

{"id":35060,"date":"2019-02-28T06:32:59","date_gmt":"2019-02-28T06:32:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=35060"},"modified":"2023-02-28T06:32:59","modified_gmt":"2023-02-28T06:32:59","slug":"overcoming-emotional-anxiety-after-your-husbands-affair","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/overcoming-emotional-anxiety-after-your-husbands-affair\/","title":{"rendered":"Overcoming Emotional Anxiety After Your Husband\u2019s Affair"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-3598 size-full\" title=\"Overcoming Emotional Anxiety After Your Husband&rsquo;s Affair\" src=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/relationship-anxiety.jpg\" alt=\"Overcoming Emotional Anxiety After Your Husband&rsquo;s Affair\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Infidelity is a nasty subject. It is taboo in most cultures for a simple reason. It is a selfish act that almost always end up hurting everyone involved. Grotesque <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.oxygen.com\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">crimes of passion<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> are plentiful and prevalent worldwide. It&rsquo;s an unnecessary risk for any society, which is why it&rsquo;s generally frowned upon in the modern world.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Let&rsquo;s assume that you are not the type to dismember junior to make a stand on infidelity, but instead decided to turn the other cheek. You will then have to carry the burden of overcoming the emotional anxiety after your husband&rsquo;s affair.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We&rsquo;re not saying that only men cheat, women too, and almost at the same frequency as men. According to a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.trustify.info\/blog\/infidelity-statistics-2018\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">study by Trustify<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, there&rsquo;s a significant number of women who have cheated at least once in their lifetime.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"One-day-at-a-time\"><\/span>One day at a time<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Time heals all wounds, but that wouldn&rsquo;t help you if the pain is deep and fresh. However, knowing there is light at the end of the long tunnel of forgiveness should give you hope. The first thing you need is, resolve. If you decide to forgive someone and suffer the consequence instead, then you have to walk all the way.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do or do not, there is no Try<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&rdquo; &ndash; Master Yoda.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Both maxims mean the same thing. If you invest your time and effort into it, then you have to finish it to get the reward. Otherwise, don&rsquo;t bother and save yourself the trouble. So if you forgive them and move on, start with <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/healing-from-infidelity\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">having the resolve to stick with it until the end<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There will be good days, bad days, and really bad days, and dealing with each day is a different challenge. On good days you will be able to go through your day normally unless some idiot reminded you about it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On really bad days, you just want to lock yourself up and cry, and most of the time, that&rsquo;s exactly what happens. We will only discuss how to deal with the really bad days. If you can get through that, you can breeze through the other days with ease.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Cry-your-heart-out\"><\/span>Cry your heart out<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<blockquote><p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Go ahead and cry, it helps to let out your feelings when you&rsquo;re alone. <\/span><\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It could prevent embarrassing public breakdowns that may add to your troubles. If friends and family are aware of the situation, have them come over and comfort you. Avoid people who can&rsquo;t keep a secret. The last thing you need is someone spreading your predicament behind you back, it will only add unnecessary stress and misery.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Stay-away-from-substance-abuse\"><\/span>Stay away from substance abuse<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Avoid addictive substances such as alcohol and medications as much as you can. Creating a new problem to solve one is counterproductive, but if it can&rsquo;t be helped, then try to do it in moderation.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do not do anything important, including driving motor vehicles when you feel like breaking down. Without the right frame of mind, you may accidentally do something that you might regret.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you are paralyzed by the overwhelming emotion and pain, repeat these words over and over until you are calm and composed enough to wipe away your tears.<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;I forgive him, I did it because I love him. The pain I feel is nothing, I feel pain because I am lucky to be alive and in love. This pain shall pass.&rdquo;<\/span><\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Distract-yourself\"><\/span>Distract yourself<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-35062 size-full\" title=\"Keeping yourself busy is the best way to make the days go by quickly\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Keeping-yourself-busy-is-the-best-way-to-make-the-days-go-by-quickly.jpg\" alt=\"Keeping yourself busy is the best way to make the days go by quickly\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Keeping yourself busy is the best way to make the days go by quickly. Thinking about things will not change anything. You cannot change the past, and you have already resolved to go through it until the end.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What you have to do now is to endure until enough time passes and the situation turns into &ldquo;something that happened in past.&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Work on your hobbies, clean the house (thoroughly), or watch movies to clear your head. Something physical is good for your health, &nbsp;and the strain keeps your brain occupied.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take up aerobics, zumba, or jogging. Make sure to shop for the proper attire and accessories. Read or watch online reviews for maximum comfort and safety. Shoes are very important.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here is a list of movies you can watch, that would help restore your faith in humanity and yourself (hopefully) without triggering a breakdown.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<ol><li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Forest Gump&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Pursuit of Happiness&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Blind Side&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Greatest Game Ever Played&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Miracle&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Coach Carter&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">13 going on 30&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Bucketlist&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Goal! (The first movie don&rsquo;t watch the second one)&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">School of Rock&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Family Man&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Devil Wears Prada&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stand and Deliver&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take the Lead&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Patch Adams&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Jerry McGuire&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Erin Brockovich&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Schindlers List&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lorenzo&rsquo;s Oil&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">My Sister&rsquo;s Keeper&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Eight Below&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Kung Fu Hustle<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Get-counseling\"><\/span>Get counseling<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Overcoming something like this with sheer willpower is hard, and sometimes you also can&rsquo;t trust your own circle of friends and family without having some sort of backlash on your husband or inviting unwanted gossip.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If that&rsquo;s the case, then you can go to a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">marriage therapist<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. You can be assured that everything will be kept confidential and avoid people meddling in your private business.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They can also provide more specific advice based on your case that can help you both. It doesn&rsquo;t matter if you come alone or with your husband, doing either will have different results so you may want to try each approach and see what works best for you.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Pamper-yourself\"><\/span>Pamper yourself<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<blockquote><p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The incident will no doubt hurt your pride as a woman and your self-esteem as a person, which means it&rsquo;s time for a makeover!<\/span><\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Don&rsquo;t even think about the cost, get the latest and most fashionable stuff out there today. Charge it to your husband&rsquo;s credit card. If he can afford another woman, he can afford to spend more on you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take a trip as a family, the one you&rsquo;ve always wanted to take. Bring the kids, it&rsquo;s not a good time to be alone with your husband, but it&rsquo;s an important time to be together as a family.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Overcoming-emotional-anxiety-being-cheated-on-is-possible\"><\/span>Overcoming emotional anxiety being cheated-on is possible<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Overcoming emotional anxiety after your husband&rsquo;s affair is difficult but not impossible. You can use that card for the first few months to get away with almost everything you want. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your husband truly cares about your relationship and is willing to do whatever it takes to bring back together, he will put up with it for a couple of months. Don&rsquo;t be spiteful, still be the nice loving wife that you always have been, just be more materialistic for a short time.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It will help cover up your anxieties until enough time has passed and you would have sufficiently recovered to begin the real work. Learning to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/5-tips-for-restoring-trust-after-infidelity\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">trust him all over again<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. But that&rsquo;s a whole different issue altogether.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Infidelity is a nasty subject. It is taboo in most cultures for a simple reason. It is a selfish act that almost always end up hurting everyone involved. Grotesque crimes of passion are plentiful and prevalent worldwide. It&rsquo;s an unnecessary risk for any society, which is why it&rsquo;s generally frowned upon in the modern world. Let&rsquo;s assume that you are not the type to dismember junior to make a stand on infidelity, but instead decided to turn the other cheek. You will then have to carry the burden of overcoming the emotional anxiety after your husband&rsquo;s affair. We&rsquo;re not saying <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1419,"featured_media":3598,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[23],"tags":[2692],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35060"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=35060"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35060\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":35064,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35060\/revisions\/35064"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3598"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=35060"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=35060"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=35060"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}