3 Ways to Avoid an Explosive Marriage

3 Ways to Avoid an Explosive Marriage

Is your marriage a ticking time bomb? (Read: TIC)

A bomb is explosive, does damage to everything within proximity and it is hard to stop once it is started. A marriage can avoid such damage when the proper time and preparation has been taken to avoid areas that cause major issues. I know you are probably wondering why the “TIC” in ticking is capitalized.

T.I.C is an acronym for the top 3 reasons why marriages struggle

1. Trust

It is not always the big stuff that defies your spouse’s trust, but the little stuff too.

Couples forget that incrementally, over time, you can do things to minimize the trust your partner has for you. It does not have to be something big like cheating. Not keeping your word, not picking up the children when you say you will, and not checking in with your spouse when needed can all lead to “I don’t trust you!”

Having trust issues in your marriage can cause a downward spiral which makes it easier for other issues to enter in.

Trust is a huge component and both partners must make sure you are doing trustworthy behaviors. It is one of the hardest things to rebuild once broken, but it can be done.

2. Infidelity

There are some couples where sexual intercourse is where the line is drawn

Cheating may look different because there are boundaries and lines for each marriage.

There are some couples where sexual intercourse is where the line is drawn. In other marriages, emotional cheating is enough to walk away. Therefore, you must build an affair-proof marriage.

How do you do that?

That means you’re putting up safeguards and these barriers around your relationship so when you are tempted by an attractive person or by someone who gives you attention, you are aware that your marriage is way more valuable than to risk it on something so temporary.

Ask yourself – Is ruining my marriage and tearing my family apart worth the temporary pleasure that this situation will bring?

3. Communication

Communication is one of the biggest components that couples do not even realize is impacting their relationship.

I personally feel that all these other issues: Trust, Infidelity, Intimacy issues, all of those start with poor communication. If you’re not talking about it, how can you fix something?

Your spouse is not a mind-reader so you need to get better at understanding the effective two-way communication in a relationship.

You need to learn how to communicate both ways. You need to learn how to verbalize what’s going on. In addition to that, making sure you are verbalizing your concerns under the right situations and the right circumstance. You can’t just yap your mouth every time you feel like it.

Sometimes, it requires you to be quiet and to listen. The key is to listen to gain understanding, not listen just to respond.

Trust, infidelity and communication issues can ultimately leave broken relationships and even potentially divorce. Make a commitment to your spouse today that you will actively work on these three areas so you can avoid having an explosive marriage that can possibly lead to more detrimental issues down the line.

Kiaundra Jackson
Marriage & Family Therapist
Kiaundra Jackson has been seen on the Emmy-Award Winning TV Show, The Doctors. She has been recently featured in the New York Times, Vice, BET and The Huffington Post as one of the ‘10 Black Female Therapists You Should Know.’ She is an international speaker, 2x author, and a trusted Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist that gets results. She is a noted expert on the healthy relationship and mental health.