

{"id":44153,"date":"2019-12-18T09:02:46","date_gmt":"2019-12-18T09:02:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=44153"},"modified":"2025-04-09T04:54:57","modified_gmt":"2025-04-09T04:54:57","slug":"is-it-time-to-talk-about-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/pre-marriage\/is-it-time-to-talk-about-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"When and How to Talk About Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66544\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/marriage.jpg\" alt=\"A happy married couple standing together\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In any serious commitment or relationship, there may come a time where you will have to talk about marriage. Marriage is a big step, but when you&rsquo;ve been together for years, you feel that you have already established a strong connection.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For some, the time may come sooner than others, and that is okay &ndash; like they say, when you know, you know. However, you may find yourself wondering, why are you not having &ldquo;the talk&rdquo; yet?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You may want to talk about it but are just not sure which one should initiate it and how to do it.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you have been wondering if this is the right time to talk about marriage, here are some pointers that can help you navigate this challenging road.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/pre-marriage\/preparing-for-marriage\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Preparing for Marriage: Let's Talk!<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Why-is-the-conversation-difficult\"><\/span><b>Why is the conversation difficult?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66545\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/couple-talking.jpg\" alt=\"White man and woman talking seriously\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lifehack.org\/826407\/talk-about-marriage\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">conversation about marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or getting married is difficult simply because it means a new level of intimacy, and that is scary. When you want to have a serious discussion with your partner, and especially when it is about marriage, there are many things you have to consider.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Irrespective of how long you and your partner have been together, this next step can come with a load of responsibilities, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/compromises-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">compromises<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and involvements of family and friends &ndash; something that worries everyone before they take the leap.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Moreover, couples are scared that their relationship will change. However, while the relationship changes, it can even change for the better and bring hopes of a new family.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"When-to-talk-about-getting-married\"><\/span>When to talk about getting married?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66546\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/newly-married-couple.jpg\" alt=\"Newly married couple in love\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You may wonder when is the right time to talk about marriage. When to have the talk about marriage in a relationship is an important question. Discussing marriage early in the relationship may seem a little awkward and is not even advised because this might scare your partner away.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Talking about marriage too soon is, therefore, not recommended. While they may also be looking for the same things as you, it is understandable that they may need a little more time to be so <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/quiz-are-you-with-the-man-should-marry\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sure about marrying<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Most couples decide to have the conversation way ahead of their engagement. According to a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.zola.com\/expert-advice\/how-to-announce-your-engagement\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">survey,<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> 94 percent of couples discuss engagements about six months before going forward. The same survey also found that about 30 percent of them talk about marriage weekly.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, when is the right time to talk about it and bring up marriage with your partner?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Look for signs that will help you understand if it is the right time to get married to your partner or if you should wait it out.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/pre-marriage\/7-important-questions-to-ask-your-partner-before-you-get-married\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Questions to Ask Your Partner Before Marriage<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Where-to-start\"><\/span>Where to start<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66547\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/happy-couple.jpg\" alt=\"Happy couple staring into each other's eyes\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can&rsquo;t just walk up to your partner one day and say,&rdquo; Let&rsquo;s talk about marriage!&rdquo; Where to start &ndash; This is a fundamental question when it comes to the topic of getting married. And the answer to that question is &ndash; with yourself.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you feel you want to have the marriage talk or have thoughts about it, there are some questions you should ask yourself before talking to them about marriage.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">These questions will help you be sure if you want to have that conversation with them and the topics you need to talk about.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ask yourself the reasons you want to get married to your partner.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ask if you think you are <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/commitment-and-seeing-it-through\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">ready for the commitment<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ask yourself if right now is the correct time to bring up marriage. If your partner is going through a tough time in their life, maybe putting this off for some time is a better idea.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Who all get impacted by this decision if you decide to get married any time soon?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are there more important questions &ndash; such as <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/ways-to-make-interfaith-relationships-work\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">religion<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, beliefs, and core values, that need to be considered before deciding?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/conversations-every-couple-needs-for-a-better-marriage\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have for a Better Marriage<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3-signs-that-help-you-know-it%E2%80%99s-time-to-talk-about-marriage\"><\/span><b>3 signs that help you know it&rsquo;s time to talk about marriage<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66548\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/Wedding_Rings.jpg\" alt=\"Gold wedding rings for couples\" width=\"600\" height=\"428\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you have been thinking about it but are unsure if it is the right time to talk about marriage with your partner, look for these signs.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If these can be checked off your list, it may be time to initiate the conversation with them.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. You&rsquo;re in a committed relationship &ndash; for a while<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/discussing-difficult-topics-in-your-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Marriage topics for discussion<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> aren&rsquo;t for those couples who have just been together for months.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We understand that you love each other and all, but talking about a wedding may require the test of time.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Most of the time,<\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">marriage conversation comes naturally for couples who have been together for years. They already established many years of trust and have known each other&rsquo;s families and even friends.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As they say, they&rsquo;re already <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.urmc.rochester.edu\/encyclopedia\/content.aspx?contenttypeid=1&amp;contentid=4580\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">living the &ldquo;married&rdquo; life<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and they have to tie the knot to make it formal.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">According to <\/span><a class=\"editor-rtfLink\" href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/jenni-jacobsen\" target=\"_blank\"><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Jennifer Jacobsen Schulz<\/span><\/a><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">, LCSW:<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">If you&rsquo;ve been together for a few years and seem compatible, it&rsquo;s <\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">totally<\/span><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\"> acceptable and natural to want to discuss the future of your relationship, including whether it&rsquo;s progressing toward marriage.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h3><b>2. You trust each other<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Marriage topics to talk about include your future, your life together, and being with this person for a lifetime &ndash; that&rsquo;s what marriage is all about.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.glaad.org\/sites\/default\/files\/allys-guide-to-talking-about-marriage.pdf\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Speak about marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> when you fully trust your partner.<\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you know, you can&rsquo;t live without him or her. From there, when to talk about marriage in a relationship will come naturally.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Also Try:<\/i><\/b> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/quiz-to-test-the-trust-between-you-and-your-partner\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Quiz To Test The Trust Between You And Your Partner<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>3. You have an undeniable connection<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You know it&rsquo;s time to talk about your wedding when you know you and your partner can already be sure that you have <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/emotional-intimacy\/how-important-is-an-emotional-connection-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">connected emotionally<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Can you imagine how to talk about marriage with your boyfriend or girlfriend when you don&rsquo;t know this person intimately?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-talk-about-marriage-with-your-boyfriend\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to Talk about Marriage with Your Boyfriend<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-to-talk-about-marriage\"><\/span><b>How to talk about marriage?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66549\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/coupel-talking-1.jpg\" alt=\"Man and woman talking seriously about their opinions\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you want to talk about marriage, you need to know what approach is required, depending on your partner.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Again, if it is already clear that this person doesn&rsquo;t believe in marriage, opening or deciding to talk about your wedding may not have a good outcome.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once you are sure, it&rsquo;s time to find the best approach on how to talk about marriage with your partner.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Here are some pointers that can help you talk about marriage with your partner:<\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Take the risk and initiate the conversation<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Make sure that your partner isn&rsquo;t sick, busy, or tired.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When to talk about marriage is important because you might end up <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/the-art-of-fighting-fair-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">having a fight<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or being mistaken as a nag if you don&rsquo;t know the right timing.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. Talk about future&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><b>How to discuss marriage with someone you love?&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A great way is to talk about your goals, life together, and your ideals in life. This is the time to get honest, and we mean it.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If not now, when will you tell this person their areas of improvement and their shortcomings?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can&rsquo;t marry someone with whom you can&rsquo;t be honest.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. Speak about your ideas and perspective in life&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are you the type of person who still wants to live near your parents? Do you want many kids? Are you an extravagant spender? Do you believe in buying branded things or would instead save?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s important to talk with your partner about all these things for a better understanding of the future.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/perspective-helps-relationship-grow\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How Perspective Helps Your Relationship Grow&nbsp;<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>4. Talk about marriage and your life as husband and wife<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Will you be the person who wants to know everything, or would you let your spouse get together with their friends often? <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The reality is, marriage will set boundaries and as early as now, better discuss them to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/save-your-marriage\/can-one-person-save-a-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">save your marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> later.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>5. Talk about how you would deal with your problems once you have one<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Will you be silent and just let it be, or would you rather talk about it? You both should decide how you will deal with the problems that arise in your marriage, because no relationship is perfect, but how you come out of the problems is important.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Remember that slight <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/tips-to-prevent-resentment-from-destroying-your-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">resentment can turn big and can affect your relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>6. Intimacy is a part of your marriage talk<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why is this so?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you know that you need to have all the intimacy aspects checked to keep a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/ways-to-build-a-strong-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">strong marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">? From physical, emotional, intellectual, to most of all, sexually.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/intimacy\/how-important-is-intimacy-in-a-relationship\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How Important Is Intimacy in a Relationship<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>7. Are you both willing to try pre-marriage therapies or consultations?<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why do you think it is essential, and how can it <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/pre-marriage\/benefits-of-couples-therapy-before-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">help you as a couple<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A mutual decision is needed for this, and this is the start of both of you thinking &ldquo;together&rdquo; as husband and wife.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/pre-marriage\/best-pre-marriage-course\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Best Pre Marriage Course Of 2021 That You Can Take Online<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>8. Talk about finances, your budget, and how you can save<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Marriage isn&rsquo;t just fun and games. It&rsquo;s the real thing, and if you think that you&rsquo;re already living together and that is enough, then you are wrong.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Marriage is a different commitment; it will test you, your ideals in life, and everything you thought you already knew.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/finance\/5-great-marriage-finance-tips\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Great Marriage Finance Tips<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>9. Be practical<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While keeping your emotions, wants, and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/how-to-communicate-your-needs-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">needs in front of each other<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and making decisions based on them is important, it is also equally important to make practical decisions to have a smoother future.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>10. Keep an open mind&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When talking about marriage to your partner, please do not close your mind to the possibilities and their thoughts. They may not want to get married immediately but maybe in a different situation in their lives. <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Being understanding of that and approaching the situation with an open mind is very important.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">After you have considered all these factors, ask yourself if you still want to talk about marriage? If so, then <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/readiness\/are-you-really-ready-for-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">you are indeed ready<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is all about being sure and being ready for the commitment, and once you have both agreed on these things, then you&rsquo;re <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/best-marriage-readiness-tips\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">prepared to tie the knot<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/things-you-should-know-about-your-girlfriend\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Things You Should Know Before Asking Your Girlfriend to Marry You<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Important-things-to-consider-before-having-the-talk\"><\/span><b>Important things to consider before having the talk<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66550\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/woman-signing-wedding-registar.jpg\" alt=\"Woman signing wedding register with flower bouquet in hand\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Even as you are sure that your partner is the one for you, there are a few things to consider before deciding to talk with them. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While love is the basis of marriages and is a prerequisite, there are many other things you need to consider before deciding if you should ask your partner to get married or not.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>If you are wondering what are the questions to ask before you get married, watch this video.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/5kj9tDwMAaE\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>Weigh the pros and cons<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While matters of the heart do not always weigh the pros and cons of the talk about marriage, doing so before you have the conversation with your partner may be a great idea.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It will help you understand your needs and non-negotiables and help you <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/tips-for-effective-communication-between-couples\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">communicate better with your partner<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>Play it out<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">marriage counselors<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and therapists make quizzes and games to help you understand if you and your partner are on the same page. These questions touch upon essential topics you need to discuss but in a fun way.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/are-we-ready-to-get-married\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Taking one such quiz<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> with your partner can help you discover many subjects that need to be talked about before you decide to tie the knot.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/marriage-preparation\/important-elements-of-marriage\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Important Things to Consider Before Getting Married<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>The bottom line<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Whether or not you decide to have the conversation immediately or even decide to wait for the discussion, it is important to establish good communication with your partner and make sure that you are on the same page.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Honesty and communication can go a long way in keeping your <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/14-ways-to-keep-your-relationship-strong-healthy-and-happy\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relationship healthy and happy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. While getting married may be important, being happy with each other is even more important.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Dr. Jenni Schulz highlights that:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Having the conversation may feel awkward, but eventually, a discussion on marriage is warranted. If you never have the conversation, you may end up stuck in a relationship with someone who isn&rsquo;t interested in marriage, which can be devastating if getting married is your desire.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Make sure your partner knows what you are feeling, and you both should be headed towards a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/pre-marriage\/6-basic-steps-to-getting-married\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">happily ever after<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have the conversation.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In any serious commitment or relationship, there may come a time where you will have to talk about marriage. Marriage is a big step, but when you&rsquo;ve been together for years, you feel that you have already established a strong connection. For some, the time may come sooner than others, and that is okay &ndash; like they say, when you know, you know. However, you may find yourself wondering, why are you not having &ldquo;the talk&rdquo; yet?&nbsp; You may want to talk about it but are just not sure which one should initiate it and how to do it.&nbsp; If <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":675,"featured_media":66544,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[21],"tags":[2624],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/44153"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/675"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=44153"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/44153\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":108243,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/44153\/revisions\/108243"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/66544"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=44153"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=44153"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=44153"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}