When growing up, what was your idea of marriage? Have you dreamt of having a beautiful beach wedding or maybe just a simple wedding just as long as you’re with the one you love?
Indeed, marriage is such a beautiful thing. Imagine the idea of two people falling in love and getting married to start a family — sounds like something in the movies right? However, marriage nowadays isn’t like that anymore, in fact, even in movies marriage is no longer being shown as one of the highlights.
Some people even think that today, marriage is overrated because there are far more practical reasons why people choose not to get married.
What is marriage today?
Marriage is changing and that’s the reality.
The marriage that we now see today is very different from the marriage that we have seen when we were children. When you hear the word “marriage”, most of the time, the first word you can incorporate with it is the word “divorce”.
This is sad but it’s a fact that most marriages of today often lead to divorce. This has caused more and more people to think that marriage is overrated today.
Imagine that you are now as one and married, legal and have promised to love one another through death do you part but what happens when you’re faced with temptations and trials? What if you struggle financially and most of all, what if there’s no respect and the willingness to compromise?
Divorce has given marriage a way out.
As messy and stressful as it may seem, divorce is a way for a couple to end a failed marriage. People nowadays decide to get married and then choose divorce so quickly that the value and essence of marriage has depreciated over time.
Why marriage is now overrated?
Marriage is overrated today and that’s what most people think. There are still couples who would still plan to get married but the number of people who think otherwise is now a greater percentage of the population.
Let’s dig in to the 11 truths why marriage is now overrated –
1. Marriage nowadays is becoming outdated
Reality is; marriage is way different from the marriage that we know before. Today, we don’t need someone to feed us or to take care of us, we can do that on our own.
But, sometimes, marriage makes us feel trapped.
2. Marriage is equals to sacrifice
If you are someone who doesn’t see yourself being tied down to a mutual decision or someone who can’t sacrifice your career to be a full time wife or husband, then marriage is definitely not for you.
Gone are the days where you need to sacrifice something just to have a happy marriage. If you sacrifice your career, would you truly be happy?
3. Marriage demands fidelity for life
Let’s be true to ourselves here shall we? Marriage is, for some — like a chain where you’ll have to have fidelity for life. Today, temptation is everywhere and we know ourselves, so if getting married isn’t for you, don’t do it just because other people tell you to do it.
Fidelity is indeed one of the hardest tests of marriage.
4. Extra effort to prove you are worthy enough
When you get married, everything suddenly becomes so serious. You need to give extra effort so that you’ll prove yourself to be worthy of someone’s criteria.
It’s definitely a lot of work.
5. Marriage is a trap of sorts
Marriage is overrated since the list of rules of a married man or woman is so long that you’d feel trapped eventually.
Marriage should make you happy right? However, when you’re married, you’re no longer allowed to see most of your friends because your spouse doesn’t approve them or you can no longer decide on your own since marriage should focus on mutual decisions.
If this makes you feel trapped then you’re not the marrying type.
6. Marriage is a costly affair
One of the truths why people don’t like to marry is that it’s simply expensive. Marrying your partner is indeed expensive and what more, if both of you go on to sign the divorce papers?
That’s as twice as expensive!
7. You don’t need marriage to become parent
You want to have kids – sure!
Most couples today have kids and they don’t get married because for them. The reality is, how you are as a responsible parent is not based on a paper, it’s from your actions and love.
There can be so many married couples who don’t know the real meaning of being a parent.
8. You don’t need marriage to get accomplishments
You can get accomplishments and fulfill your dreams even if you aren’t married. For some, marriage is the start of fulfilling your dreams but it’s not. It is how you work hard and how you compromise that will make sure that you succeed in life.
It doesn’t matter if you are married or not.
9. You don’t need marriage to live with your lover
In the olden days, if you want to start a family and start living together, you need to get married first. That’s not necessarily the case today. You can live together because you’re two grown-ups who are in love.
Marriage isn’t really a license that we need today to live together.
10. Marriage is unpredictable
One of the hardest realities of marriage is that it doesn’t guarantee that you will be together forever. Everything changes and so is the person that you will marry.
Remember that married or not, no one can really predict your future! You can, at best, try.
11. Marriage never guarantees lasting, happy relationships
Lastly, marriage is never a guarantee that you will live a happy life together. There’s no guarantee to life because life is all about change. Marriage will not secure your future nor will it create the perfect life for the both of you.
Marriage is a continuous hard work.
Still want to get married? Remember this!
Marriage is overrated today and the truths behind it aren’t just speculations but rather the real opinions of people. We may all agree with all the benefits of marriage and even the sanctity of it but there are also reasons why some people would rather live together than to marry.
Whatever your reasons are or whatever your choice would be, what really matters here is that you are happy with your choice and that you love your partner, you respect your partner as a person and you are willing to be the best person for the relationship.
Then, even if you’re not married, you’re still in a real relationship.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.