{"id":28076,"date":"2018-10-04T11:00:45","date_gmt":"2018-10-04T11:00:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=28076"},"modified":"2022-12-13T07:11:32","modified_gmt":"2022-12-13T07:11:32","slug":"dating-a-functional-alcoholic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/dating-a-functional-alcoholic\/","title":{"rendered":"10 Signs You\u2019re Dating a Functional Alcoholic & How to Cope"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\"How<\/p>\n

You might have noticed that your partner drinks a lot. More than most people drink.<\/span><\/p>\n

Do they seem to require alcohol for every date? Whether you are just cooking at home, spending a day at the beach, or meeting friends for board game night—they might always have a drink in their hand. <\/span><\/p>\n

Have you ever spent time with your partner when they haven’t got some alcoholic beverage at the ready?<\/span><\/p>\n

Despite their drinking, they might hold down a job, go through their day like anyone else, and seem responsible and reliable. However, do you suspect that they are what is known as a functional alcoholic?<\/span><\/p>\n

Here’s a look at how to know if you are dating a functional alcoholic and what you can do about it.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>What is a functional alcoholic?<\/b><\/span><\/h2>\n

A functional alcoholic definition is a person who appears to be living a normal life but has an alcohol addiction. <\/span><\/p>\n

If you are wondering, what is a functioning alcoholic, this is the same. It indicates that an individual has an issue with alcohol, but they can still function and do the things they need to do.<\/span><\/p>\n

They hold steady jobs and ties with friends, family, and the community. Yet they are dependent and some would say, addicted to alcohol.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

When you are dating a functional alcoholic, you don’t see them rip-roaring drunk or falling over from over-indulging, but they cannot go through their days without having alcohol in their system. There are around 15 <\/span>million<\/span><\/a> people in the United States that may have an issue with alcohol.<\/span><\/p>\n

Don’t ask them if they are addicted to alcohol.<\/span><\/p>\n

Part of the functional alcoholic’s discourse is denial. So, asking them if they think they have a problem with alcohol is pointless.<\/span><\/p>\n

Here are some signs for you to look for when evaluating if you are dating a functional alcoholic:<\/span><\/p>\n

  • They have to have at least three drinks a day.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • They might ask you to cover for them when they drink so much they suffer the after-effects. This may be asking you to call their work to say they are sick and can’t come in.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • They might ask to borrow money from you because they’ve blown their budget on alcohol. They may forget commitments to you or others because of their drinking.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • While they love a great social life, alcoholics do their serious drinking alone to hide the amount they drink daily.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • Functional alcoholics are often moody and on edge due to having to hide the need to drink or the after-effects of having drunk.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • When you comment or ask them to cut back on their drinking, they will accuse you of trying to control them or say that you are the one with the problem, that it’s “just a beer or two, no big deal.”<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>

    \"Don’t<\/p>\n

    <\/span>Alcoholism is a progressive addiction<\/b><\/span><\/h2>\n

    You may think that “my boyfriend is an alcoholic” or “I’m married to a high-functioning alcoholic,” and there haven’t been any repercussions that you have had to face so far.<\/span><\/p>\n

    When dating a functional alcoholic, you may love your partner so much that you may want to practice closing your eyes to the issue in front of you.<\/span><\/p>\n

    This can be easy to do because perhaps their drinking has not yet reached the point where they have critical consequences that affect their lives.<\/span><\/p>\n

    You tell yourself they still have a job, or a home, haven’t been pulled over for any DUIs, and your <\/span>relationship is pretty good<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

    You should know that as this disease progresses, your partner will likely face a downward spiral, which may include job loss, growing debt, health effects, and a deterioration of all of their relationships.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

    A relationship with an alcoholic can never remain problem free forever, no matter how your partner may be right now.<\/span><\/p>\n

    For more information on alcoholism, you can watch this video:<\/span><\/p>\n