

{"id":15220,"date":"2017-05-09T11:25:26","date_gmt":"2017-05-09T11:25:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=15220"},"modified":"2026-02-17T08:28:09","modified_gmt":"2026-02-17T08:28:09","slug":"encouraging-communication-with-your-spouse","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/encouraging-communication-with-your-spouse\/","title":{"rendered":"10 Trusted Tips For Encouraging Communication With Your Spouse"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-15233 size-full\" title=\"Tips For Encouraging Communication With Your Spouse\" src=\"http:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/i1-1.jpg\" alt=\"Tips For Encouraging Communication With Your Spouse\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have you and your spouse reached the stage where you &lsquo;know&rsquo; what the other is going to say before they say it? <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Maybe you find yourselves talking less than you did before, and you feel that your communication with spouse could do with a little encouragement. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Even the best <strong>marriages can benefit from a bit of&nbsp;marriage communication upliftment<\/strong> from time to time, like a drink of cool water on a hot day.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>So,&nbsp;<span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"how to communicate effectively in a relationship\"}'>how to communicate effectively in a relationship? Or&nbsp;how to communicate better with your spouse?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To answer these questions, here are ten practical and trusty tips for <span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"improving communication in relationships\"}'>improving communication in relationships&nbsp;that <\/span>can go a long way towards helping you communicate freely and happily with your spouse.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1-Be-thankful\"><\/span>1. Be thankful<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How often do you really take the time to notice all the things you have to be <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/love\/10-ways-to-show-gratitude-to-your-spouse\/\">grateful for in your relationship with your spouse<\/a>? And when you do notice, do you verbalize it? <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Just a simple &lsquo;thank you&rsquo; can help immensely in opening up the channels of <span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"communication in marriage\"}'>communication in marriage<\/span>. And the great thing is that the more you practice thankfulness, the more you will have to be thankful for. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong>Implement gratefulness as a <\/strong><span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"communication exercises for couples\"}'><strong>communication exercise<\/strong> for couples and<\/span>&nbsp;make a point of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/love\/10-ways-to-show-gratitude-to-your-spouse\/\">thanking your spouse<\/a> at least once every single day for something with which they have enriched your life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Also watch:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/1e8PonLinm8\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2-Stay-away-from-accusations\"><\/span>2. Stay away from accusations<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When little irritations and frustrations come, take the time to explain exactly how you feel. Don&rsquo;t immediately lash out at your spouse with a loaded accusation along the lines of &lsquo;you always&hellip;&rsquo; or &lsquo;you never&hellip;&rsquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Accusations can <a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/publication\/305488851_An_Empirical_Study_on_the_Causes_and_Effects_of_Communication_Breakdown_in_Marriages\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\">affect your ability to communicate with each other<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">An essential aspect of&nbsp;<span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"couple communications\"}'>couple communications is to&nbsp;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/the-key-to-judgment-free-communication-mirroring-validation-and-empathy\/\">avoid making a judgment<\/a> of your spouse&rsquo;s motives and intentions, because you may well be very wrong. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Rather talk it through and find out why and what the real story is. In this way, you can encourage communication and find a way forward together.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3-Some-things-don%E2%80%99t-need-to-be-said\"><\/span>3. Some things don&rsquo;t need to be said<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong>Transparency has its merits in <\/strong><span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"relationship communication\"}'><strong>relationship communication<\/strong>,&nbsp;<\/span>but sometimes discretion is needed when your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/communication\/yelling-does-not-help-dont-shout-it-out-write-it-out\/\">words could cause more damage<\/a> than good. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To <span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"improve communication in marriage\"}'>improve <a href=\"https:\/\/www.bartleby.com\/essay\/The-Importance-of-Communication-in-Marriage-F3T6DEYTC\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\">communication in marriage<\/a>, b<\/span>efore blurting out all your negative thoughts about your spouse&rsquo;s family, ask yourself whether this is necessary to say, or whether you should keep some of your thoughts and feelings to yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Just because you want to &lsquo;get something off your chest&rsquo; doesn&rsquo;t mean you have to dump it onto your spouse.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"4-Be-aware-of-timing\"><\/span>4. Be aware of timing<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When <span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"communicating with your spouse\"}'>communicating with your spouse, i<\/span>f you talk about the right thing at the wrong time, your communication could be seriously hindered or dampened. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Perhaps you are a &lsquo;night owl&rsquo; who feels wide awake in the late evenings while your spouse is an &lsquo;early bird&rsquo; who can&rsquo;t keep awake past ten o&rsquo;clock. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To maintain&nbsp;<span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"effective communication in marriage\"}'>effective communication in marriage,<\/span> you would need to find a time that works for both of you when you can discuss any important matters. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And it&rsquo;s no good bringing up serious issues just as your spouse is rushing off to work. When you are sensitive and careful to choose the right timing, then your communication can be greatly enhanced.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5-Use-mirroring\"><\/span>5. Use mirroring<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>Another&nbsp;<span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"ways to improve communication in a relationship\"}'>way to improve communication in a relationship is to use the mirroring technique.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your bathroom mirror can help you to know how your face looks and whether or not you are ready to take on the world. In the same way, your spouse can let you know how you are coming across in your communication. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sometimes what we mean to say is perceived and understood by others in a totally different way. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So <strong>mirroring can be a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/quiz-are-you-open-with-your-partner\">valuable relationship communication skill<\/a><\/strong><span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"communication skills for couples\"}'>&nbsp;for couples to&nbsp;<\/span>enhance and clarify a conversation with your spouse as you ask simple questions like &ldquo;What do you mean by that?&rdquo; or &ldquo;What I hear you saying is &hellip;&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"6-Keep-in-touch-%E2%80%93-literally\"><\/span>6. Keep in touch &ndash; literally<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your communication can be greatly <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/intimacy\/the-power-of-touch-in-your-marriage\/\">encouraged when you are in touch with each other physically<\/a>, holding hands, or gently resting your arm across her shoulders while her hand is on your leg. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you have a disagreement or argument, your instinctive reaction is to withdraw and pull away from each other. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Next time <strong>try drawing closer deliberately<\/strong> and see if it helps you to communicate in a gentler and more loving way.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-15234 size-full\" title=\"Keep in touch &ndash; literally\" src=\"http:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/i2-1.jpg\" alt=\"Keep in touch &ndash; literally\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"7-Be-clear-about-what-you-want\"><\/span>7. Be clear about what you want<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In a normal <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/keys-to-a-healthy-marriage\/\">healthy marriage relationship<\/a>, it is not possible to read your spouse&rsquo;s mind. It is unfair to expect him or her to know what you want or need at all times. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Rather just communicate clearly and be specific about what you need. Talk about how you can share the load so that one of you doesn&rsquo;t feel overburdened. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And let each other know what kind of treats or outings would make you feel loved and cherished. Then you have a much better chance of satisfying each other&rsquo;s expectations and finding contentment in your marriage.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"8-Cherish-your-memories\"><\/span>8. Cherish your memories<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Find pictures of the two of you that was taken during a special vacation or on a favorite date and find a way to celebrate it. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Perhaps you are into scrapbooking or maybe into simply framing your memories. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How about getting them enlarged and printed onto canvas to hang on your walls? Or maybe on a mug, mousepad, or fridge magnet where you can see and enjoy them every day. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your communication will be encouraged, too, as you talk about the good times you have had together.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"9-Learn-something-new-together\"><\/span>9. Learn something new together<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you learn something new, it <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/daily-steps-you-can-take-to-keep-your-marriage-fresh\/\">brings a sense of freshness and hope into your life<\/a>. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong>Doing new things together with your spouse is especially enriching<\/strong> as it gives you fresh fuel for communication and allows you to see your spouse in a different light. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you are both sporty, how about taking up a new sport together. Or you could take cooking classes and enjoy eating the meals you have made. Maybe you are feeling creative and want to learn how to do some craft or artwork together.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"10-Pray-together\"><\/span>10. Pray together<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One of the best <span data-sheets-userformat='{\"2\":15105,\"3\":{\"1\":0},\"11\":0,\"12\":0,\"14\":[null,2,0],\"15\":\"Calibri\",\"16\":11}' data-sheets-value='{\"1\":2,\"2\":\"relationship exercises for couples communication\"}'>relationship exercises for couples communication<\/span> is to pray together. As you bring your needs before your Maker, you will sense the security and peace of knowing that you are not struggling alone. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As the two of you look up together, you will be able to go forward in a better way, hand in hand, and communicating with each other every step of the way.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Have you and your spouse reached the stage where you &lsquo;know&rsquo; what the other is going to say before they say it? Maybe you find yourselves talking less than you did before, and you feel that your communication with spouse could do with a little encouragement. Even the best marriages can benefit from a bit of&nbsp;marriage communication upliftment from time to time, like a drink of cool water on a hot day. So,&nbsp;how to communicate effectively in a relationship? Or&nbsp;how to communicate better with your spouse? To answer these questions, here are ten practical and trusty tips for improving communication <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1419,"featured_media":15233,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[11],"tags":[2516],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15220"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1419"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15220"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15220\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":117110,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15220\/revisions\/117110"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15233"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15220"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15220"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15220"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}