

{"id":33777,"date":"2019-02-04T11:52:30","date_gmt":"2019-02-04T11:52:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=33777"},"modified":"2025-12-23T09:45:50","modified_gmt":"2025-12-23T09:45:50","slug":"what-is-flirting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/what-is-flirting\/","title":{"rendered":"What Is Flirting: 11 Telling Signs They\u2019re Attracted to You"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-115048\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Flirting-moment.png\" alt=\"Flirting moment\" width=\"804\" height=\"536\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Flirting can feel exciting, confusing, or quietly reassuring&mdash;all at once. Sometimes it&rsquo;s obvious, like playful teasing or lingering eye contact; other times, it shows up in softer ways that make you pause and wonder, <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Is this something more?&rdquo;<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A smile held a second longer, a question asked with genuine curiosity, or a laugh that feels just a bit warmer than usual&hellip; these moments can carry meaning.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Understanding what is flirting isn&rsquo;t about overanalyzing every interaction; it&rsquo;s about noticing patterns, energy, and emotional cues that feel intentional.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When attraction is present, it often reveals itself through small, human behaviors&mdash;subtle signals that speak louder than words, even in silence.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What-is-flirting\"><\/span><b>What is flirting?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><b>Flirting is a social and sexual behavior involving spoken or written communication and body language by one person to another, <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">either to suggest interest in a deeper relationship with the other person or, if done playfully, for amusement.<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"research_highlight\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> A research paper published in <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/articles\/PMC10355297\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">2023<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> states that flirting involves intentional verbal and nonverbal cues that signal attraction, with meaning shaped by context, mutual perception, and social norms.<\/span><\/p><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"11-signs-that-someone-is-flirting-with-you\"><\/span><b>11 signs that someone is flirting with you<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, what is flirting? One way to know this is by understanding &ldquo;What are flirting examples?&rdquo; Here are some popular examples of flirting that might give you more clarity.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Prolonged eye contact<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is this person always making eye contact with you? Do they look you in the eye even when you are in a group? Do they prolong this eye contact for no reason?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/rossana-sida\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex and Relationship Therapist Dr. Rossana Sida<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> points out,<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When they maintain eye contact with you and give a sly, knowing smile, consider it an invitation to engage in the flirtation.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.frontiersin.org\/articles\/10.3389\/fpsyg.2019.01262\/full\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Eye contact<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> has a significant role when it comes to flirting. Eye contact establishes a great interest in someone. So,<\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">what does flirt mean? If someone maintains prolonged eye contact with you, chances are they are flirting with you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Staring too long without looking away<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Standing too close or invading personal space<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Not noticing discomfort like awkward silence or pulling back<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/types-of-eye-contact-attraction\/\" title=\"5 Types of Eye Contact Attraction and What They Mean\">5 Types of Eye Contact Attraction and What They Mean<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>2. They look at you even in a room full of people<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When someone is interested in you, and you are in a group, they will look at you first, especially when something funny or exciting happens. Have you seen them look at you, even in a crowded room? This is an example of flirting.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Staring at you repeatedly, even in a crowded room<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Nervous fidgeting with hair or clothes due to tension<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Attention that feels forced, not mutual<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>3. Playing with hair or clothing<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-115047\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Hair-twirling-flirt.png\" alt=\"Hair twirling flirt\" width=\"804\" height=\"536\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When talking to you, can they not stop fidgeting with their clothes or hair?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Toying with a sleeve or button or just flicking their hair is an example of someone flirting with you, especially when they do this with a smile. Such gestures can also indicate they are interested in knowing more about you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Fidgeting without smiling can signal nervousness, not flirting<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Touching hair or clothes repeatedly may show discomfort<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Avoiding eye contact while doing this can mean unease<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>4. High compliments<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If someone is trying to flirt with you, one of the first things they will do is pay you a compliment. This is great because it offers the recipient an ego boost while letting them know they&rsquo;re desired.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Compliments that feel exaggerated can seem insincere<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Praise given too quickly may create pressure<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Repeating compliments even when not welcomed can feel uncomfortable<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/compliments-for-women\/\" title=\"How to Compliment a Girl: 90+ Sweet and Genuine Examples\">How to Compliment a Girl: 90+ Sweet and Genuine Examples<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>5. Bringing attention to themselves<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are you wondering how to tell if someone is flirting with you? One considerable aspect of flirting has to do with body language.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"research_highlight\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> A research paper published in the<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/scholarsarchive.byu.edu\/intuition\/vol6\/iss1\/5\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Flirting with Psychology<\/span><\/a> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">states that flirting can be measured through behaviors like attention, playfulness, and communication patterns that signal romantic or social interest.<\/span><\/p><\/div>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many people will use many methods, from dressing differently to talking with their hands, to be noticed.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Overdoing gestures or outfits to demand attention<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Interrupting others often just to be noticed<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ignoring your reaction while showing off<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>6. Physical contact<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you like someone, you want to be closer to them. &ldquo;What is flirting with a girl or boy?&rdquo; is a question that can require pondering. Some studies suggest that the oxytocin released during physical forms of affection, such as holding hands or caressing, has been proven to lower stress.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Touch that isn&rsquo;t invited or feels sudden<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Standing too close without checking comfort<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Repeating contact after you pull away<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>7. Witty banter<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-115046\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Playful-teasing-flirt.png\" alt=\"Playful teasing flirt\" width=\"804\" height=\"536\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is banter flirting? One of the biggest ways someone will flirt with you is through witty banter. If you find yourself constantly drawn to the same person in conversations, you already know that your chemistry is out of this world.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If this person is flirting with you, they may strive to make you laugh or invariably come up with something witty to say to you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Jokes that feel forced or one-sided<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Trying too hard to impress every time<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Not stopping when humor isn&rsquo;t returned<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-make-a-girl-laugh\/\" title=\"How to Make a Girl Laugh: 13 Secrets No One Tells You\">How to Make a Girl Laugh: 13 Secrets No One Tells You<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>8. Schoolyard flirting<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Part of the reason why flirting can be so confusing is that sometimes, like a child poking fun at their crush in the schoolyard, flirting isn&rsquo;t always sweet.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If someone you know loves to tease and poke fun at you but still wants to be around you all the time, odds are they are flirting with you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Teasing that hurts instead of feels playful<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mocking sensitive topics about you<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Continuing jokes after you look uncomfortable<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>9. They change when you&rsquo;re in the room<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If someone becomes more attentive, tries hard to be funny, or acts completely different when you&rsquo;re around, they&rsquo;re probably love flirting with you and to get your attention.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Flirting is fun and exciting to let someone know you like them. You can even flirt with a long-time spouse to<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-do-you-spice-up-a-boring-relationship\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">spice up your relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Giving compliments, using suggestive body language, maintaining eye contact, and perking up around this person are all subtle signs of flirting.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Acting unnatural or tense around you<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Seeking attention constantly in your presence<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Shifting behavior in a way that feels awkward<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>10. They tease you<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One of the telltale signs of flirting is when they tease you. Do they pull your leg in front of your friends? Do they mock you jokingly?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Teasing someone to get a reaction can be a sign of<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/how-to-tell-if-a-married-man-is-flirting-with-you\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">flirting with someone<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. It also shows that they notice the little things about you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Teasing in public that embarrasses you<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Making jokes at your expense repeatedly<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ignoring boundaries when you don&rsquo;t laugh<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Watch this TED Talk by Francesca Hogi, a dating coach, who shares how confidence, self-awareness, and authenticity unlock flirting and connection.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/RXwQ7_hlL3g?si=eDAPv3mDjNjLcdhC\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">&#65279;<\/span><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h3><b>11. They hint at doing things with you<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If some activity or hang-out plan casually comes up, do they hint that you should join them, or do they make excuses to see you?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Then, it might be a clear sign that they are flirting with you. When people like someone, they want to ensure they spend time together.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>But, look out for<\/b><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Pressuring you to join plans<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Not accepting no easily<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Creating excuses that feel manipulative<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"FAQ\"><\/span><b>FAQ<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Understanding what is flirting, including the complexities of social interactions can sometimes leave us feeling uncertain. Below, we have answered some common questions surrounding flirting to help you understand the differences and key signs.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>What&rsquo;s the difference between flirting and being friendly?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Flirting involves expressing romantic or sexual interest through playful teasing and flirtatious behavior, while being friendly creates a warm and amicable atmosphere without any romantic intentions.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>How do I know if someone is flirting with me or just being nice?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Watch for signs like prolonged eye contact, physical touch, and compliments with a hint of flattery. Flirting usually carries a playful and flirtatious tone, while friendliness lacks these subtle hints.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>What if I don&rsquo;t like someone who is flirting with me?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Honesty is crucial. Clearly express your discomfort and set your boundaries with the person. If needed, involve a trusted friend or authority figure to handle the situation and address your concerns.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Reading-the-signs\"><\/span><b>Reading the signs<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Flirting is often a mix of small gestures, tone, and timing&mdash;it can feel light, exciting, or even confusing at times. Understanding what is flirting helps you notice genuine interest while also respecting comfort and boundaries. Not every smile or joke carries romantic meaning, and that&rsquo;s okay. <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What matters most is mutual energy and ease. When flirting feels natural, it adds warmth and connection; when it doesn&rsquo;t, listening to subtle cues makes all the difference. Paying attention to context, reactions, and respect allows attraction to grow in a healthy, meaningful way.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Flirting can feel exciting, confusing, or quietly reassuring&mdash;all at once. Sometimes it&rsquo;s obvious, like playful teasing or lingering eye contact; other times, it shows up in softer ways that make you pause and wonder, &ldquo;Is this something more?&rdquo;&nbsp; A smile held a second longer, a question asked with genuine curiosity, or a laugh that feels just a bit warmer than usual&hellip; these moments can carry meaning.&nbsp; Understanding what is flirting isn&rsquo;t about overanalyzing every interaction; it&rsquo;s about noticing patterns, energy, and emotional cues that feel intentional.&nbsp; When attraction is present, it often reveals itself through small, human behaviors&mdash;subtle signals that <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":675,"featured_media":115048,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[11],"tags":[2517],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33777"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/675"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33777"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33777\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":115049,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33777\/revisions\/115049"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/115048"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33777"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33777"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33777"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}