{"id":35180,"date":"2019-03-02T09:47:13","date_gmt":"2019-03-02T09:47:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=35180"},"modified":"2023-05-08T07:27:02","modified_gmt":"2023-05-08T07:27:02","slug":"common-relationship-mistakes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/common-relationship-mistakes\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Fix Common Relationship Mistakes"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\"How<\/p>\n

Relationships are never as easy or as simple as you might wish them to be. The many challenges and hurdles that keep appearing in the love game have plagued people earlier and is still very much prevalent even today. <\/span><\/p>\n

In matters of the heart, there are psychological reasons that work silently behind such challenges and hindrances.  <\/span><\/p>\n

Couples tend to commit some mindless errors, thereby, making matters worse for both the partners. And these mistakes are likely to make love a challenging game to accomplish for young couples.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>What are the common errors frequently committed by young couples?<\/span><\/h2>\n

As mentioned earlier, couples tend to make silly mistakes while in relationships. <\/span><\/p>\n

Some of the more frequent mistakes –<\/span><\/p>\n

  1. Unrealistic expectations of the relationship<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. Unresolved feelings or pain from the past<\/span><\/li>\n
  3. Being overly passive OR overly controlling<\/span><\/li>\n
  4. Difficulty addressing things directly<\/span><\/li>\n
  5. Fear of conflict<\/span><\/li>\n
  6. Putting someone else’s needs ahead of your own<\/span><\/li>\n
  7. Trying to change\/fix others<\/span><\/li>\n
  8. Believing that someone can “complete” you or make you whole<\/span><\/li>\n
  9. Dishonesty<\/span><\/li>\n
  10. Blaming<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>

    Other errors of higher magnitude include sexual issues, differing values and being intolerant of differences between you and those that you love. Besides the challenges, there are good things also which you can expect out of such amorous alliances. <\/span><\/p>\n

    “He helped me to move past some tough times and challenges and helped me to feel more hopeful about the future.” -Vito<\/span><\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

    From a positive perspective, relationship challenges can actually help the couples to grow individually and work together for a better partnership by finding ways to overcome relationship challenges as a team.<\/span><\/p>\n

    <\/span>How can you improve your relationship with your partner?<\/span><\/h2>\n

    Despite the challenges, there are many things that can be done to improve your relationship. <\/span><\/p>\n

    <\/span>1. Focus on yourself<\/span><\/h2>\n

    You cannot change, control, or fix someone. You are not responsible for how someone feels or acts. Be responsible for yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

    Cultivate an awareness of your reactions. Know what your internal conflicts are and see what you can change. <\/span><\/p>\n

    <\/span>2. Stop blaming others<\/span><\/h2>\n

    People often start a conversation by saying “you…” pointing out what the person is doing or not doing. <\/span><\/p>\n

    This typically results in the listener feeling blamed, becoming defensive, and blaming back. Keep the focus on yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

    <\/span>3. Be assertive and direct<\/span><\/h2>\n

    If you feel controlled, let the person who is controlling know. Express<\/span> your feelings at the crux of the moment when you feel your partner is displaying their controlling nature. You need to identify your wants, needs, and expectations from your relationship and express the<\/span>se directly. <\/span><\/p>\n

    Don’t expect the other person to read your mind. <\/span><\/p>\n

    <\/span>4. Show appreciation<\/span><\/h2>\n

    Show appreciation both for the person you are relating to and for yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

    <\/span>5. Pay attention to what your partner says<\/span><\/h2>\n

    \"Pay<\/p>\n

    Listen closely to what is being said and reflect back what you hear. Strong feelings arise when we express deep personal issues. <\/span><\/p>\n

    These feelings interfere with our ability to pay attention and prompt us to defend ourselves. <\/span><\/p>\n

    <\/span>6. Be patient<\/span><\/h2>\n

    Be patient, maintain eye contact and give your undivided attention to your partner while listening to what they have to say. Also, try not to interrupt while the other person is talking. <\/span><\/p>\n

    <\/span>7. Accept constructive criticism<\/span><\/h2>\n

    Ask yourself if what is being said to you is true and, if so, see it as an opportunity to grow. Use “I” rather than “you.” An example <\/span>of this would be, “I feel angry when<\/span> you leave your dirty dishes in the sink <\/span>and your dirty laundry on the floor” rather <\/span>than saying, “you are such a messy slob.” <\/span><\/p>\n

    Also watch:<\/strong> How to Avoid Common Relationship Mistakes<\/span><\/p>\n