{"id":10006,"date":"2016-08-16T10:01:26","date_gmt":"2016-08-16T10:01:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/?p=10006"},"modified":"2026-02-10T06:03:45","modified_gmt":"2026-02-10T06:03:45","slug":"six-reasons-why-your-relationship-may-be-suffering","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.marriage.com\/advice\/relationship\/six-reasons-why-your-relationship-may-be-suffering\/","title":{"rendered":"Six Reasons Why Your Relationship May be Suffering"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\"Six<\/p>\n

We’ve all known the struggle of being in a relationship and trying to make it work.  Many of us complain to our friends and family when our mates are causing us strife and we feel frustrated, and many of us complain about the same things—lack of communication, lack of attention, and unmet expectations, for example.  <\/span><\/p>\n

Some relationships are not meant to last, either because they run their course and this is not the right person for you in the long-run (you have to kiss a lot of frogs as they say) and some relationships are poisoned by drug or alcohol abuse, infidelity<\/a>, or domestic violence, and have a small chance of being saved without considerable help and change for both parties.  <\/span><\/p>\n

However, most of us have “normal” complaints and “normal” reasons that our relationships may struggle, feel unfulfilling, or go through a difficult period.  <\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>High Expectations<\/b><\/span><\/h2>\n

Over time, we, particularly women, have come to expect different things from marriage<\/a> than in the past.  Now that women make their own money, with many young women having more education and making more than their spouses, we no longer see being a “good provider” as one of the biggest priorities for a spouse.  Over the past generation or so, gender roles, and therefore marital roles have changed, and our expectations have changed with it, often unfairly.  <\/span><\/p>\n

Many women expect their spouses to be less like men and more like women—emotionally expressive, attentive enough to meet our needs before we even know what we need, romantic, etc.<\/strong>  And while there are men like this, many men are lacking in some of these skills, and we fault them for it, without really articulating what we need and want.  <\/span><\/p>\n

Men, on the other hand, may have married women with careers and interests outside the home, but have expectations that they can do this <\/span>and<\/i> run the household like the housewives of old.  We expect our spouses to be more well-rounded than they may be able to reasonably be<\/strong>, and then fault them for being human.  No one is going to be able to meet every need or fill every role, and we shouldn’t expect that.  Going into marriage thinking that our partner will be a superhero sets us up for disaster.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>Searching for Something Missing in Ourselves<\/b><\/span><\/h2>\n