“All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way,” – said Leo Tolstoy.
The same goes for a marriage. All happy marriages somehow look alike, but if you are a part of an unhappy marriage, then only you know the difficulties you have to face each day.
Most marriages start on a happy note. The wedding ceremonies create a cheery ambiance and beckon tons of joyful dreams for the bride and groom for the times to come.
But, unfortunately, in the case of a few weddings, these dreams are shortlived. If a marriage is not cherished and taken good care of, it can turn into an unhappy or loveless marriage for one or both partners.
A marriage is supposed to be the getaway for getting rid of outside problems. Spouses should feel relaxed and happy. However, married people often do things that they don’t realize are wrong, and that will later make their marriage unhappy.
Do you find yourself asking, ‘ Is my marriage over’ of late?
If this is the case, you should be vigilant about the unhappy marriage signs or the signs marriage is in trouble.
So, what are the signs of an unhappy marriage? How do you know if your marriage is worth saving or is over?
Look no further! In this article are given some of the conspicuous unhappy marriage signs.
In some cases, these could be the signs your marriage is over. So, if you happen to notice these unhappy marriage signs in your relationship, it is the time to change your ways for better.
1. Family issues
A great problem for many marriages is a family problem. In many countries of the world, it is typical for the married couple to live in the same house with one of the spouse’s parents.
The lack of individuality and privacy for the young lovebirds can become a significant problem.
Even if there is no such problem, and the couple lives by themselves, the influence of the family can be disastrous for the marriage.
If you observe these unhappy marriage signs, try to find a solution as soon as possible. You can try talking to your parents as well as your spouse, openly and honestly, to find a middle ground for the ongoing issues.
2. Trying to change your partner
Ironically, post-marriage, many people try to change the habits of their partners, which they actually loved while they were in the dating phase. If that is the case, what goes wrong after marriage?
It is after the marriage that the two people actually get to know each other really well. It is because now you are living 24X7 with each other, while earlier, you probably just met for a few hours.
All people want others to think and behave like them. When married, spouses expect the other person to change and become what they think is best.
What they don’t know is that people rarely change, and even more, rarely meet their expectations.
A marriage is much more than two people living together in a union. Both partners silently or arguably agree to fulfill some obligations for the better functioning of that union.
Of course, you love your freedom and are perhaps used to doing certain things in a certain way. But, marriage is a flexible thing, and commitments are not exclusively given to one of the partners.
When one partner needs to do all work without the chance to even ask for help, it is a recipe for a marriage that will soon become unhappy.
If you want these unhappy marriage signs never to swell out in your relationship, you got to incorporate flexibility in your attitude and approach. It doesn’t put you down in a relationship; instead, flexibility in a relationship makes it happy and sustainable.
4. Sexual boredom
Sexual boredom is one of the most common unhappy marriage signs that many couples tend to ignore.
The risk of ignoring this is that at least one of the partners might start looking for someone else outside the marriage to fulfill their needs. Infidelity will definitely make the marriage unhappy. And, you don’t want that to happen in your relationship!
5. Ignoring your spouse
Communication is the basis of all relationships. It is crucial for both partners to talk to each other and even more vital to listen to the other.
There are times when your conversation leads to arguments. But, that doesn’t imply that you should start ignoring your spouse to avoid the conversation altogether.
Ignoring your spouse will lead to putting distance between you and your spouse.
Happy couples know how to listen to each other. It doesn’t mean that they don’t argue. Of course, they do, but they choose to resolve their issues and never ignore them.
After going through these unhappy marriage signs, you might wonder, why do people stay in unhappy relationships.
People get into an unhappy marriage but can’t leave for numerous reasons.
For example, an unhappy marriage with kids is pretty common. People tend to tolerate the unhappy marriage signs, but continue to stay in the drab relationship just for the heck of kids.
So, if you happen to notice the conspicuous unhappy marriage signs in your relationship, you must take quick steps to resolves your issues. You can also choose to seek a counselor’s help or take up a marriage course from the comfort of your home.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action.