{"id":17862,"date":"2017-09-25T12:05:34","date_gmt":"2017-09-25T12:05:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=17862"},"modified":"2024-05-21T11:21:50","modified_gmt":"2024-05-21T11:21:50","slug":"communication-skills-for-couples","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/communication-skills-for-couples\/","title":{"rendered":"Top 9 Effective Communication Skills for Couples"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-17911 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/Communication-Skills-for-Couple.jpg\" alt=\"Senior Couple Smiling And Looking Each Other On Bed At Bedroom Loving Concept\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The difference between a happy and an unhappy marriage lies in the competence to communicate.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Healthy communication skills for couples is one of the essential elements of a successful marriage.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the other hand, a lack of communication between couples can result in the silent treatment, bitterness, anger, and resentment.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once these overwhelm a partner, it negatively projects to defiant behaviors and an inability to maintain the basic elements of communication for conflict resolution.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Marriage counselors advise partners to openly share their negative and positive feelings to maintain peace in the marriage.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Good and effective communication skills for couples involve listening, responding, explaining, understanding in a calm tone in an appropriate place and manner.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Never resort to solve a problem with emotions, as your unstable mind may urge you to shout and yell. But enhancing your marriage communication skills or couples&rsquo; communication skills is easier said than done.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Also watch:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/Ds8H8oamqRo\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">From competing with each other, being critical, stonewalling, and unforgiveness, to attain effective communication for couples, you have to avoid a lot of pitfalls.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So to help you acquire the basic communication skills for couples or learn new communication techniques for couples, here are a few tips for couples to develop proper communication skills in marriage:<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1-Listen-carefully-and-respond-appropriately\"><\/span>1. Listen carefully and respond appropriately<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Proper communication needs the total participation of both parties.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><b>One of the vital communication tips for couples would be to allow your partner to talk as you <\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/322722211_The_Power_of_Listening_Lending_an_Ear_to_the_Partner_During_Dyadic_Coping_Conversations\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><b>actively listen<\/b><\/a><b> to all the complaints, appreciations, and concerns.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You may not be in agreement with all the issues, but empathize with a wailing sound or statement such as &ldquo;I feel your disappointment in my action, but do you realize that&hellip;&hellip;.&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is not a defense mechanism; it gives reassurance to your partner that you take into account their concern, but you also have your opinion or point of view.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You attract their attention for an open discussion to draw a conclusive solution.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2-Evade-personal-reproach\"><\/span>2. Evade personal reproach<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Avoid any form of personal criticism through insults, inappropriate body language, shouting, and yelling.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You may have a point, but the way you communicate has an effect on the way your partner conceives the information.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">P<\/span><b>ersonal reproach prompts your partner to take a personal defense strategy inhibiting your communication process.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Often, personal reproach works as a catalyst leading to heated arguments between partners.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You need to guide your body language, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/facial-expressions\/\">facial expressions<\/a>, and the tone of your voice properly so as to avoid giving wrong suggestions to your partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is one of the key communication skills for couples to develop if they want peaceful discussions every time.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3-Understand-one-another\"><\/span>3. Understand one another<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-50241 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/Understand-one-another.jpg\" alt=\"Attractive Embarrassed Happy Couple Sitting At Home And Smiling\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Seek your partner to listen to you without judging you. Psychologists recommend appreciation first in a bid to drive a point home.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A partner will feel valued despite some of his\/her weaknesses. Naturally, the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> dynamics tend to work better when you put yourself in your partner&rsquo;s shoes as you seek their attention for a fruitful communication process.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"4-Use-the-right-tone\"><\/span>4. Use the right tone<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are all of you emotionally stable when getting into a discussion? A quarrel regarding a sensitive issue can turn into a disaster only because you failed to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.eurekalert.org\/news-releases\/906600\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">use the right tone<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Couples communicating with maturity use the appropriate tone manifested with a stable mind to face the situation.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Never get the attention of your spouse in anger; you are bound to raise your voice leading to a complete shutdown of the communication channel.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">An effective tone gives you the gift of humility and politeness, guiding your choice of words and further calms your partner to join in the discussion humbly.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5-Seek-explanations\"><\/span>5. Seek explanations<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another communication skill for couples to practice is asking fact-finding questions or seeking explanations from their partner. This skill enables couples to understand each other better rather than making assumptions.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You are both responsible for the control of the discussion. The use of open-ended questions rather than closed questions gives room to your partner for sharing insights and thoughts on the situation.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Closed questions are more often used during a police interrogation and not for open fruitful communication.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"6-Use-the-first-person-reference\"><\/span>6. Use the first-person reference<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As you seek answers, be part of the question, For example, when you want to have an open chat about your partner avoiding their errands:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;I feel you sidestep your responsibilities because I don&rsquo;t give you enough attention.&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Now, this may not be the situation, but the fact that you acknowledge being part of the problem even if you are not, gives your spouse a challenge to own up and accept the situation as a collective responsibility.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"7-Maintain-calmness-and-balance-your-emotions\"><\/span>7. Maintain calmness and balance your emotions<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-50242 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/Maintain-calmness-and-balance-your-emotions.jpg\" alt=\"Conflict Couple Fighting Together And Sitting Together On The Couch At Home\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><b>A proper communication strategy for couples is to <\/b><b>stay calm<\/b><b> the entire time you speak with your partner<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> even if you realize the argument is becoming more hurtful during the course of the discussion.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The calmness gives you self-control to get a deeper understanding of the situation and, at the same time, helps your partner to vent the hurt feelings and move forward to a solution.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The best time to communicate is when you have cooled down, and you are in control of your emotions.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"8-Appreciate-your-partner\"><\/span>8. Appreciate your partner<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Communication, which is full of blames and negative thoughts, can never be fruitful. Your partner must have positive attributes. Otherwise, you could opt for a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/divorce\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">divorce<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> rather than communication, appreciate those attributes.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Everyone needs appreciation and positive compliments to soften the heart to sincerity and openness- a parameter for successful communication.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"9-Admit-the-influence-of-your-spouse\"><\/span>9. Admit the influence of your spouse<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A bad relationship communication practice is when one partner dominates or has control over the other.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Work together to alleviate your relationship from such traditions and do not let this hamper your peaceful communication process.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>As you seek to have good communication skills with your spouse, take into account the environment, emotional stability, and the willingness to open up for a talk.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In addition, your partner must have prior knowledge of the reason for the meeting. Avoid the mention of any past experiences.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Communication skills for couples are definitely one of the important chapters of life that each partner needs to memorize once they say &lsquo;I do&rsquo; to each other.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The difference between a happy and an unhappy marriage lies in the competence to communicate. Healthy communication skills for couples is one of the essential elements of a successful marriage.&nbsp; On the other hand, a lack of communication between couples can result in the silent treatment, bitterness, anger, and resentment. Once these overwhelm a partner, it negatively projects to defiant behaviors and an inability to maintain the basic elements of communication for conflict resolution. Marriage counselors advise partners to openly share their negative and positive feelings to maintain peace in the marriage. Good and effective communication skills for couples involve <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1419,"featured_media":17911,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[11],"tags":[2516],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17862"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17862"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17862\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":100095,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17862\/revisions\/100095"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/17911"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17862"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17862"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17862"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}