

{"id":17538,"date":"2017-09-14T11:00:13","date_gmt":"2017-09-14T11:00:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=17538"},"modified":"2022-08-03T08:47:45","modified_gmt":"2022-08-03T08:47:45","slug":"premarital-counseling-questionnaire","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/pre-marriage\/premarital-counseling-questionnaire\/","title":{"rendered":"Premarital Counseling Questionnaire"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-17543 size-full\" title=\"Premarital Counseling Questionnaire\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/Premarital-Counseling-Questionnaire.jpg\" alt=\"Premarital Counseling Questionnaire\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You&rsquo;re getting married! Congratulations! But first, there may be some things that you and your fianc&eacute; should talk about in advance. Speaking to each other openly and very honestly about these bigger topics (and everything else in your relationship) will enable you both to get on the same page and have harmony.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Premarital counseling questionnaire brings to light some very common, but important, questions that dive into the making of a healthy marriage. Read on the Pre-marriage counseling questionnaire and find critical premarital questions every couple must discuss before getting married.<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1-Discuss-your-finances\"><\/span>1. Discuss your finances<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Finance is probably one of the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/finance\/how-to-avoid-financial-problems-in-your-marriage\/\">biggest issues in a marriage<\/a> when both people are not in line with one another. To avoid a huge problem in your marriage, you and your spouse should discuss your past, present and future financial situations. Here are some questions to help:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul class=\"p-ul-list\"><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have you ever filed for bankruptcy?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you have debt? If so, how much and for what?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you have savings?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What are your beliefs about savings?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What are your beliefs about spending?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><strong>Recommended<\/strong>&nbsp;&ndash;&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/marriage-courses\/pre-marriage-course\">Pre Marriage&nbsp;Course<\/a><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2-Get-some-facts-straight-about-children\"><\/span>2. Get some facts straight about children<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another huge topic to discuss is Children. I know that some people go into marriage with children already and some people do not. Either way, here are some questions to get some facts straight about children.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul class=\"p-ul-list\"><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you don&rsquo;t have children already, how many do you want?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you do have children, do you want more?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How far apart would you like to have them?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What are your beliefs about <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/parenting\/\">raising children<\/a>?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What are your beliefs about disciplining the children?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3-Be-on-the-same-page-about-housing\"><\/span>3. Be on the same page about housing<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It may seem like knowing where to live is a &ldquo;no-brainer&rdquo; but it is still worth going over. Sometimes couples think they are on the same page about things then realize there may be some differences. Here are some questions to start that conversation:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul class=\"p-ul-list\"><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you both have your own place, which one will you move to?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you do not have your own place yet, are you wanting to rent or buy a house?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Where do you want to live? (What city, etc.)<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"4-Manage-your-expectations\"><\/span>4. Manage your expectations<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-27558 size-full\" title=\"Manage your expectations\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Best-Premarital-Counseling-Questions-You-Must-Ask.jpg\" alt=\"Manage your expectations\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Everyone has expectations about their lives. Therefore, everyone has expectations about what they think they should contribute to a marriage and what their spouses should contribute. It is vitally important to talk about what is expected in your marriage. Here are some expectation questions:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul class=\"p-ul-list\"><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How do you split the household chores?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are you both working?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How many times per week <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/10-reasons-to-have-sex-frequently-with-your-spouse\/\">do you think is it substantial to have sex<\/a>?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are you both in charge of finances?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5-Have-transparency-in-the-area-of-addictions\"><\/span>5. Have transparency in the area of addictions<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I know that it sounds like it should be obvious if someone has an addiction issue. Trust me on this one, it can be very well hidden. It is a great idea to have complete transparency in this area to avoid major setbacks later. Ask each other these:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul class=\"p-ul-list\"><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How often do you drink?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you gamble? If so, how often?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is there or has there ever been an issue with substance abuse?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you view pornography?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"6-Discuss-faith\"><\/span>6. Discuss faith<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you and\/or your spouse are people of faith, it should be discussed. Especially if you and your future spouse do not follow the same faith. Here are some starters to go over:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul class=\"p-ul-list\"><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do you follow the same faith?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you do not follow the same faith, are you able to respect each other&rsquo;s decisions in this area?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Will you teach your children your faith walk?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Will you attend church? If so, how often?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"7-Consider-sex-and-intimacy-issues\"><\/span>7. Consider sex and intimacy issues<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-52522\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/Premarital-Counseling-Questionnaire-consider-sex-and-intimacy-issues.jpg\" alt=\"Consider sex and intimacy issues during premarital counseling\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex is such a large part of a marriage. Sex allows married couples to become <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/secret-to-deeper-connection\/\">deeply connected to one another<\/a>. If you are not on the same page when it comes to sex, it may cause issues in the future. Here are some questions to ponder over:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul class=\"p-ul-list\"><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How often should we have sex?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Who should initiate?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What is allowed in our sexual life?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"8-Discuss-your-future-plans\"><\/span>8. Discuss your future plans<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We all have dreams. While two become one once you&rsquo;re married, your dreams don&rsquo;t just go away. You are still very much your own person as well as one half of a partnership. Because of this, it is great to discuss what you both envision for the future. Here are some questions to prompt you:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul class=\"p-ul-list\"><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Where do you envision yourself in five years?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What job do you want to have in five years?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What is your dream life?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Asking these questions and digging deeper into what it truly means to be married is a great place to start your marriage. Everyone gets a little anxious about marriage. But you don&rsquo;t have to stay anxious. I encourage you to continue to openly discuss these and any other topics that may arise. Cheers to a healthy, thriving marriage!<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You&rsquo;re getting married! Congratulations! But first, there may be some things that you and your fianc&eacute; should talk about in advance. Speaking to each other openly and very honestly about these bigger topics (and everything else in your relationship) will enable you both to get on the same page and have harmony. Premarital counseling questionnaire brings to light some very common, but important, questions that dive into the making of a healthy marriage. Read on the Pre-marriage counseling questionnaire and find critical premarital questions every couple must discuss before getting married. 1. Discuss your finances Finance is probably one of <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1419,"featured_media":17543,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[2618],"class_list":["post-17538","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-pre-marriage","tag-pre-marriage-counselling","has_thumb"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17538","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17538"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17538\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":79675,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17538\/revisions\/79675"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/17543"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17538"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17538"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17538"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}