

{"id":11365,"date":"2016-12-01T11:45:10","date_gmt":"2016-12-01T11:45:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=11365"},"modified":"2026-02-27T10:44:22","modified_gmt":"2026-02-27T10:44:22","slug":"30-experts-explain-reasons-why-men-indulge-in-cheating","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/30-experts-explain-reasons-why-men-indulge-in-cheating\/","title":{"rendered":"30 Underlying Reasons Why Men Cheat Explained by Experts"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-71789\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/reasons-why-do-men-cheat.jpg\" alt=\"Cheater Man Trying to Convince His Girlfriend While Women Is Crying\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/6-signs-that-your-partner-may-be-cheating-on-you\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cheating is when one partner betrays<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> the other partner&rsquo;s trust and breaks the promise of maintaining emotional and sexual exclusivity with them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/how-being-cheated-on-changes-you\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Being cheated by someone<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> you love very dearly can be devastating. People who get cheated on suffer enormously.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Can you imagine how it must feel when a person gets cheated and lied to by their partner, with whom they had dreamt of<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/ways-to-have-a-quality-time-with-your-partner\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">spending their entire lifetime<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They feel enraged, disappointed, and broken. The first thing that comes to their mind when they get cheated is, &ldquo;Why did this happen?<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/how-to-deal-with-a-cheater\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What made their partners cheat<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">?&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Let&rsquo;s discuss possible reasons why men cheat in a relationship and what you can do about it.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Do-all-men-cheat\"><\/span><b>Do all men cheat?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/3_eK76u0UhU?si=mv2m1J23_2fnLFtl\" width=\"800\" height=\"350\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">&#65279;<\/span><\/iframe><br><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Though both men and women cheat, statistics reveal that more men than women have confessed to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/why-do-men-have-affairs\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">having affairs<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> after marriage. So, what percentage of people cheat?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><div class=\"research_highlight\"><p>If you ask what percentage of men cheat and what percentage of women cheat, it&rsquo;s not surprising that men are 7 percent more likely to cheat than women are. This <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/ifstudies.org\/blog\/who-cheats-more-the-demographics-of-cheating-in-america\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">study<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is a proof.<\/p><\/div><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you are a victim who is contemplating reasons for<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mayoclinic.org\/healthy-lifestyle\/adult-health\/in-depth\/infidelity\/art-20048424\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">infidelity in marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, you could be perturbed and have thoughts like, &ldquo;Do all men cheat? Or do most men cheat?&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It would be really unfair to label only men as cheaters. It&rsquo;s not just men but every human being has a strong desire for self-gratification.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But, if this need for self-gratification exceeds the love and intimacy a person is getting from a relationship, it can<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/causes-of-infidelity-in-relationships\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">lead to infidelity<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cheating is a complex behavior influenced by individual choices, values, and circumstances. It&rsquo;s important to avoid making broad generalizations about any group based on the actions of a few.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Trust and faithfulness vary from person to person, and many individuals are committed to monogamous and faithful relationships. Reasons why men cheat are not determined by gender but by personal values, communication, and the dynamics within each relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Why-is-it-important-to-understand-why-men-cheat\"><\/span><b>Why is it important to understand why men cheat?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Understanding the reasons why men cheat is important because it can save relationships and make them stronger.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When we dig into the &ldquo;why,&rdquo; we often uncover issues like poor communication, unmet emotional needs, or just feeling unsatisfied.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once we know the reasons, we can work on fixing these problems, and making relationships better and more trustworthy. Plus, it gives guys a chance to grow and make better choices.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s also important to get rid of the shame around cheating so people can talk about it openly and support each other. So, knowing why men cheat isn&rsquo;t just about catching them but about making love last.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"30-possible-reasons-for-men-cheating\"><\/span><b>30 possible reasons for men cheating<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Women might find themselves tormented by the questions, &ldquo;Why does this happen? Why do married men cheat?&rdquo;, &ldquo;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/reasons-why-do-married-people-cheat\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why is he cheating<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">?&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is not just about fleeting flings. Many times, women find their husbands carrying on with long-standing affairs and wonder about reasons why men cheat and seek attention <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/risks-benefits-of-friendships-outside-marriage\/\">outside of marriage<\/a>. &ldquo;Why do people cheat in relationships?&rdquo;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To their relief, 30 relationship experts answer this question below to help you understand the reasons why guys cheat.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>1. Men cheat due to a lack of maturity<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What causes a man to cheat? Or why do husbands cheat? <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Their emotional maturity can be a reason.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Males, in general, will have a myriad of reasons why they engage in extramarital affairs. From my clinical experience, I have noticed a<\/span><b> common theme of emotional immaturity<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> among those who act on the emotional and physical aspects of cheating.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lacking the maturity to invest the time, commitment, and energy to work through core<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/8-common-problems-in-married-life\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">issues within their marital relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is one of the reasons why men cheat. Instead, these men often choose to engage in activities that are harmful to their significant others, families, and themselves.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The scorching repercussions that often come with the aftermath of cheating in a relationship are not considered until after the fact.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cheating men have a visible proclivity to be reckless. It would be helpful for men who are contemplating cheating to think long and hard if the affair is worth hurting or possibly losing the ones that they proclaim to love most.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is your relationship really worth gambling with?&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/dr-tequilla-hill\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dr. Tequilla Hill Hales,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Psychologist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-be-mature-in-a-relationship\/\" title=\"How to Be in a Mature Relationship: 15 Mindful Ways\">How to Be in a Mature Relationship: 15 Mindful Ways<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>2. Men cheat when they are made to feel inadequate<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Why do men cheat?<\/span><b> A gnawing feeling of Inadequacy<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is a major prelude to an urge to cheat. Men (and women) indulge in cheating when they feel inadequate.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Men who cheat repeatedly are those who are repeatedly made to feel like they are less than others. They seek to find someone that makes them feel like a priority.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In essence, they try to fill the void that their partner used to occupy.<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/attention-seeking-partner\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Seeking attention<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> outside a relationship is a sign that they were made to feel inadequate by their partners.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Looking for attention outside of a relationship is a prominent sign of an emerging<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/mental-health\/how-to-get-over-betrayal-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">betrayal in a relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and the reason why men cheat.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/danielle-adinolfi\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Danielle Adinolfi<\/span><\/i><\/a><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, <\/span><\/i><b><i>Sex Therapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>3. Men feel ashamed about their desire for pleasure<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Why do<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/how-to-be-a-good-husband\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">good husbands<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> have affairs?&rdquo; <\/span><b>The answer might be &ndash; Shame.&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why men have<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/top-10-signs-of-emotional-infidelity\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">emotional affairs<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and not just physical is because of shame; this is why people cheat.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I know that sounds ironic and like a cart-horse dilemma since many people become ashamed after getting caught cheating. However cheating behaviors are very often triggered by shame.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I hate to be reductive and categorical, but what many men who have cheated have in common&ndash;both gay and straight&ndash;is some degree of shame<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">about their desires for pleasure<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A cheating man is often someone plagued by a strong but hidden <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC10006235\/#:~:text=Sexual%20shame%20has%20been%20found,hypersexuality%20and%20sexual%20addiction16.\" rel=\"nofollow\" target=\"_blank\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sense of shame<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> about his sexual desires.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many of them love and are deeply devoted to their partners, but over time they develop an intense fear of their desires<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/dealing-with-rejection\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">being rejected<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The closer any of us gets to someone we love, the more familiar and familial the bond becomes, and therefore the more difficult it is to seek pleasure as individuals&ndash;especially when it comes to sex and romance&ndash;without potentially hurting the other person in some way, and feeling shame as a result.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Rather than risk the shame of exposing their desires and getting rejected, many men decide to have it both ways: a safe, secure, and loving relationship at home; and an exciting, liberating <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/seven-secrets-to-a-happy-sexual-relationship\/\">sexual relationship<\/a> elsewhere. This is the answer to the question, &ldquo;Why do men cheat?&rdquo;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As a therapist, I help people navigate the challenging task of negotiating<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/make-your-partner-sexually-satisfied\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual needs with their partners<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> rather than resort to cheating or unnecessary breakups.&nbsp; In many cases, couples decide to stay together as a result.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In some cases, frank and transparent dialogue about conflicting desires may lead to necessary separation.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But openly negotiating sexual needs is better for everyone involved than deceiving your partner and breaking the mutually recognized<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/rules-for-a-healthy-relationship\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">rules of the relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/mark-o-connell\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mark O&rsquo;Connell<\/span><\/i><\/a><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp; <\/span><\/i><b><i>Psychotherapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-88124\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/1909143883.jpg\" alt=\"Young affectionate couple\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h3><b>4. Men sometimes have an intimacy disorder<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why men cheat and lie in a relationship can be related to a deeper issue in their romantic life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When thinking about why do men cheat on their wives, any sign of your man grappling with intimacy issues could be a red flag.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Men cheat because they have an intimacy disorder<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, whether they commit online cheating or in person.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They likely don&rsquo;t know<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/intimacy\/the-changing-dynamics-of-intimacy-in-a-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">how to ask for intimacy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (not JUST sex), or if they do ask, they don&rsquo;t know how to do it in such a way that connects with the woman, who answers, &ldquo;Why do men lie and cheat?&rdquo;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, the man then looks for a cheap substitute to soothe his needs and desires for intimacy.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/greg-griffin\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Greg Griffin<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, <\/span><b><i>Pastoral Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/4-red-flags-he-will-cheat-again\/\" title=\"Will He Cheat Again on You? 17 Possible Signs &#038; How to Cope\">Will He Cheat Again on You? 17 Possible Signs &#038; How to Cope<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>5. Men cheat because they choose to<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Nothing &ldquo;makes&rdquo; men cheat on their partners; men<\/span><b> cheat because they choose to.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cheating is a choice. He will either choose to do it or choose not to.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cheating is the manifestation of unresolved issues not dealt with, a void that is unfulfilled, and the inability to<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/tips-to-maintain-commitment-in-your-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> fully commit to the relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and his partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A husband cheating on his wife is not something that just happens. It is a choice that the husband has made. There is no justified explanation for why men cheat.<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/lawanda-n-evans\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dr. Lawanda N. Evans,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>6. Men cheat due to selfishness<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;On the surface, there are many reasons why men cheat.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Such as: &ldquo;Grass is greener,&rdquo; feeling desired, the thrill of the conquest, feeling trapped, unhappiness, etc.&nbsp; <\/span><b>Underneath all those reasons and others, it is pretty simple, <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">selfishness.- the selfishness that hampers commitment, the integrity of character, and honoring another above self.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/sean-r-sears\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sean Sears,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Pastoral Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/signs-you-are-being-selfish-in-a-relationship\/\" title=\"20 Signs You Are Being Selfish in a Relationship\">20 Signs You Are Being Selfish in a Relationship<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>7. Men cheat due to a lack of appreciation<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why do guys cheat even if they love you?<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> They might be sensing a lack of appreciation.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;While there are numerous stated reasons, one theme that runs through them for men is the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/lack-of-appreciation\/\"><b>lack of appreciation<\/b><\/a><b> and attention<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many men feel they work hard for their families. They internalize their emotions and can feel they have been doing much and not receiving enough in return. This explains why men cheat.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The affair offers the opportunity to receive admiration, approval, new attention, seeing themselves anew in someone else&rsquo;s eyes.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/bob-taibbi\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Robert Taibbi<\/span><\/i><\/a><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">,<\/span><\/i> <b><i>Clinical social worker<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>8. Men seek love and attention<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why do men have affairs? <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Because they might be seeking more attention.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;There are a few reasons &ldquo;Why men cheat,&rdquo; but the one that sticks out for me is men like attentiveness. In relationships, cheating rears its ugly head when there is a <\/span><b>lack of feeling loved and appreciated.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Oftentimes, especially in our fast-paced rush, rush rush, society, couples get so busy that they forget to care for each other.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Conversations become centered on logistics, &ldquo;Who&rsquo;s picking up the kids today,&rdquo; &ldquo;Don&rsquo;t forget to sign the papers for the bank,&rdquo; etc. Men, like the rest of us, seek love and attention.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>If they feel ignored, bullied, or nagged<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> at constantly, <\/span><b>they will seek someone out who listens, stops and compliments them,<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and makes them feel good, as opposed to what they felt like with their own partner, a failure.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Men and emotional affairs go hand in hand when there is a lack of attention from the spouse.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Emotionally cheating on your partner is, nonetheless, a form of cheating.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/dana-julian\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dana Julian<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, <\/span><b><i>Sex Therapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>9. Men need their egos stroked<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;The one most common reason is <\/span><b>personal insecurity which creates a huge need to have their ego stroked.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Any new &ldquo;conquest&rdquo; gives them the illusion that they are the most wonderful, which is why men have affairs.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But because it&rsquo;s based on external validation, the moment the new conquest complains about anything, the doubts are back with a vengeance, and he needs to look for a new conquest. This is why men cheat.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the exterior, he looks secure and even arrogant. But it&rsquo;s insecurity that drives him.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/ada-gonzalez\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ada Gonzalez<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, <\/span><b><i>Family Therapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/ego-in-relationship\/\" title=\"Ego in Relationships Is Bad for You: These 11 Signs Are a Proof\">Ego in Relationships Is Bad for You: These 11 Signs Are a Proof<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>10. Men become disillusioned with their marriage<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Often, men cheat on their wives because <\/span><b>they have become disillusioned with their marriage.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They thought that once they were married, life would be great.&nbsp; They would be together with their spouse and be able to talk all they wanted and have sex when they wanted, and live in an unencumbered world together.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, they begin to do life<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/what-keeps-couples-together\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">together with work<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, financial responsibilities, and having children.&nbsp; All of a sudden, the pleasure is gone.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>It appears that everything is about work and taking care of other people and their needs<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp; What about &ldquo;my needs!&rdquo;&nbsp; This is why married men cheat. Men become jealous of those little ones in the house who are consuming all of their spouse&rsquo;s time and energy.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">She doesn&rsquo;t seem to want or desire him anymore.&nbsp; All she does is take care of the kids, running everywhere with them and not paying attention to him.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is because they begin to look elsewhere for that person who will give them what they need, both &ndash; <\/span><b>attentiveness and sexual admiration.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> They are under the assumption that another person can and will meet their needs and make them happy.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They believe that it is not up to them but up to someone else to make them feel loved and wanted.&nbsp; After all, &ldquo;they deserve to be happy!&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/debbie-mcfadden\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Debbie Mcfadden,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/why-happily-married-men-cheat\/\" title=\"Why Do Married Men Cheat: 13 Possible Reasons &#038; Ways to Cope\">Why Do Married Men Cheat: 13 Possible Reasons &#038; Ways to Cope<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>11. Men cheat if they have a sexual addiction<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-90491\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/12\/1446196727.jpg\" alt=\"Happy couple talking to each other\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sexual urges are one of the biggest reasons behind what makes a man cheat in a relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;There are numerous reasons why men commit infidelity. One trend we have witnessed over the past 20 years has been an increase in the number of men who have been diagnosed with <\/span><b>sexual addiction.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">These individuals misuse sex to distract themselves from emotional distress that often is<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/therapy\/negative-experiences-of-the-past-can-affect-your-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">the result of past trauma or neglect<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They struggle to feel affirmed or desired, and this is the explanation for why men cheat.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They often have feelings of weakness and inferiority, and nearly all of them struggle with the ability to bond with others emotionally.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Their inappropriate actions are driven by impulse and the inability to compartmentalize their behaviors.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Men who undergo<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/therapy-issues\/us\/sex\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">counseling for sexual addiction<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> learn why they abuse sex &ndash; including cheating &ndash; and with that insight can deal with past traumas and learn to emotionally connect with their spouse in a healthy way, therefore significantly reducing the likelihood of future infidelity.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/eddie-capparucci\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Eddie Capparucci,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>12. Men desire adventure<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Why do people cheat on people they love?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>For the desire for adventure and thrill, risk-taking, and excitement seeking.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When husbands cheat, they escape from the routine and blandness of everyday life, the life between work, commute,<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/things-to-do-on-weekends-for-couples\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">boring weekends<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> with kids, in front of the TV set or computer.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The way out from responsibilities, duties, and the specific role they have been given or adopted for themselves. This answers why men cheat.&rdquo;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/eva-sadowski\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Eva Sadowski,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>13. Men cheat for various reasons<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">First, we have to recognize that there is a difference between why men cheat:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Variety<\/span><\/i><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Boredom<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The thrill of the hunt\/danger of an affair<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some men have no idea why they are compelled to do it<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">No moral code for marriage<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Inner drive\/need for attention (need for attention exceeds normalcy)<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The reasons men give for why husbands cheat will help you understand men&rsquo;s views on affairs:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Their partner has a<\/span><\/i>&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/what-can-happen-when-sex-leaves-the-marriage\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">low sex drive\/is not interested in sex<\/span><\/i><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The marriage is collapsing<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Unhappy with their partner<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Their partner isn&rsquo;t who they used to be<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">She gained weight<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Their wife nags too much is trying to change him or is a &ldquo;ball-buster&rdquo;<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Better sex with someone who understands them better<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The chemistry is gone<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">From an evolutionary perspective&ndash; they weren&rsquo;t designed to be monogamous<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s just skin on skin&ndash; just sex, baby<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Because they feel entitled\/they can<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">At the end of the day, however, even if their spouse is intolerable at many levels, there are much better ways to address the issue.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The bottom line is that a wife can make a man cheat about as much as she can make him abuse alcohol or drugs&ndash; it doesn&rsquo;t work this way.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/david-o-saenz\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">David O. Saenz<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, <\/span><b><i>Psychologist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>14. Men cheat because of the darkness in their hearts<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;One of the most common reasons men cheat on their partners centers on darkness in their heart or mind, where factors including<\/span><b> lust, pride, the enticements of an affair, and personal frustrations with their partner or life<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, in general, make them susceptible to being unfaithful.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/eric-gomez\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Eric Gomez,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED QUIZ : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/am-i-bisexual-quiz\" title=\"Am I Bisexual Quiz\">Am I Bisexual Quiz<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>15. Men cheat for avoidance, culture, value<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;There is no one defining factor that determines infidelity.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, the three areas listed below are strong factors working in unison that can determine if one makes a choice to cheat on their spouse.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Avoidance<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: fear of looking at our own behaviors and choices. Feeling stuck or not being sure of what to do represents a fear of making a different choice.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Culturally ingrained<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: If society, parents, or societal leadership condones infidelity as a value where we may no longer see cheating<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/mental-health\/negative-behaviors-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">as a negative behavior<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Value<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: If we see maintaining marriage as an important value (outside of abuse), we will be more open and willing to make new choices that work towards<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/relationship-maintenance-101\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">maintaining the marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">These are the reasons that explain why men cheat.&rdquo;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/lisa-fogel\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lisa Fogel<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, <\/span><b><i>Psychotherapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>16. Men cheat when their partners are unavailable<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Men (or women) cheat <\/span><b>when their partners are unavailable to them.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Both partners are<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/benefits-of-vulnerability-in-relationships\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">particularly vulnerable<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> during a reproductive journey, including loss or fertility challenges, especially if their grief paths diverge for long periods of time.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The weakness that comes through is why men cheat.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/julie-bindeman\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Julie Bindeman,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Psychologist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED QUIZ : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/is-my-husband-emotionally-unavailable-quiz\" title=\"Is My Husband Emotionally Unavailable Quiz\">Is My Husband Emotionally Unavailable Quiz<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>17. Men cheat when there is a lack of intimacy<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;It is because of intimacy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cheating is a result of a<\/span>&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/lack-of-intimacy-living-in-a-sexless-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">lack of intimacy in a marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Intimacy can be a challenge, but if a man is <\/span><b>not feeling fully &ldquo;seen&rdquo; in his relationship<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or not communicating his needs, it can<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/are-you-feeling-alone-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">leave him feeling empty<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, lonely, angry, and unappreciated.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">He may then want to fulfill that need outside the relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It&rsquo;s his way of saying, &ldquo;Someone else sees me and my value and understands my needs, so I&rsquo;m going to get what I need and want there instead.&rdquo;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/jake-myers\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Jake Myres<\/span><\/i><\/a><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">,<\/span><\/i> <b><i>Marriage and Family Therapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-71792\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/men-cheat-for-ego-inflation.jpg\" alt=\"Portrait of Young Caucasian Woman Chastising Husband for His Antics, Bad Behavior, Unhealthy Relationships, Problems in Family\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h3><b>18. Men cheat when there is a lack of admiration<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The single most common reason is this.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I see why men look outside the relationship for companionship as a perceived<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/admiration-is-an-essential-part-of-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">lack of admiration<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and approval by their partner.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is because<\/span><b> they tend to base their sense of self on how the people in the room view them<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">; the outside world serves as a mirror of self-worth. So if a man encounters disapproval, disdain, or disappointment at home, they internalize those emotions.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So when a person outside the relationship then provides a counter to those feelings and shows a different &ldquo;reflection&rdquo; to the man, the man is often drawn to that.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And seeing yourself in an encouraging light, well, that&rsquo;s often very hard to resist.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/crystal-rice\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Crystal Rice,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>19. Men cheat for ego inflation<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Why do happy people cheat?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I believe that <\/span><b>some men cheat for ego inflation<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. It feels good to be considered desirable and<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/types-of-attraction\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">attractive to others<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, unfortunately, even outside of marriage.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The mindset of a cheating man is to feel powerful and alluring. This is sad but is the reason that tells why men cheat.&rdquo;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/k-hara-mckinney\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">K&rsquo;hara Mckinney<\/span><\/i><\/a><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">,<\/span><\/i> <b><i>Marriage and Family Therapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>20. Infidelity is a crime of opportunity<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;While there are numerous reasons that could explain why do men cheat on their partners,<\/span><b> one of the most common reasons is that it is a &lsquo;crime&rsquo; of opportunity.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Infidelity does not necessarily signal something wrong in the relationship; rather, it reflects that<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/the-true-meaning-of-being-in-a-relationship\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">being in a relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is a daily choice.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/trey-cole\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Trey Cole,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Psychologist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED QUIZ : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/should-i-stay-with-my-husband-after-he-cheated-quiz\" title=\"Should I Stay With My Husband After He Cheated Quiz\">Should I Stay With My Husband After He Cheated Quiz<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>21. Men cheat when they feel their woman is unhappy<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;I believe men cheat because men live to<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/counseling\/happy-wife-happy-life-heres-how-to-make-her-happy\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> make their women happy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and when they no longer feel that they are succeeding, <\/span><b>they seek a new woman that they can make happy<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Wrong, yes, but true why men cheat.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/terra-bruns\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Terra Bruns<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, <\/span><b><i>Relationship expert<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>22. Men cheat as an emotional element missing<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;In my experience, people cheat because something is missing. <\/span><b>A core emotional element that a person needs is not being met.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Either from within the relationship, which is more common, or someone comes along that fills that need.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But it can be something missing from within a person.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For example, a person who didn&rsquo;t get a lot of attention in their younger years feels really good when they get special attention or are showing interest. This is why men cheat.&rdquo;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/ken-burns\"> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ken Burns,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED QUIZ : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/quizzes\/am-i-emotionally-exhausted\" title=\"Am I Emotionally Exhausted Quiz\">Am I Emotionally Exhausted Quiz<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>23. Men cheat when they don&rsquo;t feel valued<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;While there are, of course, some men who are just entitled jerks, who don&rsquo;t respect their partners and simply feel they can do whatever they want, my experience is that men cheat chiefly because they don&rsquo;t feel valued.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This can come in many different forms, of course, based on the individual. Some men may feel devalued if their partners don&rsquo;t talk with them,<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/counseling\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">spend time with them<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, or participate in hobbies with them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Others may feel devalued if their partners stop having<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/regular-sex-can-make-relationship-better\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">regular sex with them<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Or if their partners seem too busy with life, household, children, work, etc., to prioritize them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But underlying all of that is a sense that the man does not matter, that <\/span><b>he is not valued and that his partner no longer appreciates him.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This causes the men to seek attention elsewhere, and again in my experience, most often, it is first this<\/span><b> seeking of attention from another<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (that is often referred to as an &ldquo;emotional affair&rdquo;) that then leads to sex later (in a &ldquo;full-blown affair&rdquo;).<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So if you don&rsquo;t prioritize your man, and don&rsquo;t make him feel valued, then you shouldn&rsquo;t be surprised when he seeks attention elsewhere.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/steven-stewart\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Steven Stewart,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>24. Men cheat when they can&rsquo;t connect with themselves<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Why men cheat is because of their <\/span><b>inability to emotionally connect to their wounded inner child who is searching to be nurtured<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and affirmed that they are enough and deserving of being loved simply due to their inherent worth and preciousness.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Since they struggle with this concept of worthiness, they continuously chase an unattainable goal and move from one person to the next.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I think this same concept applies to many women too.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/mark-glover\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mark Glover,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Counselor<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>25. Men cheat when their needs are not met<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;I do not think that there is a common reason why men cheat because everyone is unique, and their situation is unique.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What happens in marriages to cause problems, such as an affair, is that people feel<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/emotional-intimacy\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">emotionally disconnected from their partner<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and<\/span><b> do not know how to get their needs met in a healthy manner<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> so they look for other ways to fulfill themselves.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/trish-pauls\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Trish Pauls,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Psychotherapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>26. Men miss being adored, admired, and desired<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Why men cheat is because they lack the very feeling that drew them into the long-term relationship they are in.&nbsp; The feeling of being adored, admired, and desired is the romantic ail that feels so intoxicating.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">At around 6-18 months, <\/span><b>it is not uncommon for the man to &ldquo;fall off the pedestal&rdquo; as reality sets in and life&rsquo;s challenges become a priority.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">People, not just men, by the way, miss this short and intense phase.&nbsp; This feeling, which play s<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/self-esteem-makes-successful-relationships\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">upon self-esteem<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and early attachment deprivation, counteracts all insecurity and self-doubt.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It gets deeply rooted in the psyche and lives there, waiting to be reactivated.&nbsp; While a long-term partner can provide other important feelings, it is nearly impossible to replicate this original insatiable desire.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Along comes a stranger, who may immediately activate this feeling.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Temptation in full swing can hit hard, especially when one is not being elevated by his partner on a regular basis.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/katherine-mazza\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Katherine Mazza,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Psychotherapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-71793\" src=\"https:\/\/image.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/men-cheat-when-they-feel-unacknowledged.jpg\" alt=\"Suspicious Jealous Boyfriend Hug Girlfriend Checking Her Phone Calls Contacts Behind Back\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\"><\/p>\n<h3><b>27. Men cheat when they feel unacknowledged<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;There&rsquo;s no one single reason why men cheat, but one common thread has to do with feeling unappreciated and not<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/simple-steps-to-take-care-of-your-relationships\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">taken care of well enough in the relationship<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many people feel they&rsquo;re the ones doing most of the work in the relationship and that the work isn&rsquo;t seen or rewarded.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When we feel like all our effort goes unacknowledged, and we don&rsquo;t know how to give ourselves the love and admiration we need, we look outside.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A new lover tends to be adoring and focuses on all our best qualities, and this delivers the approval we&rsquo;re desperate for&mdash;approval that&rsquo;s lacking from both our partner and ourselves. &rdquo;<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/vicki-botnick\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Vicki Botnick<\/span><\/i><\/a><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">,<\/span><\/i> <b><i>Counselor and Psychotherapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/infidelity\/woman-feels-after-being-cheated\/\" title=\"How a Woman Feels After Being Cheated On\">How a Woman Feels After Being Cheated On<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>28. Different circumstances under which men cheat<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;There are no simple answers to this question as to why men cheat because each man has his own reasons, and each circumstance is different.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Also, there certainly are differences between a man who gets caught up in multiple affairs, porn addiction, cyber affairs, or sleeping with prostitutes and a man<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/love\/fall-in-love\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">who falls in love<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> with his co-worker.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The reasons for<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/mental-health\/sex-and-pornography-addiction\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sex addiction<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> are embedded in trauma, while often, men who have single affairs cite a lack of something they need in their primary relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sometimes they miss passionate sex, but just as often, they report that they don&rsquo;t feel seen or appreciated by their wives. Women get busy running the household, working in their own careers, and rearing the children.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">At home, men report that <\/span><b>they often feel neglected and taken for granted.<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> In that state of loneliness, they become susceptible to the attention and adoration of someone new.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">At work, they are looked up to, feel powerful and worthy, and may cultivate a relationship with a woman who notices that.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/mary-kay-cocharo\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mary Kay Cocharo,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Couples Therapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3><b>29. Modern romantic idea is the cause of infidelity<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Why men cheat is because they focus on the romantic idea, which is practically a setup for infidelity.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When a relationship inevitably loses its initial luster, it is not uncommon to long for the passion,<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/physical-intimacy\/sex-tips-for-couples\/\"> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual thrill<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and idealized connection with another that was present when it began.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Those who understand and trust the evolution of love that exists in a truly committed relationship will rarely find themselves tempted to cheat.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/marcie-scranton\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Marcie Scranton,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Psychotherapist<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<div class=\"wporg-box\"><div class=\"\"><span class=\"wporg_heading\">RELATED READING : <\/span><span class=\"wporg_title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/romance\/10-ways-to-be-romantic-to-your-wife\/\" title=\"How to Be Romantic With Your Wife: 40 Creative Ideas\">How to Be Romantic With Your Wife: 40 Creative Ideas<\/a><\/span><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><b>30. Men seek novelty<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&ldquo;Recent research shows that men and women cheat to about the same degree.&nbsp; The common reason <\/span><b>why men cheat is to seek novelty<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The common reason<\/span><b> women cheat is because of frustrations in their relationship<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&rdquo; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/experts\/gerald-schoenewolf\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Gerald Schoenewolf,<\/span><\/i><\/a> <b><i>Psychoanalyst<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dr. Kenneth Rosenberg, an addiction psychiatrist and author of &rdquo; Infidelity: Why men and women cheat,&rdquo; says science can help explain why some spouses cheat. Watch the video:<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/qHR1EQoGmfk?si=pYVEmxVlnHvfcnle\" width=\"804\" height=\"350\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><span data-mce-type=\"bookmark\" style=\"display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;\" class=\"mce_SELRES_start\">&#65279;<\/span><\/iframe><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What-to-do-if-your-man-is-cheating-on-you\"><\/span><b>What to do if your man is cheating on you?<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Discovering that your partner is cheating can be incredibly painful. While every situation is unique, here are some simple steps to consider if your man is cheating:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Talk openly:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Initiate an honest conversation. Ask him about your suspicions and listen to his side of the story.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Trust your instincts:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> If the evidence is clear, trust your gut. Ignoring the signs can prolong the pain.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Seek support:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Reach out to friends or a therapist for emotional support. You don&rsquo;t have to go through this alone.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Consider counseling:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Relationship counseling can help both of you communicate and decide on the best way forward.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><b>Assess your future:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Ultimately, decide if the relationship is worth salvaging or if it&rsquo;s time to move on and prioritize your well-being.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul><h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Common-myths-about-why-men-cheat\"><\/span><b>Common myths about why men cheat<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We&rsquo;ve all heard a lot about why men cheat, but not everything you hear is true. Let&rsquo;s debunk some common myths about the reasons behind infidelity:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Myth: Men cheat for more sex: <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While physical attraction can play a role, men often cheat due to emotional or relationship issues, not just the desire for more sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Myth: Men cheat because they&rsquo;re unhappy: <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Happiness in the relationship isn&rsquo;t always the issue. Men might cheat for various reasons, including boredom or opportunity.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Myth: Men cheat when they&rsquo;re drunk or away:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Cheating isn&rsquo;t always impulsive. It can be a planned decision made when sober and even when they&rsquo;re close by.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Myth: Men cheat because their partner isn&rsquo;t attractive:<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Attractiveness is subjective, and many men cheat even when they&rsquo;re with someone they find attractive.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Myth: Men cheat because they want to leave the relationship: <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cheating doesn&rsquo;t always mean they want to end the relationship. It&rsquo;s more complex and often tied to personal issues and not necessarily a desire to leave.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Commonly-asked-questions\"><\/span><b>Commonly asked questions<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cheating is a sensitive and complex topic in relationships. Here are some straightforward answers to common questions about cheating<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>Is cheating ever justified?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cheating is generally not justified. Open communication and addressing relationship issues are healthier alternatives to infidelity.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>What are the consequences of cheating?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Consequences of cheating can include trust issues, emotional pain, and damaged relationships. It can lead to breakups and even legal issues in some cases.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>How can I tell if a man is cheating?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Signs may include unusual behavior, increased secrecy, changes in routine, or decreased intimacy. Trust your instincts but communicate openly for clarity.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>What should I do if I think a man is cheating?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Approach the issue calmly and honestly. Share your concerns and ask for clarity. Communication is key to resolving doubts.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul><li aria-level=\"1\">\n<h3><b>How can I prevent my partner from cheating?<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Preventing cheating involves building a strong foundation of trust and open communication in your relationship. Address problems as they arise, keep the connection strong, and prioritize each other&rsquo;s needs.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Approaching-the-issue-properly\"><\/span><b>Approaching the issue properly<\/b><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Now that you know the various reasons<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/30-experts-explain-reasons-why-men-indulge-in-cheating\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">why men cheat<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and lie, you must make an honest effort to take care of the critical aspects to<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/save-your-marriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">save your marriage<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, if you&rsquo;re willing to.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Of course, you can do nothing if it is done deliberately by your husband to get rid of you or hurt you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But in other cases, when you know that your husband is a great person, try<\/span> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/couple-bonding-activities-to-strengthen-the-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">to cultivate a deeper bond<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, friendship, and love. No man in his right mind would want to ruin a relationship that offers him all this and more.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">These pieces of useful advice will help women identify the reasons why men cheat and perhaps give them some insight into how men think and what they can do to prevent them from cheating.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false,"raw":""},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Cheating is when one partner betrays the other partner&rsquo;s trust and breaks the promise of maintaining emotional and sexual exclusivity with them. Being cheated by someone you love very dearly can be devastating. People who get cheated on suffer enormously. Can you imagine how it must feel when a person gets cheated and lied to by their partner, with whom they had dreamt of spending their entire lifetime? They feel enraged, disappointed, and broken. The first thing that comes to their mind when they get cheated is, &ldquo;Why did this happen? What made their partners cheat?&rdquo; Let&rsquo;s discuss possible reasons <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":675,"featured_media":71789,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[23],"tags":[2689],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11365"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/675"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11365"}],"version-history":[{"count":173,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11365\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":117502,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11365\/revisions\/117502"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/71789"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11365"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11365"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11365"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}