{"id":36707,"date":"2019-04-17T06:19:19","date_gmt":"2019-04-17T06:19:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=36707"},"modified":"2025-08-26T10:27:56","modified_gmt":"2025-08-26T10:27:56","slug":"get-over-infidelity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/get-over-infidelity\/","title":{"rendered":"How Long Does It Take to Get Over Infidelity: 11 Tips"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\"Unhappy<\/p>\n

Betrayal can feel like the ground has shifted beneath your feet—suddenly, nothing feels steady. The questions come rushing in: “Why did this happen? How do I move forward? Will things ever feel normal again?” <\/span><\/p>\n

Healing after such a blow doesn’t happen overnight; it often feels like a tug-of-war between hope and hurt. Many wonder how long does it take to get over infidelity, and the truth is, it’s different for everyone. <\/span><\/p>\n

Some days bring peace, others stir up old wounds… but little by little, strength returns, trust reshapes, and a new sense of self begins to take root.<\/span><\/p>\n

How long does it take to get over infidelity?<\/b><\/p>\n

Healing after betrayal doesn’t come with a fixed timeline. <\/span>For some, the pain may ease within six months to a year, while for others, it can take several years depending on the depth of the relationship,<\/b> the support system, and the willingness of both partners to rebuild. <\/span><\/p>\n

According to<\/span> Grady Shumway<\/span><\/a>, a licensed mental health counselor:<\/span><\/p>\n

Healing from infidelity is a deeply personal journey, and there’s no set timeline for recovery.<\/span><\/p>\n

With patience, open communication, and commitment to healing, many couples can rebuild trust and emerge stronger, though the process can take time.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

So, when asking how long does it take to get over infidelity, the honest answer is—<\/span>there’s no universal clock, only personal pace.<\/b><\/p>\n

<\/p><\/div><\/span><\/p>\n

For example<\/b>: One couple might find a way back to each other in under a year, using counseling and open communication to rebuild trust. Another person, choosing to leave the relationship, may still feel echoes of the betrayal long after moving on. The difference often lies in the paths taken—not just the passage of time.<\/span><\/p>\n

Please note:<\/b><\/h4>\n

If you’re in the middle of this journey, please remember—healing isn’t about rushing or meeting a deadline. It’s about allowing yourself space, kindness, and patience. The heart does mend, even if slowly, and one day the pain will feel lighter than it does today.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>4 stages of healing after an affair<\/b><\/span><\/h2>\n

\"Couple<\/p>\n

Recovering from an affair is one of the hardest emotional journeys, and it rarely follows a straight path. Many people wonder how long does it take to get over infidelity, but the truth is, healing depends on the person, the relationship, and the choices made along the way. <\/span><\/p>\n

Understanding the<\/span> stages of recovery <\/span><\/a>can make the process feel less overwhelming and provide a sense of direction when everything feels uncertain.<\/span><\/p>\n

Stage 1: Shock and denial<\/b><\/h3>\n

The first stage often comes with disbelief and emotional numbness. It may feel unreal, as if the relationship you knew has vanished overnight. This is the mind’s way of cushioning the blow.<\/span><\/p>\n

Stage 2: Anger and grief<\/b><\/h3>\n

As reality sinks in, emotions can surge—anger, sadness, blame, or even shame. This stage is painful but natural. It reflects the deep<\/span> loss of trust<\/span><\/a> and connection caused by the betrayal.<\/span><\/p>\n

Stage 3: Reflection and understanding<\/b><\/h3>\n

Here, the focus shifts from raw pain to processing what happened. Questions about getting over infidelity begin to surface. Some seek therapy, while others lean on self-reflection or supportive communities to find clarity.<\/span><\/p>\n

Stage 4: Rebuilding or letting go<\/b><\/h3>\n

The final stage involves making choices: <\/span>rebuilding the relationship<\/span><\/a> with trust and commitment, or moving forward separately. Both paths are valid when learning how to get over infidelity, and both can lead to peace and growth.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>11 healing tips to get over infidelity<\/b><\/span><\/h2>\n

Healing after betrayal takes time, patience, and gentle care for yourself. There isn’t a quick fix, but there are small, steady steps that can help ease the pain and guide you toward clarity. <\/span><\/p>\n

Whether the goal is rebuilding the relationship or finding strength to move forward on your own, these tips can offer direction when everything feels heavy. Think of them as gentle reminders—you don’t have to do everything at once, just one step at a time, in a way that feels right for you.<\/span><\/p>\n

1. Honesty is the best policy<\/b><\/h3>\n

How to move past cheating? <\/span>Be honest with each other.<\/b><\/p>\n

Grady Shumway, LMHC, further shares:<\/span><\/p>\n

Honesty lays the foundation for rebuilding trust and understanding in a relationship after infidelity. Both partners need to openly address their feelings, motivations, and expectations for moving forward to heal and create a stronger bond.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The saying does not exist for nothing. If you really wish to get over<\/span> infidelity in a relationship<\/span><\/a>, <\/span>one of the most important things to do is be honest. <\/b><\/p>\n

A research paper published in <\/span>Social Psychological and Personality Science<\/span><\/a> states that the act of expressing honesty—and perceiving honesty in a partner enhances both personal and relational well‑being, satisfaction, and motivation to change.<\/p><\/div><\/span><\/p>\n

The cheater and the spouse they cheated on should be very honest about what happened, what led to it, and where they want to go. If you do not talk honestly with each other, the relationship is likely to go down.<\/span><\/p>\n