

{"id":18135,"date":"2017-09-29T12:00:17","date_gmt":"2017-09-29T12:00:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=18135"},"modified":"2026-07-10T06:43:38","modified_gmt":"2026-07-10T06:43:38","slug":"3-tips-for-better-sex-in-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/3-tips-for-better-sex-in-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Improve Sex Life in Marriage: 20 Tips"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-72704\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/how-to-have-better-sex-in-marriage-.jpg\" alt=\"Happy morning of young couple\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If sex has become less frequent or less satisfying in your marriage, you&rsquo;re not alone, and it doesn&rsquo;t mean something is broken beyond repair. Many couples hit a stretch where intimacy feels routine or distant, often without any single clear cause.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Learning how to improve sex life in marriage usually comes down to small, consistent changes rather than one dramatic fix: better communication, a bit more comfort with each other, and a willingness to shake up your routine.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Physical intimacy tends to develop naturally early on, but the spark can fade over time if it&rsquo;s left unattended. With genuine effort, it can be rediscovered. The tips ahead can help you find your way back to each other.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Why-Is-Sex-Important-In-A-Marriage\"><\/span><b>Why Is Sex Important In A Marriage?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex is often a human need. However, it is not just about the need or the fun of the activity. Sex is associated with a healthy body and mind.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Every orgasm is known to release oxytocin, which is also known as the love hormone.<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"research_highlight\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> A research paper published in the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/8528580_Hormonal_changes_when_falling_in_love\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Journal of Clinical Medicine <\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">states that oxytocin levels often rise during sexual activity and orgasm, suggesting a role in sexual arousal, pleasure, and partner bonding, although more research is needed.<\/span><\/p><\/div>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex also improves intimacy and promotes cuddling and snuggling, which are likely to make you feel closer to your partner. Sex tips that make sex better for you and your partner can help you improve your physical and mental health.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5-Signs-Of-A-Healthy-Sex-Life\"><\/span><b>5 Signs Of A Healthy Sex Life<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-68065\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/couple-in-bed.jpg\" alt=\"Happy couple hiding under white covers in the bedroom\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To understand how to improve sex life in marriage, you might have to understand the place that sex holds in a relationship. It is an important aspect of most relationships, and a complacent attitude towards it can harm the relationship in the long run.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Partners in a marriage should evaluate their relationship and address any gaps in their intimate connection to ensure mutual satisfaction. These signs can allow you to determine whether healthy sex with your wife or husband is maintained in your relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. You can express your desires<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Healthy sexuality in marriage becomes obvious <\/span><b>when both partners can express their sexual desires and needs to their partner.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> It is a mark of comfort and a healthy communication pattern.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">By expressing what you need to improve for your sexual satisfaction, you can guide your partner about what you truly need. It can improve your sexual understanding of each other, instead of allowing assumptions to lead you in the wrong direction.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/what-makes-a-man-desire-a-woman-sexually\/\" title=\"What Makes a Man Desire a Woman: 10 Things\">What Makes a Man Desire a Woman: 10 Things<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>2. You feel confident about your body<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Great sex in marriage can help you<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-feel-more-confident-in-relationship\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">feel more confident<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> about yourself and your body.<\/span><b> It can boost your confidence and curb the insecurities that might plague you.&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. You change things when required<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/how-to-have-more-sex-in-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Married sex life<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is healthier when <\/span><b>the couple actively tries to keep changing things as per their sexual needs and desires<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. The openness to change can stop complacency or sexual misunderstandings from negatively affecting the relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. You have fun together<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><b>Married sex life is better when both partners have fun and enjoy having sex with each other<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. When it is better for marital sex, it is not a task. Instead, the couple explores more ways to relish having sex with their spouse.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/10-reasons-to-have-sex-frequently-with-your-spouse\/\" title=\"21 Benefits of Sex in Marriage for Better Health\">21 Benefits of Sex in Marriage for Better Health<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>5. You make plans&nbsp;<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex during marriage might not always be spontaneous, <\/span><b>but if both partners try to schedule sex from time to time, they can make sure that complacency doesn&rsquo;t destroy their sex life<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Instead of waiting for the perfect moment for sex, they take the initiative and create it for themself.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"How-To-Improve-Sex-Life-In-Marriage-20-Tips\"><\/span><b>How To Improve Sex Life In Marriage: 20 Tips<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Now that you know the many health benefits of sex and its importance in a happy and healthy marriage, it is time to think about how to get better at sex.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Maybe you and your spouse have hit a roadblock when it comes to sex life in marriage, or maybe you just wish to spice things up in the bedroom. Either way, these sex tips for a better sex life can help you.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Tell them how to turn you on<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Turning your partner on is the first step of what makes sex better. Talk to your partner, and tell them what you like and what turns you on.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/jenni-jacobsen\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dr. Jennifer Jacobsen<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, Ph.D. in Psychology, says, as with other areas of a relationship, communication plays a primary role in a healthy sex life.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This makes things easier for them and helps them enjoy sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Share one thing you enjoy before intimacy, and encourage your partner to tell you one thing they like too.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>2. Turn chores into foreplay<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Engaging in shared activities, like helping with household chores, can foster connection and even add a playful, romantic twist to your day.<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"research_highlight\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In a study of more than 1<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/onlinelibrary.wiley.com\/doi\/abs\/10.1111\/jomf.12313\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">,300 couples from the National Survey of Families<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and Households, Carlson, Miller, Sassler, and Hanson found that couples who shared housework more equally were just as sexually active and satisfied as those with traditional divisions of labor.<\/span><\/p><\/div>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Tackle one household task together, then reward yourselves with uninterrupted time to relax and reconnect afterward.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/foreplay-ideas-spice-up-your-life\/\" title=\"33 Sizzling Foreplay Ideas for Couples to Heat up Your Love Life\">33 Sizzling Foreplay Ideas for Couples to Heat up Your Love Life<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>3. Do not worry about penetrative sex<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some people worry a lot about penetrative sex, and that worry itself can create enough stress to affect performance. Try not to worry about it so much. When you do not stress about it, it is likely to happen in the best way.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Focus on enjoying touch, kissing, or massage without making penetration the goal every time.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>4. Check your diet<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What you eat can greatly impact your sex drive and how you perform in bed. Checking your diet and including foods that help you boost your stamina and<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/reasons-of-no-sex-drive-in-your-marriage\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sex drive<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is one of the most important tips for better sex.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Good sex in marriage is possible if you have foods rich in proteins and antioxidants that help boost your sexual performance.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Add more fruits, vegetables, nuts, and lean proteins to your meals, and stay hydrated to support your overall health and energy.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>5. Take your time undressing<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-72705\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/turn-chores-into-foreplay.jpg\" alt=\"Cute couple in a bedroom. Lady in a white t-shirt. Pair at home\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your partner may enjoy the process of undressing you, which might boost the sexual experience for both of you. One of the ways to have better sex is to be sexy but slow with the process of undressing. It might help release more oxytocin and lead to more passion between the sheets.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Slow things down by undressing each other gradually while maintaining eye contact and enjoying the anticipation.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>6. Make it last<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many people are unaware of how long sex should be and often think their partners have unrealistic expectations of them.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"research_highlight\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> According to a<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/18331255\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">study,<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp; sex therapists state that a desirable length of time for sex to last is between 7 and 13 minutes.&nbsp; If you make sessions last about this long, it will likely be the most enjoyable for you and your partner.<\/span><\/p><\/div>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Spend more time on kissing, touching, and cuddling instead of rushing into intercourse.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>7. Watch porn together<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A popular misconception is that couples cannot enjoy watching porn together.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Consider exploring shared experiences that help you discover each other&rsquo;s preferences, such as trying new media or activities that align with both your comfort levels. It can increase your comfort levels and help you find out what you want to try in the bedroom.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> If you are both comfortable, choose content together and pause to discuss what you like or do not like before trying anything new.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>8. Take control of your breath<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When they train you for a sport, one of the most important things they teach you is to take control of your breath. Breathing is one of the most essential better sex techniques. It helps you last in bed longer and keeps up your stamina.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Take slow, deep breaths together for a minute before intimacy to help you relax and stay present.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>9. Turn the lights on<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have you heard that some people are more visual than others?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/articles\/PMC2739403\/\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Research <\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">suggests that many people, especially men, are visually stimulated, making the ambiance and lighting an important factor in intimacy. This is especially true for men. Because of this, it only makes sense to leave the lights on during sex to heighten the experience.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> If bright lights feel uncomfortable, use a warm bedside lamp or dim lighting so you can still see and connect with each other.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>10. Increase intimacy<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Increasing<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/4-essential-tips-to-improve-physical-intimacy-in-a-marriage\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">physical intimacy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is directly linked with emotional intimacy. Give your spouse enough time, talk to them, take them out on dates, and keep the romance alive. This is likely to reflect in your sex life as well.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dr. Jacobsen says people often think that sex is just about physical gratification, but emotional intimacy outside of the bedroom can have a profound impact on a couple&rsquo;s sex life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you wonder how to make sex better, focusing on intimacy is one of the most critical steps.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Spend at least 15 minutes each day talking without distractions or sharing a simple affectionate gesture like a hug or kiss.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>11. Speak openly and have a productive sex conversation<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Having an open, honest conversation about your<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/healthy-sex-life\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sex life<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is vital. That&rsquo;s one of the simplest tips for better sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex can improve in any relationship, but both must voice their needs without embarrassment. Being vocal about needs is one of the key tips for better sex and a happy relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Choose a calm moment outside the bedroom to talk about one thing you enjoy and one thing you would like to explore together.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>12. Try your best to look and taste great<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some people are known to enjoy oral sex. However, some factors, including bad hygiene, can make it less pleasurable for you and your partner.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Try your best to look great for your partner and maintain good hygiene. Then, when they enjoy it, you will likely feel more comfortable and enjoy it too!<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Shower beforehand, brush your teeth, and wear something that helps you feel clean, comfortable, and confident.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>13. Listen<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your partner will also have specific things they like, and listening to these can solve half your problems. If you wonder how to perform better in bed, the answer might lie with your partner.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Listen to your spouse about what they like to do and what they enjoy being done to them. This will help you make them feel more loved and appreciated between the sheets.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Ask your partner, &ldquo;What makes you feel most loved during intimacy?&rdquo; and listen without interrupting or judging.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>14. Create a mood &nbsp; <\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-72706\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/turn-the-lights-on.jpg\" alt=\"Woman sitting on bed with her husband holding a coffee cup and kissing him\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Good music, nice-smelling candles, dim lights &ndash; all scream a good night of intimacy! Create a mood and see that you feel more confident, in love, and passionate about having sex with your partner. When both of you are into it, there is little chance that something will go wrong.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Put on a favorite playlist, dim the lights, or light a scented candle to make the space feel more inviting.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>15. Experiment with positions<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Discuss with your partner about trying new approaches or ideas in intimacy to discover what works best for both of you. Trying new positions can also help spice things up for him and will keep you both on your toes, sometimes, literally.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Pick one new position to try together and talk afterward about what felt most comfortable and enjoyable.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>16. Ask your partner to touch you everywhere<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Touching with a lubricant such as oil can help boost a person&rsquo;s sex drive.<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/intimacy\/intimate-questions-to-ask-your-partner\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ask your partner<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to touch your body, especially where you like being touched. This will likely turn you on and make better married sex a reality.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Gently guide your partner&rsquo;s hand or tell them which kinds of touch feel best for you.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>17. Identify your needs<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is essential to communicate your needs to your partner. However, to be able to do that, you need to identify them first. Knowing what you want sexually helps you ask for it and enjoy sex more. So, if you want to be better at sex, identify your sexual needs.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can enter into<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/counseling\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">marital counseling<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to better understand your sexual needs and how to achieve these with your partner.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Take a few minutes to think about what helps you feel desired, comfortable, and connected before discussing it with your partner.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Watch this TED Talk by Jonathan Ljungqvist, a communication coach, who shares practical habits to strengthen love, deepen connection, and build a happier relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/DSmvNVSXIKs?si=ZHalXO3i96HxoZCv\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">&#65279;<\/span><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h3><b>18. Take charge<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One of the essential answers to how to improve sex life in marriage is to take the initiative in expressing your desire for intimacy, creating moments of connection and closeness with your partner. There is nothing wrong with wanting sex and asking your partner for it.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many people find it sexy when their partner takes charge. So, improving sex in marriage is possible if you take the initiative.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Plan the next date night or be the one to initiate a kiss, cuddle, or intimate moment when the mood feels right.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h3><b>19. Stay healthy<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Staying healthy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is one of the ways to be better at sex. You will likely show it in the bedroom when you feel healthy and happy about your body. So get comfortable with your body and maintain good physical and mental health for better sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Try:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Aim for regular exercise, nutritious meals, and enough sleep, as these habits can improve your energy, mood, and intimacy.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Mistakes-to-Avoid-When-Trying-to-Improve-Sex-Life-in-Marriage\"><\/span><b>Mistakes to Avoid When Trying to Improve Sex Life in Marriage<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Trying to know how to improve sex life in marriage sometimes fails not from lack of effort, but from a few common habits that quietly get in the way. Watch out for these five mistakes.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Waiting for spontaneity instead of planning intimacy.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Spontaneous moments get rarer as life gets busier, and waiting around for them often means intimacy just doesn&rsquo;t happen.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Avoiding the conversation about mismatched desire.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Staying silent about differing needs breeds resentment over time, while naming it early usually opens the door to solutions.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Comparing your sex life to other couples.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Every relationship has its own rhythm, and measuring yours against someone else&rsquo;s usually just creates unnecessary pressure and doubt.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Letting resentment from unrelated conflicts spill into the bedroom.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Unresolved arguments about chores or money can quietly kill desire if they&rsquo;re never addressed on their own terms.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Assuming a dip in desire means something is wrong.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Desire naturally fluctuates with stress, health, and life stage, and a temporary lull rarely signals a deeper problem.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"FAQs\"><\/span><b>FAQs<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to improve sex life in marriage? Sex is an important part of most relationships that can cause significant discontent if not given importance. If your marriage is going through some sexual problems, here are some key questions and their answers that can assist you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<style>#sp-ea-121909 .spcollapsing { height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition-property: height;transition-duration: 300ms;}#sp-ea-121909.sp-easy-accordion>.sp-ea-single {border: 1px solid #e2e2e2; }#sp-ea-121909.sp-easy-accordion>.sp-ea-single>.ea-header a {color: #444;}#sp-ea-121909.sp-easy-accordion>.sp-ea-single>.sp-collapse>.ea-body {background: #fff; color: #444;}#sp-ea-121909.sp-easy-accordion>.sp-ea-single {background: #eee;}#sp-ea-121909.sp-easy-accordion>.sp-ea-single>.ea-header a .ea-expand-icon.fa { float: left; color: #444;font-size: 16px;}<\/style><div id=\"sp-ea-121909\" class=\"sp-ea-one sp-easy-accordion\" data-ex-icon=\"fa-angle-up\" data-col-icon=\"fa-angle-down\"  data-ea-active=\"ea-click\"  data-ea-mode=\"vertical\" data-preloader=\"\" data-scroll-active-item=\"\" data-offset-to-scroll=\"0\"><div class=\"ea-card ea-expand sp-ea-single\"><h3 class=\"ea-header\"><a class=\"collapsed\" data-sptoggle=\"spcollapse\" data-sptarget=#collapse1219090 href=\"javascript:void(0)\"  aria-expanded=\"true\"><i class=\"ea-expand-icon fa fa-angle-up\"><\/i> What causes a lack of sex in a marriage?<\/a><\/h3><div class=\"sp-collapse spcollapse collapsed show\" id=\"collapse1219090\" data-parent=#sp-ea-121909><div class=\"ea-body\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A lack of sex in marriage usually comes from a mix of interpersonal and physical factors rather than a single cause. Unresolved conflict, resentment, complacency, or simply losing touch with each other over time are common interpersonal reasons.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Medical factors matter too: age-related hormonal changes, certain medications, and underlying health conditions can all lower desire. Because the causes vary so much, identifying what's actually going on in your relationship matters more than comparing yourselves to a \"normal\" frequency that doesn't really exist. <\/span><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"ea-card  sp-ea-single\"><h3 class=\"ea-header\"><a class=\"collapsed\" data-sptoggle=\"spcollapse\" data-sptarget=#collapse1219091 href=\"javascript:void(0)\"  aria-expanded=\"false\"><i class=\"ea-expand-icon fa fa-angle-down\"><\/i> Is it normal to lose your sex drive in a marriage?<\/a><\/h3><div class=\"sp-collapse spcollapse \" id=\"collapse1219091\" data-parent=#sp-ea-121909><div class=\"ea-body\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Yes, it's normal for sex drive to fluctuate throughout a marriage, and a temporary dip usually isn't a cause for alarm. Stress, health changes, parenting demands, and relationship dynamics can all lower desire for a while.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dr. Jacobsen adds, fortunately, underlying issues related to lack of sexual desire can typically be resolved.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It becomes more of a concern if desire disappears completely for an extended period without an obvious cause.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"ea-card  sp-ea-single\"><h3 class=\"ea-header\"><a class=\"collapsed\" data-sptoggle=\"spcollapse\" data-sptarget=#collapse1219092 href=\"javascript:void(0)\"  aria-expanded=\"false\"><i class=\"ea-expand-icon fa fa-angle-down\"><\/i> How can married couples improve communication in the bedroom?<\/a><\/h3><div class=\"sp-collapse spcollapse \" id=\"collapse1219092\" data-parent=#sp-ea-121909><div class=\"ea-body\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Improving communication in the bedroom starts with talking about desires and boundaries outside of the bedroom first, when neither partner feels pressure or vulnerability in the moment.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Simple habits, like telling your partner what feels good in the moment or checking in afterward about what worked, build comfort over time. The goal isn't a single perfect conversation but an ongoing, low-pressure dialogue that gets easier the more you practice it. <\/span><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"ea-card  sp-ea-single\"><h3 class=\"ea-header\"><a class=\"collapsed\" data-sptoggle=\"spcollapse\" data-sptarget=#collapse1219093 href=\"javascript:void(0)\"  aria-expanded=\"false\"><i class=\"ea-expand-icon fa fa-angle-down\"><\/i> What are some intimacy tips for married couples with busy schedules?<\/a><\/h3><div class=\"sp-collapse spcollapse \" id=\"collapse1219093\" data-parent=#sp-ea-121909><div class=\"ea-body\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Married couples with busy schedules can protect intimacy by scheduling it deliberately rather than waiting for spontaneity, which often doesn't come on its own during demanding periods.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Even short windows work: a 15-minute check-in before bed, a planned date night once a week, or simply going to bed at the same time consistently.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What matters most is treating intimacy as a priority worth protecting, not something that only happens when everything else is handled first. Couples who plan for it tend to report a more consistent connection than those who wait for the perfect moment.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"ea-card  sp-ea-single\"><h3 class=\"ea-header\"><a class=\"collapsed\" data-sptoggle=\"spcollapse\" data-sptarget=#collapse1219094 href=\"javascript:void(0)\"  aria-expanded=\"false\"><i class=\"ea-expand-icon fa fa-angle-down\"><\/i> Can long-term couples keep passion alive after years of marriage?<\/a><\/h3><div class=\"sp-collapse spcollapse \" id=\"collapse1219094\" data-parent=#sp-ea-121909><div class=\"ea-body\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Yes, long-term couples can absolutely keep passion alive, though it usually requires more intention than it did early in the relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Trying new experiences together, maintaining physical affection outside of sex, and continuing to see your partner as someone worth pursuing all help sustain desire over time.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Passion in a long marriage tends to look different than it did at the start, but that doesn't mean it's any less real. <\/span><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"ea-card  sp-ea-single\"><h3 class=\"ea-header\"><a class=\"collapsed\" data-sptoggle=\"spcollapse\" data-sptarget=#collapse1219095 href=\"javascript:void(0)\"  aria-expanded=\"false\"><i class=\"ea-expand-icon fa fa-angle-down\"><\/i> How do you rekindle romance in a marriage that feels stagnant?<\/a><\/h3><div class=\"sp-collapse spcollapse \" id=\"collapse1219095\" data-parent=#sp-ea-121909><div class=\"ea-body\"><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Rekindling romance starts with reintroducing small moments of attention and effort that may have faded over time, like a genuine compliment, a planned date, or simply putting away distractions to talk.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Novelty helps too: trying a new activity together, changing up your routine, or revisiting what first drew you to each other can reawaken interest. Romance rarely returns all at once, but consistent small gestures tend to rebuild it gradually.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If the stagnation feels deeper than day-to-day busyness, a couples counselor can help identify what's underneath it. <\/span><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Keeping-the-Spark\"><\/span><b>Keeping the Spark<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There&rsquo;s no single formula for how to improve sex life in marriage, but small, consistent effort tends to matter more than any one trick. Some tips will resonate more than others, and that&rsquo;s fine.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What matters is picking a few and actually trying them, rather than waiting for motivation to strike on its own. Communication tends to make the biggest difference of all, since it&rsquo;s hard to meet a need your partner never knew you had.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Knowing what you like, telling your partner about it, and staying curious about each other keeps the spark from fading over time. If you want more structured support, explore Courses for Happier Relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If sex has become less frequent or less satisfying in your marriage, you&rsquo;re not alone, and it doesn&rsquo;t mean something is broken beyond repair. Many couples hit a stretch where intimacy feels routine or distant, often without any single clear cause.&nbsp; Learning how to improve sex life in marriage usually comes down to small, consistent changes rather than one dramatic fix: better communication, a bit more comfort with each other, and a willingness to shake up your routine.&nbsp; Physical intimacy tends to develop naturally early on, but the spark can fade over time if it&rsquo;s left unattended. With genuine effort, <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":675,"featured_media":72704,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[31],"tags":[2524],"class_list":["post-18135","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-physical-intimacy","tag-explore-intimacy-together","has_thumb"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18135","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/675"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18135"}],"version-history":[{"count":28,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18135\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":121910,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18135\/revisions\/121910"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/72704"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18135"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18135"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18135"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}