Unhappy marriages are more common than you think. Examine the longevity of your marriage by answering the questions below and analyze every word, comment, or action and to try and deduce if yours is going to last or not. Questions such as:
- Why can’t we be happy?
- Why isn’t my significant other like that person?
- Why can’t we be like that couple?
- Can we ever be like that?
If similar questions have been plaguing your mind frequently, then it is important for you to re-evaluate your life and relationship.
It is quite common for couples to stay in a loveless or unhappy marriage without realizing the fact that there is any other way of living. They simply learn to accept the fact that this is how life really is and simply live one day at a time dragging their feet.
You will find that the top unhappy marriage signs are quite surprising because they don’t comply with what most people think.
A lot of people don’t realize that they are in an unhappy marriage
There is an unsettling amount of people who do not recognize their almost-failed marriage as an unhappy one because, for them, an unhappy or loveless marriage can only be because of adultery, infidelity, abuse, addiction, etc. What they understand and believe is that divorce can only occur because of the above-mentioned reasons.
What they do not realize is that any marriage can slowly and gradually turn unhappy if people stop making special efforts.
If couples start taking each other for granted or if people stop caring about the thoughts and feelings of their significant others, then things start to go haywire. This, generally, results in people asking, either themselves or their significant other, ‘How did we get here?’
The one thing that is crucial to strengthen any relationship can be the result of its undoing: intimacy. A complete and unadulterated intimacy is a requirement, but with great power comes great responsibility. When you open yourself in front of the other person and allow yourself to become vulnerable, you are practically handing them the ammunition to destroy you. How they choose to use that ammunition, now that is the question.
Living in denial can be fun, but it will not last forever. Keep your eyes peeled out for the following red flags in order to save yourself from a life of agony and heartache
Here are some top unhappy marriage signs:
1. Lack of physical intimacy
Physical intimacy is the only thing that separates a romantic relationship with all others. If you cannot get physical with your spouse or have not been physically intimate in a while – that is a pretty big red flag to overcome and definitely not a good sign.
2. Being absent-minded when together
Due to a promise made long ago or some other social requirement, your significant other is present with you physically; however, their attention is elsewhere. This is the biggest sign of disrespect one’s partner can show.
3. Your silences are awkward
A true partnership is when the pair can stay comfortably in each other’s silence. They can enjoy the calm moments and be serene about it.
However, when the silence gets heavy and filled with unasked questions or unsaid complains, life hits a dry wall.
4. The dreaded blame game
Life is tough, and everyone does things, at times, that they are not proud of. However, it takes a bigger and emotionally mature person to accept their mistake and to admit when they are in the wrong.
What couples generally do is they start to lag behind because of a reason or two, and they always blame their counterpart for their own behavior. For example, it is their significant other’s fault that they lost their temper – always.
5. There aren’t any fights anymore
As surprising as it sounds, fighting, complaining, or arguing are signs of blossoming love and care. More than half of the people only fight, argue, or complain about their loved ones; people that they really care about.
And as soon as the love starts to fade, the fighting, arguing, and complaining stops.
Word of the wise
Recognizing these top unhappy marriage signs will help you navigate throught the challenges in your relationship.
Regardless of how long it has been, appreciate each other’s presence. Instead of looking for that big gesture, try for the small ones. A flower once a week, an ear at the time of distress, or just a smile or compliment is all it takes to win a heart.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.