

{"id":41658,"date":"2019-08-27T08:49:53","date_gmt":"2019-08-27T08:49:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=41658"},"modified":"2024-07-30T04:31:51","modified_gmt":"2024-07-30T04:31:51","slug":"stages-of-divorce-for-a-man","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/divorce\/stages-of-divorce-for-a-man\/","title":{"rendered":"Well Explained Stages Of Divorce For A Man"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-41660 size-full\" title=\"Understand the 6 Stages of Divorce for a Man\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/Understand-the-6-Stages-of-Divorce-for-a-Man.jpg\" alt=\"Understand the 6 Stages of Divorce for a Man\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There is a <\/span><b>myth perpetuated by certain circles<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that <\/span><b>men have it easy<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> when it <\/span><b>comes to divorce<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, or at the very least, better than their female partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But there are stages of divorce for a man, and they just don&rsquo;t wake up one day after their marriage ends and be happy. It&rsquo;s also a long and winding road.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The truth is, a lot of<\/span><b> men go through<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> the <\/span><b>same emotional stages of divorce<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> just as hard as women.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What-divorce-does-to-a-man\"><\/span><b>What divorce does to a man<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Divorce can have a profound impact on a man&rsquo;s life. Emotionally, it can bring feelings of grief, loss, and loneliness, as the end of a marriage often means the dissolution of dreams and companionship. Men may struggle with a sense of identity and self-worth, questioning their roles as husbands and fathers.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Financially, divorce can be devastating, leading to a division of assets, alimony, and child support payments.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can also strain relationships with children, causing a sense of distance or alienation. However, divorce can also be an opportunity for personal growth, resilience, and the chance to build a new, fulfilling life.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-divorce-affects-and-changes-a-man\"><\/span><b>How divorce affects and changes a man<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Divorce is a big change that can have a strong impact on a man. It brings a lot of emotions and challenges that can make him feel different. Ending a marriage can bring sadness, anger, and confusion. It can make him question who he is and what is important to him.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When it comes to the emotions of a man going through divorce, going through it be tough, but it can also be a chance for him to figure things out, heal, and find new paths in life. It affects his feelings, relationships, and plans for the future.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This article talks about the changes further: <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/divorce\/how-divorce-changes-a-man\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How Divorce Changes a Man: 10 Possible Ways<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The-Pre-divorce-stage\"><\/span><b>The Pre-divorce stage<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s almost unheard of that a happy couple go through a divorce. Prior to the divorce, there are a <\/span><b>couple of stages of divorce<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> for a man or woman to cover &ndash; the pair will fight a lot, maybe do a trial separation, or simply ignore each other. There are cases where they start looking for new partners while they are in a loveless marriage.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>In this turbulent time<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, a lot of <\/span><b>men turn to substance abuse<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to get over their problems. Obviously, this only makes things worse.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Both genders<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> are also <\/span><b>susceptible to infidelity<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> during this stage. Once the divorce papers are served, it marks the beginning of the real journey.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Understanding-6-emotional-stages-of-divorce-for-a-man\"><\/span><b>Understanding 6 emotional stages of divorce for a man<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Men and divorce emotional stages can be overwhelming, to say the least. Let&rsquo;s understand the stages of divorce for a man.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. The denial stage<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Studies show that it&rsquo;s more likely that a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/cordellcordell.com\/2017\/7-stages-grief-divorced-men\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">woman initiates a divorce than a man<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. <\/span><b>Most men <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">who are in a toxic relationship <\/span><b>use the escapism defense mechanism<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, than actually escape. Hence, it&rsquo;s difficult to discuss matters with men about their failing marriage.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Life after divorce is not easy for everyone; some accept it better than others.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/divorce\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">divorce papers are served<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, their world comes crashing down, and <\/span><b>they<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> would <\/span><b>revert further into substance abuse<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or <\/span><b>other defense mechanisms<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. More often than not, it makes things worse.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The shock of reality falling over their heads will make them reject it even more.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. Pain and sorrow<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some experts consider this is one of the first stages of divorce for a man.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Short of going completely mental<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, there is <\/span><b>nothing<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> drugs, alcohol, and <\/span><b>cheap women can do<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to<\/span><b> escape reality<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Pain sets in and the way a <\/span><b>person reacts<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to it ranges <\/span><b>from ignoring the problem<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, shutting down completely, <\/span><b>going ballistic<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and <\/span><b>everything else in between<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your <\/span><b>partner<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> tends to <\/span><b>act violently<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, leave the house and <\/span><b>take the children with you<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Men and divorce emotional stages can get nasty.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You never know what someone might do when they are in pain.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. Anger or bargaining<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><b>During the pain<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and desperation stage, all sorts of<\/span><b> negative thoughts come to mind<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. They would lash out at friends, family, and inanimate objects.&nbsp; <\/span><b>Some men<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> would prostrate themselves and <\/span><b>beg for forgiveness<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That is why a <\/span><b>man<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> going through a divorce <\/span><b>becomes unpredictable<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. The <\/span><b>pain of divorce<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> for men <\/span><b>depends on their attachment<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to their partner, children, and their <\/span><b>shattered ego<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If the relationship has gotten to this point, it means irreconcilable differences happen a lot like a vicious circle. <\/span><b>Most women<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> are willing to <\/span><b>forgive a man<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> if they apologize for their mistakes.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But most women won&rsquo;t do it if this is the nth time it has happened.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Depression and loneliness<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-41661 size-full\" title=\"Depression and loneliness\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/Depression-and-loneliness.jpg\" alt=\"Depression and loneliness\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is one of the worst stages of divorce for a man.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>According to marriage mentor <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/christiana-njoku\">Christiana Njoku<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>No doubt, divorce can cause a man to break down, even down to being depressed.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once the divorce is complete, a broken man after divorce is left to their own devices. They will have a <\/span><b>lot of time thinking<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> about what has gone wrong. It is especially true if they genuinely love their children and lost custody of them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.huffpost.com\/entry\/men-after-divorce-ego-sel_b_3145814\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It shatters their ego and self-esteem<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. It usually <\/span><b>results in an unhealthy lifestyle<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp; This is the turning point of a man&rsquo;s divorce journey. They either find a way to become a better person from here or end up a total mess.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is the decisive step of all the stages of divorce for a man. They either stay here and self-destruct, or move on.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In all the stages of grief after divorce, the <\/span><b>depression stage is the longest<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. This is where it&rsquo;s essential to know how to move on after a divorce as a man. The problem is, <\/span><b>there is no silver bullet<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> in how to overcome a divorce.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Getting over a divorce for a man depends on individual circumstances.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A good rule of thumb is to <\/span><b>avoid destructive behavior<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and<\/span><b> indulge in constructive ones<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. That is the best way on how to cope with divorce as a man.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Also watch:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> 7 Most Common Reasons for Divorce<\/span><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/GDijrLvw6D0\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h3><b>5. Rebuilding or destroying their lives<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The longer men going through divorce stay on the previous stage, the more damage they do to their health, career, and future in general.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Some men<\/b> <b>spend<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> the rest of their <\/span><b>lives in the previous stage<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and <\/span><b>commit suicide.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><b>Some <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">end up as <\/span><b>negative personas<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and <\/span><b>ruin<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> all their <\/span><b>other relationships<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and eventually, their own lives. Those that turn to substance abuse get worse until they end up sick, dead, or in jail.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But a lot of men &ldquo;get their shit together&rdquo; and willfully start over.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/separation\/life-after-divorce-for-men\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">start dating right away<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, regardless of how shallow it is, <\/span><b>their ego<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> would<\/span><b> not let them stay down<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. They would subconsciously target attractive young women for trophies.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Workaholic men will be more obsessive when it comes to their job.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They would <\/span><b>rely on career advancements<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to <\/span><b>boost up<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> their <\/span><b>self-esteem<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Eventually, they settle in their new routine and start all over again. If the big question is, how long does it take for a man to get over a divorce, there&rsquo;s no clear cut answer.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So long as it takes to get to the next stage after this because there are a lot who never do.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>6. Acceptance and moving on<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Those <\/span><b>men<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> who are able to <\/span><b>rebuild their lives<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, learn to <\/span><b>leave the past behind<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. <\/span><b>Some <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">of them <\/span><b>find love again<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or <\/span><b>spend<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> their days <\/span><b>looking after their children<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. It takes a while to get there, but some do complete the stages of divorce for a man.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some <\/span><b>self-destructive individuals fail<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, but <\/span><b>most don&rsquo;t<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. They <\/span><b>accept their fate<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and <\/span><b>live with it<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5-ways-to-move-on-after-divorce\"><\/span><b>5 ways to move on after divorce<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Moving on after a divorce can be an emotionally challenging process. It takes time and effort to heal from the pain and upheaval that divorce brings.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, with determination and a positive mindset, it is possible to rebuild your life and find happiness again. Here are five effective ways of surviving divorce for a man:<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Allow yourself to grieve<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Divorce is a significant loss, and it&rsquo;s essential to acknowledge and process your emotions. Give yourself permission to grieve the end of your marriage. Allow yourself to feel anger, sadness, and disappointment. It&rsquo;s a natural part of the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/divorce\/healing-through-divorce\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">healing process<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Surround yourself with a support system of friends, family, or a therapist who can provide a safe space for you to express your emotions.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. Focus on self-care<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Divorce can leave you feeling depleted, both emotionally and physically. Make self-care a priority during this challenging time. Engage in activities that bring you joy and peace.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Christiana Njoku adds:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Divorce can be highly devastating, and it&rsquo;s important at this time to take care of yourself.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Exercise regularly, eat healthily, get enough sleep, and practice relaxation techniques such as meditation or yoga. Taking care of yourself will boost your self-esteem and help you regain a sense of control over your life.<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/the-pillars-of-self-care\/\" title=\"The 5 Pillars of Self-Care\">The 5 Pillars of Self-Care<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>3. Rediscover your identity<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">After a divorce, it&rsquo;s common to feel lost or disconnected from who you are as an individual. Take this opportunity to rediscover yourself. Reconnect with hobbies and passions you may have set aside during your marriage.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Explore new interests and learn new skills. Set personal goals and focus on personal growth. By investing in yourself, you can rebuild your confidence and create a fulfilling life.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Establish a support system<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Surrounding yourself with a supportive network is crucial during the post-divorce period. Seek out friends, family, or support groups who have experienced similar situations. Share your feelings and concerns with them, and listen to their advice and stories.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Connecting with others who understand what you&rsquo;re going through can provide comfort and reassurance. Additionally, consider seeking professional help from a therapist who specializes in divorce recovery.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>5. Embrace the future<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Moving on from divorce involves letting go of the past and embracing the possibilities that lie ahead. Accept that the marriage has ended and focus on creating a brighter future for yourself. Set new goals and aspirations for your personal and professional life.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Create a vision of the life you want to lead and take proactive steps towards making it a reality. Remember that you have the power to shape your future and that the end of a marriage does not define your worth or happiness.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Takeaway\"><\/span><b>Takeaway<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We can&rsquo;t honestly say, <\/span><b>some learn from their mistakes<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, while others spend the rest of their lives paying for it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stages of divorce for men and coping with a divorce from their partner&rsquo;s infidelity is particularly<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-accept-and-move-on-from-a-relationship\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">susceptible to change<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. A <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/therapy\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relationship therapist<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> can help make the process easy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A <\/span><b>lot of divorced men<\/b> <b>become<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> an entirely <\/span><b>new person altogether<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There is a myth perpetuated by certain circles that men have it easy when it comes to divorce, or at the very least, better than their female partner. But there are stages of divorce for a man, and they just don&rsquo;t wake up one day after their marriage ends and be happy. It&rsquo;s also a long and winding road. The truth is, a lot of men go through the same emotional stages of divorce just as hard as women. What divorce does to a man Divorce can have a profound impact on a man&rsquo;s life. Emotionally, it can bring feelings <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1419,"featured_media":41660,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[17],"tags":[2685],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/41658"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=41658"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/41658\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":103278,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/41658\/revisions\/103278"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/41660"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=41658"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=41658"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=41658"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}