our Perfect Partner- What's in a List? | Marriage.com

Your Perfect Partner- What’s in a List? Not Love, Rejection, and Loneliness, Right?

 Make a list of all of the traits you would admire in a partner

Valentine’s Day did not go your way? Valentine’s Day can be a great day if you are love and that love is returned. But what about unrequited love-you know-when the other person barely notices you let alone cherishes you like you do them? I still remember when a family member expressed that his girlfriend dumped him on Valentine’s Day via text! What a harsh world we live in today where technology decreases the need for civility.

Taking stock

This type of reminder can be a great time to take stock of love. Nobody bought you flowers or gave you a card- what have you been doing about that?! Do you have a plan or idea about your perfect partner beyond swipe left or right? What do you really value (hint – It must be more than good looks or cash to splash). What are your values and likes?

Traits and characteristics of love

What do I really want, what sort of person, what traits and habits, how will they look, how do they act around their family, do they want children, are they a professional or a tradesman, a singer or a nurse. Then think, what do I need to do to become the person to attract a person like this?
 Think, what do I need to do to become the person to attract a person like this united-sense-of-yourselves united-sense-of-yourselves

The law of attraction

This universal law suggests that what we put out there with our energy and focus ultimately comes back to us. Do you put out gossip, negativity, hopelessness? Or do you project success, friendliness, positivity? The law of attraction works both ways remember so you may be drawn to people who share your attitudes and behaviours. Remember your attitude dictates your altitude, so you can either soar with the eagles or gobble with the turkeys!

Plan the work and work the plan

So make a list of all of the traits and things you would admire in a partner. Visualise this person, what do they look like, talk like, what is their attitude and mindset, what do they want from life, where do they spend time etc. Then list all of the things that a person like that would find attractive. Do you have all of those traits? Probably not quite yet-so that is your personal development plan. Take this plan to a coach, counselor, or psychologist and work the plan! Remember, personal development is a lifelong journey and the main beneficiary is you!

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James Ising
Counselor
  VERIFIED EXPERT
James is an understanding and compassionate counsellor using his experience and training to help you achieve your goals. Whether its family breakdown, marriage and relationship, parenting, or personal issues-James has the knowledge, information and support to help you get results. Your session will be tailored to suit your unique needs and goals. He is a psychologist and relationships counsellor with over a decade of experience in building and maintaining relationships.

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