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How to Protect Yourself from Unhealthy Relationships

How to Protect Yourself from Unhealthy Relationships

This morning as I prepared my breakfast, I had a boiled egg, two sausage links, and an apple. I inspected the apple, it looked good then I and proceeded to wash then cut it. I ran it through my apple slicer and discovered it was rotten all the way through. I was filled with regret as I watched it get eaten by my garbage disposal. It was such a good-looking apple.  Boy, was I surprised, there was nothing on the outside to indicate that this apple was rotten, no soft spots, no markings and no holes.

It got me to thinking that people are also like this, they look good on the outside or on paper but are rotten to their core. Have you ever met anyone like this? They seem visually appealing to you but after you spend some time with them and pull back the layers they have character flaws you just don’t want to deal with?

We all are imperfect and have character flaws and I am in NO means passing judgment.  There was no way for me to know that Apple was bad until I opened it.  It was easy for me to dispose of that apple but with people, it is not so easy. We develop attachments, through sharing our personal information or bodies.

How to protect yourself

A few steps you can take when selecting a new friend, lover, business partner or life partner.

  •  Just a caution, relationships should be entered into slowly.
  • Take your time and get to know the person, and as you do listen to your inner voice.  Your inner voice will guide you and give you subtle signs if this is the wrong person for you. Spend time talking and observing.  
  • Plan dates that lend towards talking such as walking, visiting museums, zoos, parks, walking trails, etc.
  • Have firm boundaries. Firm boundaries protect you and most importantly protect your heart.

I hope this information is helpful.  My last tip is to remember that relationships offer you the greatest opportunity for learning more about yourself so if the relationship doesn’t work out if gained new information about yourself then count the experience as a win.

  VERIFIED EXPERT
Nicole is a licensed professional counselor in the state of Georgia. She has a private practice located in Atlanta, GA. She specializes in forming healthy relationships, anger management, depression, anxiety, interpersonal deficits and trauma.

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