually, leading to one or both partners becoming <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexually frustrated<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Learning more about your partner&rsquo;s needs can help to resolve the issue.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Find out what turns your partner on or what they need sexually. This can help the two of you to get on the same page and become <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/the-importance-of-sexual-compatibility-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexually compatible<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> again.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Go ahead and have a conversation to see what your partner may need differently from you in order to be excited about sex again.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>7. Use music to cope<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your partner&rsquo;s <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/reasons-of-no-sex-drive-in-your-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">low sex drive<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> leads to ongoing sexual frustration, there are strategies you can use to <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">cope with sexual frustration <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">until the situation improves.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One such strategy is listening to music.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A recent <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.sclhealth.org\/blog\/2019\/04\/how-listening-to-certain-songs-can-impact-our-brain-and-affect-our-mood\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">study<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> found that listening to the music of your choice can increase feelings of joy, whereas classical music can have a relaxing effect. If you are feeling depressed over being <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexually frustrated,<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> your favorite music may help, whereas some soothing classical tunes may ease anxiety to help you <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">deal with sexual tension<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>8. Get some exercise<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-64256\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/03\/get-some-exercise.jpg\" alt=\"Strong Athletic Fit Man In T-shirt And Shorts Is Doing Forward Lunge Exercises At Home\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another way to boost your mood if you have a need to <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">get rid of sexual frustration<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is to get out and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/marriage-fitness\/working-out-with-your-partner\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">get some physical activity<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Exercise provides a great way to <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">release sexual frustration.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/link.springer.com\/article\/10.1007\/s40473-016-0089-y\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Studies<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> show that it can boost mood and improve depression. This makes exercise an ideal way of <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">how to deal with sexual frustration. <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It may not be a replacement for sex, but it can provide an outlet to help you cope.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>9. Practice self-care<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Taking care of yourself with proper nutrition, adequate sleep, and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/relationship-strategies-and-techniques-to-eliminate-stress\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">healthy stress management<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> can improve your life and help you to learn <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">how to stop being sexually frustrated.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you are always feeling stressed or tired, it can affect your ability to become turned on and enjoy sex, which can lead you to <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual frustration. <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once you <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/sustaining-self-care-practices\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">make self-care a priority<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, you are likely to find that you feel better, and sex feels better, too.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>10. Consider outside help<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If other methods are not successful at helping you <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relieve sexual frustration,<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> it may be time to seek outside help in the form of <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/therapy\/what-is-relationship-therapy-and-how-you-can-benefit-from-it\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relationship therapy.<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A therapist can help you and your partner to address underlying <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/8-common-problems-in-married-life\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relationship problems<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, such as conflict or lack of sexual compatibility, that may be negatively affecting your sex life and giving you <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual frustration.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<h3><b>Conclusion<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><b>Sexual frustration occurs when there is a disconnect between your sexual needs or wants and what you are actually experiencing sexually.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For example, you may feel <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual frustration <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;if you want to enjoy satisfying sex with your partner, but they frequently reject your sexual advances. This can leave you feeling depressed, irritated, or on edge.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If these strategies are not effective, you may benefit from going to a relationship therapist with your partner to help you to achieve a sexual connection that is satisfying for both of you.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You have probably heard of the phrase sexual frustration, but you may not know what is sexual frustration. Perhaps you have even felt the sensation of being sexually frustrated, but you didn&rsquo;t know what the cause was or how to cope with it. Here, learn all about what sexual frustration means, as well as ways for coping with being sexually frustrated in a relationship. What is Sexual Frustration? Sexual frustration can generally be described as a situation when there is a disconnect between what you need or want sexually and what you are actually getting. Being sexually frustrated can cause <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1262,"featured_media":64254,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[31],"tags":[2520],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64249"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1262"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=64249"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64249\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":64258,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64249\/revisions\/64258"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/64254"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=64249"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=64249"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=64249"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}