{"id":45675,"date":"2020-02-11T10:30:01","date_gmt":"2020-02-11T10:30:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=45675"},"modified":"2025-04-09T05:19:27","modified_gmt":"2025-04-09T05:19:27","slug":"how-to-talk-about-marriage-with-your-boyfriend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-talk-about-marriage-with-your-boyfriend\/","title":{"rendered":"15 Things to Talk About Marriage With Your Boyfriend"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\"How<\/p>\n

There’s just something about marriage that makes some people uncomfortable.<\/span><\/p>\n

That is true even for couples in long-term relationships. <\/span><\/p>\n

So if you are trying to figure out how to talk about marriage with your boyfriend without triggering a break-up flag, you are not alone.<\/span><\/p>\n

Love isn’t an issue, and you know your boyfriend loves you. They are loyal to you and solid as a rock.<\/span><\/p>\n

They are stable and reliable until you talk about marriage. It’s not like they are scared of commitment; they have served in the military, owned a business, completed med school, or done something else that proves they can stick to their word of honor.<\/span><\/p>\n

But when it’s a conversation about marriage, things get tense.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

What makes many stable, reliable people run for the hills when talking about marriage?<\/span><\/p>\n

The truth is, there are many reasons, and things change when you figure that out.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>How to talk about marriage with your boyfriend <\/b><\/span><\/h2>\n

If you are looking for tips when it comes to talking about marriage with your boyfriend, here are some.<\/span><\/p>\n

1. Drop hints<\/b><\/h3>\n

Sometimes, you may be on the same page, thinking about the same things but need clarification. You may want to get married, and so does your partner. Drop a hint. In that case, it may do the trick.<\/span><\/p>\n

Please talk about your friends <\/span>getting married<\/span><\/a>, or show them designs of engagement rings you like.<\/span><\/p>\n

2. Pick the right time<\/b><\/h3>\n

Whether it is just dropping a hint or sitting down to have a serious conversation with them, pick the right time. <\/span><\/p>\n

You could bring it up when you both are having a chill day out together. Bringing up the topic of marriage on a date night is also a good idea. However, please do not bring it up when they are stressed due to work or are having a bad day. In that case, it is not likely to go down well.<\/span><\/p>\n

3. Talk about personal goals<\/b><\/h3>\n

Getting married and having a family was on the list of goals for both of you, even personally. If that is the case, talking about working towards that goal together is a good way to discuss marriage with your boyfriend.<\/span><\/p>\n

Setting a timeline for it or discussing it can help you get more clarity about where you and your partner stand on it.<\/span><\/p>\n

4. Talk about relationship goals<\/b><\/h3>\n

When you first began dating, chances are you discussed where you wanted your relationship to go. Chances are also that you decided to give it a shot because you both had similar relationship goals – you wanted to get married or have a family eventually.<\/span><\/p>\n

In that case, revisiting your relationship goals and discussing them with your partner is a good way to discuss marriage with your boyfriend.<\/span><\/p>\n

5. Keep an open mind<\/b><\/h3>\n

Talking about marriage is a layered discussion. When you do it, you will realize that there are many things that you and your partner need to see eye to eye on. However, you must keep an open mind and take a holistic view of the situation. <\/span><\/p>\n

You should also understand their point of view if they need time or have something else they need to figure out.<\/span><\/p>\n

Also, watch this insightful video by Relationship Expert Susan Winter talking about communicating relationship expectations without issuing an ultimatum:<\/span><\/p>\n