

{"id":42070,"date":"2019-09-10T05:46:10","date_gmt":"2019-09-10T05:46:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=42070"},"modified":"2026-01-03T08:31:37","modified_gmt":"2026-01-03T08:31:37","slug":"married-to-a-mamas-boy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/married-to-a-mamas-boy\/","title":{"rendered":"What to Do When You Realize That You\u2019re Married to a Mama\u2019s Boy?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-42072 size-full\" title=\"What to Do When You Realize That You&rsquo;re Married to a Mama&rsquo;s Boy\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/What-to-Do-When-You-Realize-That-You%E2%80%99re-Married-to-a-Mama%E2%80%99s-Boy.jpg\" alt=\"What to Do When You Realize That You&rsquo;re Married to a Mama&rsquo;s Boy\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You are proud of your husband because he&rsquo;s sweet and thoughtful, not to mention a real gentleman around the ladies.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">He knows how to respect and how to say the right things that charm women.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">He&rsquo;s such a catch and you&rsquo;re sure to be envied by your friends &ndash; until you realize why he&rsquo;s like that. After many months of being married, you finally see why he&rsquo;s such a gentleman and captivating &ndash; you married a <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">!&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Now, what do you do?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What-is-a-mama%E2%80%99s-boy\"><\/span>What is a mama&rsquo;s boy?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">He&rsquo;s such a <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">! You&rsquo;ve heard this phrase numerous times already but just how do you explain what the real mama&rsquo;s boy meaning is?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">is a child who is the apple of the eye of his mom but through the years, this meaning changed into a fully-grown male who is still very much dependent on his mother even in adulthood.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While you may think that it is harmless or just shows that a man is not independent, it can actually pose a threat not just with his maturity but also when he already has a family of his own.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A man who is already old enough to make decisions for himself but still lets his mother take the final decisions even if he already has a family is definitely amongst men with mom issues.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dealing with a <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">is not easy!&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many women who are married to one would swear to the fact that it&rsquo;s so hard to have to deal with a man who can&rsquo;t really do anything without his mom&rsquo;s final say.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-to-spot-a-mama%E2%80%99s-boy\"><\/span>How to spot a mama&rsquo;s boy<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Just how do you know the signs of <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">in full-grown married men?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">At first, you may not realize that your boyfriend or the person you are dating is a certified <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. In fact, they can even pass off as just someone really sweet with their mothers and being in this stage of dating, you wouldn&rsquo;t really be noticing any signs.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once you are married, this is the time that you&rsquo;ll just wonder how to deal with a momma&rsquo;s boy.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The signs will start to show, and here are just some of the signs that you are married to momma&rsquo;s boy.<\/span><\/p>\n<ol><li><b>Mommy&rsquo;s request is his top priority<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Is your husband too busy for you but is always available when his mom calls? Is your husband always the one who accompanies her to the grocery, paying bills, and even when she has to go to the doctor?&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you often see that your husband is<\/span><b> busy with his phone<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> but he&rsquo;s not flirting with other girls, he&rsquo;s actually <\/span><b>talking to his mom<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, like more than once a day!<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What to do when your husband <\/span><b>chooses his family over you and your children<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">? If you feel that this is something you should think about, then you&rsquo;re married to a man who would rather choose his mom than his family.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When making big decisions, your husband <\/span><b>includes his mom&rsquo;s opinion<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><b>Your <\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/mental-health\/narcissistic-mother-in-law\/\"><b>mother-in-law<\/b><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> visits very often and <\/span><b>makes the changes she likes in your home<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Does your husband or long-time boyfriend always <\/span><b>compare you with his mom<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">? Does he tell you how different your steak is unlike how his mom does it?&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;My mother in law acts like she is married to my husband,&rdquo; if you have found yourself uttering these words then most likely, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/purpose-of-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">you are married<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to a <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lastly, you live near his mom&rsquo;s home or in fact, you live with her.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Husband-and-mother-in-law-problems-%E2%80%93-setting-boundaries\"><\/span>Husband and mother-in-law problems &ndash; setting boundaries<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-42073 size-full\" title=\"Husband and mother-in-law problems &ndash; setting boundaries\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/Husband-and-mother-in-law-problems-%E2%80%93-setting-boundaries.jpg\" alt=\"Husband and mother-in-law problems &ndash; setting boundaries\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you aren&rsquo;t yet married but already in a serious relationship, you&rsquo;d, of course, want to know how to deal with a <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">boyfriend and to make a point.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You don&rsquo;t want to feel like you&rsquo;re the third wheel here, right?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, the real question here is, before the husband and mother-in-law problems get out of hand, we want to know how to change a momma&rsquo;s boy<\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">and <\/span><b>get him to man up for himself and for you<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> &ndash; his family.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Most women would think that letting him choose and nagging him about how he should stop being a momma&rsquo;s boy works, but this isn&rsquo;t the ideal approach because this will cause his ego to get hurt, he would also get hurt with the words you will be saying and will build tension and resentment.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Also, his mom would also find out, so that&rsquo;ll cause more trouble.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1-Talk-and-set-boundaries\"><\/span>1. Talk and set boundaries<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<blockquote><p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Let your husband know that you understand and you will respect his bond with his mom but he also needs to adjust for you and the children if you have any.&nbsp;<\/span><\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You don&rsquo;t have to always be there for your mother-in-law as your husband does. Instead, if they want to have dinner together or want to go out, you can politely decline.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">According to <\/span><a class=\"editor-rtfLink\" href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/grady-shumway\" target=\"_blank\"><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Grady Shumway<\/span><\/a><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">, LMHC:<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span data-preserver-spaces=\"true\">Clear, respectful boundaries help protect your well-being while still honoring important family relationships. When both partners communicate their needs openly, it becomes much easier to create a balanced dynamic that supports the marriage.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2-Focus-on-yourself-as-a-wife-and-a-mother-to-your-children\"><\/span>2. Focus on yourself as a wife and a mother to your children<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<blockquote><p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Along the way, talk to your husband about how he should also set some boundaries as this is your household and not his mothers&rsquo; territory.&nbsp;<\/span><\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Limiting her control over your home will be liberating as well as an eye-opener that you are the queen of your home.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3-Express-your-emotions-to-your-husband-but-do-it-nicely\"><\/span>3. Express your emotions to your husband but do it nicely<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<blockquote><p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Don&rsquo;t be the bad guy in this situation.&nbsp;<\/span><\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can befriend your mother-in-law and talk about raising families. You can also talk to your husband about comparing and that it&rsquo;s not really nice to do that &ndash; again do these things nicely.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"4-More-patience-is-what-you-will-be-needing\"><\/span>4. More patience is what you will be needing<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Just like the term <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, it may seem that your husband is still a young boy who deeply loves and depends on his mother. This is something that you will gradually change but do it slowly.<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A <\/span><\/i><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">mama&rsquo;s boy<\/span><\/i><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> isn&rsquo;t that all a bad thing, in fact, it makes him compassionate and respectful towards people.&nbsp;<\/span><\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s just sometimes, the thought of having competition for his attention, the clash between wife and mother in law becomes too stressful but it&rsquo;s still something that you can definitely work on &ndash; after all, you are a family.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Grady Shumway highlights that:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Giving the relationship time to adjust can ease tension and help new patterns take hold naturally. With steady communication and mutual support, families often find a rhythm that honors everyone&rsquo;s place without compromising the marriage.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You are proud of your husband because he&rsquo;s sweet and thoughtful, not to mention a real gentleman around the ladies.&nbsp; He knows how to respect and how to say the right things that charm women.&nbsp; He&rsquo;s such a catch and you&rsquo;re sure to be envied by your friends &ndash; until you realize why he&rsquo;s like that. After many months of being married, you finally see why he&rsquo;s such a gentleman and captivating &ndash; you married a mama&rsquo;s boy!&nbsp; Now, what do you do?&nbsp; What is a mama&rsquo;s boy? He&rsquo;s such a mama&rsquo;s boy! You&rsquo;ve heard this phrase numerous times already <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1419,"featured_media":42072,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2502],"tags":[2605],"class_list":["post-42070","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-navigating-challenges","tag-resolve-ongoing-conflict","has_thumb"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42070","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=42070"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42070\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":115572,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42070\/revisions\/115572"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/42072"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=42070"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=42070"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=42070"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}