{"id":26037,"date":"2018-08-01T09:49:16","date_gmt":"2018-08-01T09:49:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=26037"},"modified":"2023-04-24T12:15:19","modified_gmt":"2023-04-24T12:15:19","slug":"six-month-separation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/separation\/six-month-separation\/","title":{"rendered":"Six-Month Separation \u2013 How to Make It Work"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\"Many<\/p>\n

Many couples nowadays engage in a therapist-guided and mediated six-month separation, aimed to restore the relationship. <\/span><\/p>\n

Separation used to be a scary word, as it meant that the two had basically divorced. <\/span><\/p>\n

But, as many couples discovered on their own, and as the psychology reveals us, some time apart can, in fact, bring the couple back together. Nonetheless, there are good and bad ways to do it.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>When is the perfect time for a six-month separation?<\/b><\/span><\/h2>\n

The short answer is – there isn’t a universally perfect timing for such a decision. <\/span><\/p>\n

All couples are different. All individuals involved in the relationship are different. And all the problems that make their marriages falling apart are different. But, most importantly, not all marriages will benefit from (or be saved by) such therapeutic separation.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

There are many couples whose problems don’t require a separation. They wouldn’t even gain anything from such a radical move. Six-month separation is ideal for those couples who already tried everything else. For those who just can’t communicate well anymore, especially for those who only seem to exchange insults. <\/span><\/p>\n

Or, for marriages where an affair has shaken their very foundations and remaining together all the time only adds to the struggles.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ideally, the separation will occur somewhere in-between trying other, less invasive means to mend the broken relationship and the moment when there is nothing else to save. <\/span><\/p>\n

How to tell when that is? This is where a therapist steps in. <\/span><\/p>\n

Upon individual and joined sessions with the couple, a therapist will assess the pros and cons, and recommend a separation when the time is right.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

<\/span>The rules of a therapeutic six-month separation<\/b><\/span><\/h2>\n

\"Not<\/p>\n

Not all separations will be therapeutic for the couple, although all of them have the potential to be. <\/span><\/p>\n

What makes the difference between a beneficial and a definite separation is how the time apart is spent. If used to constructively revisit the issues in the marriage that caused friction (or downright mayhem), separation can be the best thing that has happened to the couple. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

However, if things are left to inertia or made worse by any means, it can, indeed, be the final step before a divorce. This is why a professional guidance is advised.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ideally, the rules will be discussed with a therapist or a mediator prior to the separation. <\/span><\/p>\n

Both spouses will directly express their expectations of the process and declare what they hope to achieve as the end result. What should be openly talked about is the frequency, the means, and the form of communication during the separation. The same goes for whether and how the spouses will be seeing each other.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

One of the most common and usually the first thing that gets discussed is – other people. <\/span><\/p>\n

Romantically, sexually, or mere getting to know other men and women. Separation is not a divorce. It does not remove the vows the couple has committed to. Although, in rare cases and only when both partners agree, this is also an option. <\/span><\/p>\n

As with other tenets of this therapeutic move, the point is in the mutual agreement between the spouses.<\/span><\/p>\n

Also watch: Top 6 Reasons Why Your Marriage Is Falling Apart<\/span><\/p>\n