

{"id":20522,"date":"2018-01-03T09:18:55","date_gmt":"2018-01-03T09:18:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=20522"},"modified":"2023-03-21T09:41:30","modified_gmt":"2023-03-21T09:41:30","slug":"couples-counseling-and-why-its-so-important","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/counseling\/couples-counseling-and-why-its-so-important\/","title":{"rendered":"10 Reasons Couples Counseling Is Essential for a Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-20556 size-full\" title=\"Why is it important to have couples counseling\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/Why-is-it-important-to-have-couples-counseling.png\" alt=\"Why is it important to have couples counseling\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Two people meet. Two people fall in love. Two people get married.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As those two people start their life together, there are inevitable events that will test their resolve. There will be hurt feelings, tough conversations, and potential resentment to follow.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As these roadblocks materialize, it&rsquo;s important that couples don&rsquo;t turn a blind eye to it. It&rsquo;s important that they set their ego aside and seek the help that they really need.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Finding a counselor<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that can give perspective, advice, and tools to work through the issues is one of the best things you can do for your marriage if you find that your love is on the rocks.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What-does-couples-counseling-do\"><\/span><b>What does couples counseling do?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Wondering, &ldquo;What is couples counseling?&rdquo;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Couples counseling, also known as couples therapy, is a form of psychotherapy that helps couples <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/steps-to-resolve-conflict-with-your-partner\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">resolve conflicts<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, improve communication, rebuild trust, address individual issues, strengthen their relationship, and prevent future problems.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The goal is to provide a safe and supportive space for couples to work through their issues and develop new skills and strategies to improve their relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Why-is-couples-counseling-essential-for-a-healthy-relationship\"><\/span><b>Why is couples counseling essential for a healthy relationship?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Couples counseling is essential for a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/what-is-the-definition-of-a-healthy-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">healthy relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> as it helps couples improve communication, resolve conflicts, rebuild trust, address personal issues, strengthen their relationship, and prevent future problems.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Through counseling, couples can learn new skills and strategies to improve their relationship, leading to greater intimacy and a stronger bond. By addressing issues early on, couples can prevent them from escalating and damaging the relationship, ultimately leading to a healthier and happier relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"10-reasons-why-couple-counseling-is-important\"><\/span><b>10 reasons why couple counseling is important?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Couples counseling, also known as couples therapy, is a form of psychotherapy designed to help couples resolve conflicts and improve their relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The goal is to help couples understand and manage their emotions, communicate more effectively, and develop stronger bonds. Here are 10 reasons for couples therapy:<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. You get amazing perspective<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The biggest advantage of having a couples counselor work with you and your spouse is that they can provide some amazing perspective to your situation. While you and your partner are at each other&rsquo;s throats, they can observe what&rsquo;s really going on.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you&rsquo;re entrenched in the thick of your disagreements and consumed by your disconnection, a counselor can be a pair of fresh eyes to help you get to the bottom of the problem.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Along with just being a new set of eyes to objectively observe the issues at hand, they have experience in helping couples just like yours. Well, each couple is different in their own way, but you get the idea.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They have likely seen couples from all walks of life present problems that are similar to the ones you&rsquo;re currently experiencing. They can pull from that experience to better assist you. Since you likely only have your current understanding of your relationship, this outside expertise will be an incredible advantage.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>2. You get helpful objective advice<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you and your partner are fighting or are feeling disconnected, you are likely to seek advice from outside parties. You&rsquo;ll reach out to your best friend and hope that they can give a little helpful advice.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your partner will go to their parent&rsquo;s house to see how they can help. It&rsquo;s important that you do this so that you&rsquo;re not just stuck in your own train of thought, but your friends and family will likely sprinkle some bias all over their advice.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Since a couples counselor doesn&rsquo;t know you, your history, or anything else that might make them favor you or your partner, they are the perfect confidant to entrust you with your guidance.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They will have enough distance from your life that they can actively engage in your <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/8-common-problems-in-married-life\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">marital issues<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and help solve them without playing favorites.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You don&rsquo;t want to know what your mother-in-law has to say about your marriage. Your partner doesn&rsquo;t want to hear what your best friend has to offer, either.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Having an objective counselor oversee the process of you and your partner working through everything will make you both more readily engaged in it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-146\" src=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/Pre-Marriage-Counselling-Questions-to-Answer-Before-Saying-I-Do.jpg\" alt=\"Pre-Marriage Counselling Questions to Answer Before Saying I Do \" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. You get tools and methods<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Any couples counselor worthy of your investment will make your experience continue outside of their office. Their job isn&rsquo;t just to moderate and facilitate helpful conversation in their presence. They also give you tips and tools to take home and use throughout your day.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They may give you some conversational approaches that will help improve your marriage communication.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They may give you some &ldquo;homework&rdquo; that involves attempting to reconnect in bed. They may even suggest some helpful daily routines that will make your attempt at improving the relationship more conscious.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Whatever methods they provide are nuggets of gold that you can continue to use even after you walk out of their office for the last time. These tips could be the foundation that you build your new and improved marriage on.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Confined to a safe place<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is safe to say that what you and your spouse share with your counselor in their office space stays there. It will be treated with respect, and whatever transpired there will not reach others.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In addition to that, it is an open and safe forum for you to feel free to speak your heart out without being subjected to judgment. The best marriage counselors and therapists are the ones who show no judgment or critique in reaction to what you share with them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you are with a good counselor, you and your spouse will be able to freely speak and discuss without holding back anything. With <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/open-communication-in-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">open communication<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and ease of speech, you will get a good headway to repairing the damage in your strained relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You will need to follow certain ground rules for how you communicate, but the focal point would be to get your feelings out in a free-flowing manner, safely and without being subjected to harsh judgment.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>5. Improved communication<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One of the primary benefits of couples therapy is improved communication. Couples who have difficulty communicating with each other can benefit greatly from counseling sessions.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A counselor can teach the couple how to listen to each other without interrupting, express their feelings in a non-threatening manner, and respond to each other in a respectful way.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Couples who learn these skills can improve their ability to communicate with each other and resolve conflicts more effectively.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/effective-relationship-communication-skills\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">10 Effective Communication Skills in Relationships<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>6. Resolving conflicts<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another important benefit of couples counseling is <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC4844469\/#:~:text=Various%20sources%2C%20such%20as%20incompatible,conflicts%20in%20marriages%20(13).\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">resolving conflicts<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Every couple has disagreements from time to time, but when these disagreements escalate into arguments, it can damage the relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A counselor can help the couple identify the underlying issues that are causing the conflict and work with them to develop solutions. By learning how to resolve conflicts in a healthy way, couples can avoid damaging the relationship and build a stronger bond.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>7. Rebuilding trust<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Trust is an essential component of any <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/what-is-the-definition-of-a-healthy-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">healthy relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and when it is broken, it can be difficult to repair. Couples who have experienced infidelity or other forms of betrayal can benefit from counseling sessions to rebuild trust.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A counselor can help the couple work through their feelings and develop strategies to rebuild trust. By addressing the issues that led to the breach of trust and learning how to communicate and support each other, couples can move forward and strengthen their relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-66549\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/coupel-talking-1.jpg\" alt=\"Man and woman talking seriously about their opinions\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h3><b>8. Addressing individual issues<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Couples counseling can also help each individual in the relationship address their personal issues. Often, relationship problems stem from underlying personal issues such as <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/mental-health\/how-do-you-know-you-have-anxiety\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">anxiety<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, depression, or trauma.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A counselor can help each person identify and address these issues, which can lead to a stronger and healthier relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>9. Strengthening the relationship<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Couples counseling can help strengthen the relationship by providing a safe and supportive space for the couple to explore their feelings and work on their issues.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Through counseling sessions, couples can learn new skills and strategies to improve their relationship, which can lead to greater intimacy and a stronger bond.<\/span><\/p>\n<pre><b><i>Related Reading: <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-strengthen-your-relationship-connection\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to Strengthen Your Relationship Connection<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/pre>\n<h3><b>10. Preventing future problems<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Finally, couples counseling can be helpful in preventing future problems. By addressing current issues and learning how to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/communicating-with-your-husband\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">communicate effectively<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, couples can build a foundation for healthier relationships in the future.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Counseling can also help couples identify potential issues before they become major problems, allowing them to address them early on and prevent them from escalating.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Can-couples-counseling-save-a-relationship\"><\/span><b>Can couples counseling save a relationship?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Yes, couples counseling can save a relationship by providing a safe and supportive space for couples to work through their issues.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, does counseling help couples? Is couples therapy helpful? Does couples therapy work? By improving communication, resolving conflicts, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/save-your-marriage\/rebuild-trust-in-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">rebuilding trust<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, addressing personal issues, and strengthening the relationship, couples can develop new skills and strategies to improve their relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Through counseling, couples can prevent issues from escalating and damaging the relationship, ultimately leading to a healthier and happier relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"More-questions-on-couples-counseling\"><\/span><b>More questions on couples counseling<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Couples counseling can be extremely beneficial for couples. Check out these questions to understand it further:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>What percentage of couples stay together after counseling?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The success rate of couples counseling can vary depending on various factors such as the severity of the issues and the commitment of both partners to the process.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/onlinelibrary.wiley.com\/doi\/abs\/10.1111\/j.1752-0606.2011.00249.x\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">research suggests<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that about 70% of couples who participate in couples counseling report improvement in their relationship, and about 50% of couples report significant improvement that lasts even after therapy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Check out this video where Susan L. Adler spills the beans on the secrets of a healthy relationship:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/TUMmLkFKpEI\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">&#65279;<\/span><\/iframe><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>What not to say in couples counseling?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When participating in couples counseling, it is important to be mindful of what you say in order to create a safe and productive environment for both partners. Here are some things to avoid saying during couples counseling:<\/span><\/p>\n<ol><li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Blaming or criticizing your partner<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Using hurtful language or insults<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Interrupting your partner or not allowing them to speak<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Dismissing your partner&rsquo;s feelings or concerns<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Refusing to take responsibility for your own actions<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Making threats or ultimatums<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Bringing up past issues that have already been resolved<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Not actively listening to your partner&rsquo;s perspective<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Takeaway\"><\/span><b>Takeaway<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you got married, you made a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/do-not-want-to-walk-down-the-aisle-to-these-men\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">lifelong commitment<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Remember those vows? <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death do us part.&rdquo;<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If times get tough and your marriage is slowly falling apart, you owe it to yourself and your partner to invest in the peace of mind that a couples counselor can offer. They&rsquo;re not there to judge you or make you feel like you did anything wrong.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you think, &ldquo;Is <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/counseling\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relationship <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">counseling<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> worth it?&rdquo; They&rsquo;re simply there to help you and your spouse figure things out. When two people decide to build a life together, they are bound to run into some problems along the way. You shouldn&rsquo;t feel bad about acknowledging the imperfections and trying to fix them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your marriage is coming apart at the seams, find a counselor near you to stitch it back up.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Two people meet. Two people fall in love. Two people get married. As those two people start their life together, there are inevitable events that will test their resolve. There will be hurt feelings, tough conversations, and potential resentment to follow. As these roadblocks materialize, it&rsquo;s important that couples don&rsquo;t turn a blind eye to it. It&rsquo;s important that they set their ego aside and seek the help that they really need. Finding a counselor that can give perspective, advice, and tools to work through the issues is one of the best things you can do for your marriage if <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1419,"featured_media":20556,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[15],"tags":[2666],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20522"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20522"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20522\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":84558,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20522\/revisions\/84558"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20556"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20522"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20522"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20522"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}