

{"id":3983,"date":"2015-12-23T07:05:57","date_gmt":"2015-12-23T07:05:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=3983"},"modified":"2026-03-19T10:55:19","modified_gmt":"2026-03-19T10:55:19","slug":"five-contemporary-intimacy-exercises-for-married-couples","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/intimacy\/five-contemporary-intimacy-exercises-for-married-couples\/","title":{"rendered":"Five Contemporary Intimacy Exercises for Married Couples"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-110970\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/2388352669-2-1.jpg\" alt=\"cute happy couple\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some of us may still fall victim to the belief system that &ldquo;true love happens naturally&rdquo; and the implication that &ldquo;work need not apply&rdquo; to loving relationships. If you are guilty of this type of thinking, you may be in trouble. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The reality is, real love takes real work and effort, long after the move-in date or the exchanging of vows. But knowing how to build it is another subject entirely.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/intimacy\/ways-to-grow-intimacy-in-a-marriage\/\"><strong>Intimacy in marriage<\/strong><\/a> is a combination of physical, emotional, mental, and even spiritual closeness that you develop with your partner as you share your lives with each other.<\/p>\n<p><span data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"couples intimacy games\"}' data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}'>Building intimacy in a marriage is essential for strengthening the bond that a couple shares.&nbsp;<\/span>So what can couples do to build intimacy in their marriage?<\/p>\n<p><span data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"couples intimacy games\"}' data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}'>Be it couples intimacy games, intimacy exercises for married couples, or&nbsp;relationship-building activities for couples you should always keep striving to find ways to keep your relationship intimate.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Let this article prepare you to get started with some<strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/\">marriage intimacy<\/a> exercises for couples to reconnect<\/strong> which are frequently recommended in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/therapy\/\">couples&rsquo; therapy<\/a>. <\/span><\/p>\n<p>These &lsquo;couple exercises for intimacy&rsquo; by relationship coach <a href=\"https:\/\/www.jordangrayconsulting.com\/6-connection-exercises-for-couples-to-build-intimacy\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\">Jordan Gray<\/a> will work wonders for your married life!<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1-Extra-long-cuddle\"><\/span>1. Extra-long cuddle<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Let&rsquo;s kick things off with an easy one. Choose the time, whether at night or in the morning, and spend that precious time just snuggling for 30 minutes at least. If you normally snuggle for this length of time, increase it to an hour.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Why does it work?<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Physical closeness is one of the hallmarks of bonding. The pheromones, kinetic energy, and chemical reactions that happen just by snuggling with your loved one create the sense of connectedness necessary in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/top-characteristics-of-a-healthy-relationship\/\">healthy relationships<\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Not only does this work as a&nbsp;<span data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"sex therapy exercises\"}' data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}'>sex therapy exercises but also as an&nbsp;emotional intimacy exercise.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2-Breathing-connection-exercise\"><\/span>2. Breathing connection exercise<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Like many<strong> intimate activities,<\/strong> this one may seem silly at first, but open your mind to trying it and you may just love it.&nbsp;<\/span>You and your partner will face one another seated, and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/intimacy\/the-power-of-touch-in-your-marriage\/\">lightly touch your foreheads together<\/a>, eyes closed.<\/p>\n<p>You will begin to breathe, deep, intentional breaths in tandem. &nbsp;The recommended number of breaths in tandem starts at 7, but you and your partner can participate for as many breaths as you like.<\/p>\n<p><b>Why does it work<i>?<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The touch, and the experience of the touch, aligned with the breathing, brings about natural feelings of connectedness through the shared energy exchanged via the brow or &ldquo;third eye&rdquo; chakra. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This may tap into some of our most primal resources in our ability to engage in spirituality and to exchange energetic forces through organic means.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3-Soul-gaze\"><\/span>3. Soul gaze<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In this <strong>building intimacy exercise<\/strong>, you are merely sitting faced to one another and will stare into one another&rsquo;s eyes, imagining that the eyes are a &ldquo;window into the soul&rdquo;. As many of these types of exercises may seem corny at first, this one is a classic. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Though you may indeed feel awkward in the beginning, &nbsp;as you get used to sitting and gazing into one another&rsquo;s eyes the exercise becomes relaxing and meditative. Try putting it to music so that you have &nbsp;4-5 minutes of timed focus.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Why does it work?<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This type of exercise tends to slow things down. &nbsp;It should be done several times per week for maximum benefit. &nbsp;In today&rsquo;s busy world, focusing for 4-5 minutes just gazing into one another&rsquo;s eyes helps the couple to relax and regroup. &nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Yes, it is okay to blink during the exercise, but try and avoid talking. &nbsp;Some couples use a 4 or 5 minute song to set the background and time.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-10400 size-full\" title=\"Soul gazing\" src=\"http:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/70-1.jpg\" alt=\"Soul gazing\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"4-Three-things\"><\/span>4. Three things<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You and your partner can play this one however you like. &nbsp;One of you may state your things all in one go, or you may alternate. &nbsp;Think of the questions you want to ask; write them down if it helps. &nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>The questions will be phrased as such:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What 3 things will you want to eat for dessert this month?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What 3 things will you be sure to take with you on an adventure to a tropical island?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What 3 things do you hope to do together that we haven&rsquo;t tried?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">These are merely examples; you get the idea. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Why does it work?<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is an <strong>intimacy and marriage<\/strong>&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/couple-counseling-exercises-to-improve-communication\/\">communication exercise<\/a>. It enhances the bond between you by increasing communication skills and provides knowledge of one another&rsquo;s thoughts, feelings, and interests. &nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is also helpful as interests can change over time. The answers will also yield information that will most likely prove useful in the future.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5-Two-ears-one-mouth\"><\/span>5. Two ears, one mouth<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/become-a-better-listener\/\">In this active listening exercise<\/a>, one partner talks or &ldquo;vents&rdquo; on a topic of their choosing, while the other partner must sit facing them, merely listening and not speaking. &nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The both of you may be amazed at how unnatural it can feel to actually just listen without speaking. &nbsp;After the five minutes, three minutes, or eight-minute rant is over, the listener then is free to express feedback<\/span><b>.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><b>Why does it work?<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong>Active listening practice<\/strong> is another communication exercise that enhances our ability to truly listen and take in another&rsquo;s stream of consciousness. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Focusing on them intently without distractions gives them the sense of our undivided attention; something of vital importance but of which is rare in today&rsquo;s busy world. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Intentional listening also reminds us to stay focused on the other person without asserting our opinions prematurely. At the end of this exercise, you will exchange places as speaker\/listener.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-10401 size-full\" title=\"Bedtime exercises\" src=\"http:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/72-1.jpg\" alt=\"Bedtime exercises\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Additional-bedtime-couples-exercises-and-tips-for-better-intimacy\"><\/span>Additional bedtime couples exercises and tips for better intimacy<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>Here are some amazing bedtime routines to incorporate into your daily lives for better intimacy:<\/p>\n<ul><li><b><b>Keep your phones away: <\/b><\/b><b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Not only is keeping the phone away great for your relationship but having zero electronic light is also beneficial for sleep hygiene as well. It will really <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">work wonders for the quality of sleep that you&rsquo;ll be able to get. &nbsp;<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/b><br><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/prioritize-your-relationship-partner-and-sexual-connection\/\">Prioritize your connection with your partner<\/a> <\/strong>for some time before you doze off &ndash; talk about the day, your feelings or anything else that&rsquo;s on your mind. Make sure to switch off the phones or light a few fragrant candles or two to bond better.<\/span><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul><ul><li><b><b><b>Sleep naked: <\/b><\/b><\/b><b><b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Taking all your clothes off before you sleep has proven health benefits (<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">it regulates cortisol, is great for genital health and improves skin quality too). <\/span><\/b><\/b>This is one of the best&nbsp;couples sex therapy exercises.&nbsp;&nbsp;<b><b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Additionally, &nbsp;it also allows you and your partner to have more skin on skin contact which results in the release of oxytocin.<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Plus, it makes having sex in the morning so much easier!&nbsp;<\/span><\/b><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul><ul><li><b>Massage each other: <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Massaging each other is a great routine to keep! Imagine you&rsquo;ve had a tough day and are being pampered by your partner with a loving massage. Whatever your reason, massage is a great tool for enhanced relaxation before bedtime and couples connection. <\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><ul><li><b>Show gratitude: <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you know what sucks at the end of the day? Criticism. Now replace that with gratitude and you&rsquo;ll see what a difference it makes to your life. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/love\/10-ways-to-show-gratitude-to-your-spouse\/\">Say thanks at the end of the day to your spouse<\/a> and you&rsquo;ll notice how rewarding life becomes. <\/span><b><br><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul><ul><li><b>Have sex: <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The best way to reconnect at night as a couple is to have sex! Of course, you cannot do it every single day. But, do engage with each other intimately\/sexually and explore new and limitless options every single night.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dedicate <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">at least 30-60 minutes of your day&nbsp;on<strong>&nbsp;couples therapy exercises<\/strong> with your spouse and witness the upward spiral effect of it in all areas of your lives. <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Some of us may still fall victim to the belief system that &ldquo;true love happens naturally&rdquo; and the implication that &ldquo;work need not apply&rdquo; to loving relationships. If you are guilty of this type of thinking, you may be in trouble. The reality is, real love takes real work and effort, long after the move-in date or the exchanging of vows. But knowing how to build it is another subject entirely. Intimacy in marriage is a combination of physical, emotional, mental, and even spiritual closeness that you develop with your partner as you share your lives with each other. Building <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":110970,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[31],"tags":[2524],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3983"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3983"}],"version-history":[{"count":25,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3983\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":118521,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3983\/revisions\/118521"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/110970"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3983"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3983"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3983"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}