{"id":58803,"date":"2017-11-03T12:55:04","date_gmt":"2017-11-03T12:55:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/ways-to-support-your-spouses-career\/"},"modified":"2025-03-29T14:22:22","modified_gmt":"2025-03-29T14:22:22","slug":"ways-to-support-your-spouses-career","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/ways-to-support-your-spouses-career\/","title":{"rendered":"10 Ways to Support Your Spouse\u2019s Career"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-18677 size-full\" title=\"6 Ways to Support Your Spouse's Career\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/6-Ways-to-Support-Your-Spouses-Career-1606130196.png\" alt=\"6 Ways to Support Your Spouse's Career\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are many parts of your marriage to figure out, negotiate, and navigate. One of the most important, and often taken for granted, is your career. It is powerful to be an individual or couple who is intentional about creating a vision and setting goals for their careers.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It has been noted that ambitious people are attracted to other ambitious people. Why is that? Watch this video to know more.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/0m2buTgnwEU\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Ten-ways-to-support-your-spouse%E2%80%99s-career\"><\/span><b>Ten ways to support your spouse&rsquo;s career<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here are ten key things you can do to support one another in your careers as part of a healthy, loving marriage.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Communicate, communicate, and communicate<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A dear coaching mentor, Brandon Smith, says that in the absence of <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.frontiersin.org\/articles\/10.3389\/fpsyg.2021.767908\/full\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">communication<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, people will make it up, and when they make it up, it&rsquo;s usually not good.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So if you don&rsquo;t want your spouse making it up, you have to be willing to communicate about all matters of the heart, including your career.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What are your short and long-term career goals? If you don&rsquo;t know them yourself, work with a career coach to figure them out, and then let your partner know what they are so they can support you in having career success.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/dionne-reid\">Dionne Eleanor<\/a>, Relationship &amp; Empowerment Mentor, says<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A marriage without communication is like a business without a strategy&mdash;both will fail without clear direction.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/8-essential-tips-to-communicate-and-connect-with-your-partner\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">8 Essential Tips to Communicate and Connect with Your Partner<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>2. Know the deal breakers<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dionne further says,<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Loving someone means learning when to compromise and when to stand compassionately firm&mdash; this developed clarity is the key to long-term harmony.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You must know where to draw the proverbial line in the sand on several work-related areas. Think through these before they present themselves and potentially create a rift in your relationship. Here are some questions to ponder to help you determine your <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/13-deal-breakers-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">deal breakers<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b><i>How much travel can you live with, for yourself and your partner?&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>Does either of you have to be away for an extended period?&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>If a promotion or new job requires moving, are you willing, and can your career be compatible with that move?&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>If not, are you open to living in separate places for a time for the sake of your career goals?&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>Moving for my husband&rsquo;s career &ndash; is it a good idea? Reflect on it.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>Are you clear on how much time spent at work is too much?&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>Do you care if your spouse earns more or has better work perks?&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You must get clear on these answers as a couple!<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. Share the household tasks<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you haven&rsquo;t, make peace with the need to break <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/journals.sagepub.com\/doi\/10.1177\/2378023120924805\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">traditional gender roles<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and determine who does what best. If one is great in the kitchen and the other loves doing the lawn, be comfortable breaking the norms of who does what.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b><i>While we can have it all, it is usually the case that we can only have some at a time.&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What practices will you put in place to support the household tasks getting done without any resentment building up over that pile of dishes in the sink or the back lawn that is out of control?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Consider creating a realistic division of labor and outsourcing for help as much as needed. There is no shame in getting professional help in this area to support having a healthy marriage that honors the career demands.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Family planning<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For those with children or who would like to have children, be intentional about how you will support one another with children added to the picture. Asking the following questions is vital when supporting your spouse&rsquo;s career.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b><i>Will one or both of you take family leave or stop working together for a while?&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>If not, do your careers dictate that you hire help to deal with everything that comes with family life?<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dionne Eleanor comments,<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Magic lies in making a decision to co-create the structures &amp; habits that underpin family structure and personal development.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h3><b>5. Be nimble<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Things out of your control will surely change at work. Be flexible enough that your partnership at home can withstand handling whatever changes come. Sometimes, one of you needs to give more attention to work.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Be able to handle this and not take it personally while <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/7-ways-to-support-your-spouses-passions\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">supporting your spouse<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or your partner in handling the changes. There will be an ebb and flow for each of you in your careers and you must be nimble to support one another through the waves as they come.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-82065\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/New-Project-2022-12-29T162557.000.jpg\" alt=\"Couple having conversation\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h3><b>6. Celebrate<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Celebrate the small and BIG successes &ndash; a very expressive way to support your spouse&rsquo;s career.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b><i>Your spouse got a raise or promotion?&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>You solved a challenge at work or have figured out how to deal with that difficult boss or co-worker?&nbsp;<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Great! Celebrate! Find ways to make one another feel special and appreciated for your successes. Maybe that&rsquo;s a fun date night. It could be a thoughtful handwritten note showering praise upon your spouse.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do something that shows how they are showing up and succeeding in their career.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dionne Eleanor adds here,<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Celebrating small wins helps to build healthy relationship empires.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/relationship-milestones-that-are-worth-celebrating\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">15 Relationship Milestones That Are Worth Celebrating<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>7. Make them feel secure<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Often, a spouse becomes unsupportive of your career when they see that you are practically married to your work and they are just a secondary accessory to your life. They start to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/why-am-i-so-insecure\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">feel insecure<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and unsafe in the relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Share the joys and challenges of your career with your spouse. We often spend more time at work than anywhere else. Make sure your partner has a clear sense of what you are doing when you are apart all that time.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dionne Eleanor explains,<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Security in love comes from feeling valued&mdash;not as an afterthought, but as something of value &amp; priority.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h3><b>8. Know when to take things off their plate<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While you may divide the responsibilities of children and the household equally and fairly, sometimes, your spouse may need help to hold their end simply because work has them too occupied or they are too tired or burnt out.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In those times, you should know when you must take complete charge and let them relax for a little bit. Your partner should be able to do the same for you when the need arises.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>9. Listen<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The two of you may come from completely different professional backgrounds. What they want to talk about is not related to work, but about the people at work or how they feel at their job.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sometimes, the only thing you need to do to support your spouse&rsquo;s career is to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/322722211_The_Power_of_Listening_Lending_an_Ear_to_the_Partner_During_Dyadic_Coping_Conversations\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">listen<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to them. Offer them an ear, not a solution. They are just trying to vent, and they want to do so with someone trusted.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>10. Encourage them<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Whatever it is, be sure that you are <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/encouraging-communication-with-your-spouse\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">encouraging towards your spouse<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> whether it is going out with their colleagues to build a better bond, striving to be better at what they do, or something as simple as showing up as their best self at work.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Giving them little bursts of encouragement can feel like a lot of support from their partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-to-deal-with-your-spouse-who-doesn%E2%80%99t-support-your-career\"><\/span><b>How to deal with your spouse who doesn&rsquo;t support your career<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you have felt, &ldquo;my husband doesn&rsquo;t support my career,&rdquo; or &ldquo;my wife doesn&rsquo;t support my career,&rdquo; Here are some things you can do when your spouse does not support your career.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Be clear about what you do<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Whether or not your spouse or anyone supports your career, you must be clear about what you do and what you want to do. Setting goals and plans for your career will likely make other people confident about you as well.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. Do not try to convince someone<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your spouse does not see the value in supporting your career, you do not have to try to convince them. If you do that, your self-worth will likely take a hit when you cannot convince them.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You may start questioning your abilities and wonder if you are good enough to be supported.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/therapy\/how-to-convince-someone-to-go-to-therapy\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to Convince Someone to Go to Therapy<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>3. Prioritize your career<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You may be at a stage where prioritizing your career is important. If yes, then irrespective of the support or lack thereof, make sure you make it your number one priority. Your partner will understand when they have to.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-82040\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/New-Project-2022-12-29T153905.170.jpg\" alt=\"Sad woman hugging at home\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Do not risk everything<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Just because your partner does not support your career, it does not mean that you have to risk everything to pursue it. Weigh the risks, and take calculated ones. Only leave a job to switch to another with proper thought.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Similarly, do not go against your family but try to make them understand the value it holds for you.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading:<\/i><\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/are-open-relationships-worth-the-risk\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are Open Relationships Worth the Risk?<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>5. Seek help<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A career coach, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/counseling\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">couples counseling<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, or even both can help you navigate this journey when you are passionate about your career, but your partner won&rsquo;t support you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sometimes, taking the perspective of a professional can help you understand the situation better and act accordingly.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"FAQs\"><\/span><b>FAQs<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<h3><b>How do I support my partner during a career change?<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To support your spouse&rsquo;s career change, make sure you:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Talk to them about why they feel the need to make the switch<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Help them understand why leaving behind their current role or job is important for their growth<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Talk finances &ndash; ensure you have enough to support yourself through the rough patch that a career switch may put your family through in terms of money<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Be encouraging and supportive<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Help them find the right opportunities<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The-takeaway\"><\/span><b>The takeaway<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>At last, <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dionne Eleanor says, <\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A power couple isn&rsquo;t defined by wealth but by the strength of their unwavering support for each other&rsquo;s dreams.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Don&rsquo;t be another one of the divorce statistics! With intentionality, flexibility, and communication, you can have a healthy marriage and successful careers that allow you to be joyful people living your dreams together.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; There are many parts of your marriage to figure out, negotiate, and navigate. One of the most important, and often taken for granted, is your career. It is powerful to be an individual or couple who is intentional about creating a vision and setting goals for their careers. It has been noted that ambitious people are attracted to other ambitious people. Why is that? Watch this video to know more. Ten ways to support your spouse&rsquo;s career Here are ten key things you can do to support one another in your careers as part of a healthy, loving marriage. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1419,"featured_media":58804,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[9],"tags":[2562],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/58803"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=58803"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/58803\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":108032,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/58803\/revisions\/108032"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/58804"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=58803"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=58803"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=58803"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}