

{"id":17885,"date":"2017-09-25T11:19:59","date_gmt":"2017-09-25T11:19:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=17885"},"modified":"2026-03-19T10:47:07","modified_gmt":"2026-03-19T10:47:07","slug":"does-marriage-counseling-work-after-infidelity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/does-marriage-counseling-work-after-infidelity\/","title":{"rendered":"Does Marriage Counseling Help Couples to Recover After Infidelity?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-17886 size-full\" title=\"Does Marriage Counseling Work After Infidelity\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/Does-Marriage-Counseling-Work-After-Infidelity.jpg\" alt=\"Does Marriage Counseling Work After Infidelity\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The aftermath of betrayal or <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">infidelity<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> can be long and painful. Healing after an affair might seem to be a harrowing task.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But, working with a marriage counselor can help in surviving infidelity. Marriage counseling can be an effective way to recover after an affair, and for both partners to regain trust in one another.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, if you ask, can a marriage survive infidelity, or does marriage counseling work in healing from infidelity in marriage?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The answer is yes, but only if you are determined to do the work!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To understand how to deal with infidelity, or how to get over infidelity, let us first try to understand what exactly is relationship counseling or marriage <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/therapy\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">therapy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What-is-marriage-counseling\"><\/span>What is marriage counseling?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-50417 size-full\" title=\"What is marriage counseling\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/What-is-marriage-counseling.jpg\" alt=\"What is marriage counseling\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Marriage counseling is also referred to as couples therapy or couples counseling.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The aim of this type of counseling is to help couples understand each other, resolve conflicts, and improve the couple&rsquo;s relationship overall. This counseling can help couples:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/4-tips-for-improving-communication-in-a-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Communicate better<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Overcome differences<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Solve problems<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/healthy-arguments-are-necessary-to-make-a-marriage-work\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Argue in healthier ways<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/7-important-tips-to-build-trust-in-relationships\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Build trust and understanding<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As such, counseling can also be a very effective <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/ways-of-improving-trust-after-infidelity\/\">way of improving your marriage after infidelity<\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This type of counseling is provided by a licensed therapist, also known as marriage or couples therapists. Instead of regular therapists, these marriage therapists have one specific area they focus on: improving the relationship of the couple.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Marriage counseling is often short term. You may only need a few sessions to help you weather a crisis.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Or, you may need counseling for several months, particularly if your relationship has greatly deteriorated. As with individual psychotherapy, you typically see a marriage counselor once a week.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Who-should-attend-marriage-counseling\"><\/span>Who should attend marriage counseling?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Marriage counseling is for anyone seeking to improve their relationship. When to see a marriage counselor and for how long?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Unfortunately, due to shame or other factors, lots of couples don&rsquo;t seek the aid until it is way too late for marriage counseling and the damage has already been done. This will make the process of <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/rebuilding-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">rebuilding your relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> much harder.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You might <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/counseling\/counseling-after-infidelity\/\">need counseling for infidelity<\/a> for a couple of months if your relationship has deteriorated greatly.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But, does infidelity counseling really work?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For couples counseling to be effective you will probably see the counselor every week or every two weeks. The effectiveness of counseling depends on how consistent you are with the sessions.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The-downsides-of-marriage-counseling\"><\/span>The downsides of marriage counseling<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Before we start discussing the benefits of couples <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/learn-about-therapy\/issues\/infidelity\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">therapy after cheating<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, let us first read some of the downsides.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>1. It will take a great amount of time and energy &ndash; from both of you.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For many couples, infidelity counseling is a necessary step in order to bring back trust in their relationship after infidelity. Couples who want to work on their relationship know how much time, energy, and efforts are required.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Starting with couples therapy exercises and expecting results with minimum effort is not going to work.<\/span><b> Both of you will have to make concessions, put in the work, and open up to each other<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. It&rsquo;s not easy, but it can be well worth it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Time and again you may wonder: Does the counseling really work? But you must keep faith in the process.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>2. During counseling, you will be confronted with the truth<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The truth can be painful.&nbsp; It will make you wonder if couples counseling works or is the relentless pain you are enduring pointless.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>While working with a marriage counselor, be prepared for moments of vulnerability. It is at these times that the hard, unrelenting truth can sometimes overwhelm you.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, is knowing the truth a bad thing?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Absolutely not, although at the time when you hear your spouse talk about infidelity and why they did certain things it can feel very bad.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Nonetheless, the truth needs to come out. If both you and your partner have openness and honesty this creates the required situation for trust to re-build. Only then you can really <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/separation\/repairing-the-damage-caused-by-separation\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">deal with the damage that has been made<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>3. Be careful of the personal situation of your counselor<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The effectiveness of counseling or therapy also depends on the particular therapist you work with.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Your counselor&rsquo;s attitude and current mood will impact how they steer the conversation.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Before deciding to work with a particular marriage counselor, you need to know the style in which your counselor conducts sessions and whether or not they are a fit for you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As with many things in life, this is just one of the events that you cannot really control. Nonetheless, you can have an intake conversation and use that conversation to check whether this counselor would fit your relationship counseling needs.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The-benefits-of-marriage-counseling-after-an-affair\"><\/span>The benefits of marriage counseling after an affair<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-50418 size-full\" title=\"The benefits of marriage counseling&nbsp;after an affair\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/The-benefits-of-marriage-counseling-after-an-affair.jpg\" alt=\"The benefits of marriage counseling&nbsp;after an affair\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Besides those downsides, marriage counseling has a lot of benefits. Counseling after infidelity has been a blessing for many couples.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Not only did their relationship <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.mayoclinic.org\/healthy-lifestyle\/adult-health\/in-depth\/infidelity\/art-20048424\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">endure after infidelity<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, but it also thrived due to increased understanding between partners and more <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">intimacy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> in the relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Going to see a marriage counselor is hard. But it sure beats doing nothing and hoping that things will get better<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>1. It is beneficial to work together on improving your relationship<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Simply showing up together might seem trivial, but it&rsquo;s a great first step.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many issues between partners remain unresolved because one of the two does not want to see a therapist or counselor. However, if both of you are committed to the same goal &ndash; that is, <\/span><b>improving your relationship and building trust &ndash; it is definitely a huge advantage.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When the two of you are committed and willing to put in the required work and effort, half the work is already done. You must be willing to change and improve in order for marriage cheating counseling to be effective.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>2. More intimacy in your relationship<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Emotionally-focused therapy or counseling can not only <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/save-your-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">save your marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, but it can also help improve your marriage. Couples have reported more <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.goodtherapy.org\/blog\/psychpedia\/intimacy\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">intimacy in their relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> thanks to counseling.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is due to many reasons. <\/span><b>Better communication, more empathy, and better understanding<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> are some of the common reasons why these relationships flourish after hardships.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>3. A better understanding of yourself and your spouse<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lastly working with a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">marriage therapist<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> will help you better understand your spouse and his or her needs.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But not only that, but <\/span><b>it will also help you take a closer look at yourself.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Who are you deep down? What do you value most? What are your desires and needs?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This introspection can really improve both your relationship and your life in general.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Watch this video where the secrets of a couples counselor are revealed to lead us to happier relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/TUMmLkFKpEI\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p><strong>Conclusion<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, can marriage counseling save a marriage?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Yes, it does work. Even after infidelity!<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is it easy?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">No.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A lot of hard work, commitment, and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/forgiveness\/forgiveness-in-relationships\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">forgiveness are required<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. But if you and your partner both work on the same goal, it can be done.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Also, you can opt for online marriage counseling, or online couples counseling if you wish to go for the therapy from the comfort of your couch. Just check for the licensing and the relevant credibility before you finalize the counselor.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The aftermath of betrayal or infidelity can be long and painful. Healing after an affair might seem to be a harrowing task. But, working with a marriage counselor can help in surviving infidelity. Marriage counseling can be an effective way to recover after an affair, and for both partners to regain trust in one another. So, if you ask, can a marriage survive infidelity, or does marriage counseling work in healing from infidelity in marriage? The answer is yes, but only if you are determined to do the work! To understand how to deal with infidelity, or how to get <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":675,"featured_media":17886,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[15],"tags":[2670],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17885"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/675"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17885"}],"version-history":[{"count":23,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17885\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":118513,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17885\/revisions\/118513"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/17886"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17885"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17885"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17885"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}