We all want a successful and happy marriage.We exchange our marriage vows. We promise each other to be there for one another, through thick and thin, through sickness and health, ‘till death do us ‘part. But sometimes the marriage feels like it’s dead far before the actual people do.
For example, if you have white teeth, its because you brush them at least once a day, every day. If you have money, it’s because you go to work at least 5 days/week. If you’re healthy, it’s because you eat right and exercises at least 3 times/week.
When you first start dating, you send your lover cute little texts, you write them cards, you try to learn more about them, you go out for date night at least once a week. After a few years of marriage, most texts you send are “can you take the meat out of the freezer?”. “How much did you withdraw from the bank today?”. After a few years of marriage, writing cards turns into writing cheques. Date night involves sitting in front of the T.V. with a bag of chips, while someone ends up falling asleep.
You see everybody, it’s not time that changes a relationship. It’s your rituals.
To get back the spark in your relationship, check out the video below:
How do you reignite the passion in your relationship?
Do I always have to bring her flowers now? No. Gifts like flowers, chocolate, and fancy date nights are all done to show that you care and that you want to treat them special. You have so many options to show that you care about each other.
Here’s the plan
What’s her favorite movie? What’s her favorite ice cream? Your next date night will be watching her favorite movie, eating her favorite ice cream, and most importantly, putting your hands on each others’ legs during the movie. You’ll also get extra brownie points for paying attention to what she likes. Imagine what will happen that night in bed.
Does he like compliments too?
You bet he does! Guys want to be the King of their Queen. In other words, guys want to feel significant. Every day, when he comes home from work, this is what to do: run up to him, give him a big hug and kiss, and smile at him. I guarantee he will be a lot more friendly, open, and caring with you thanks to this one, fun, ritual.
Shouldn’t I be realistic?
Yes, you should always be realistic. The reality is that these little rituals, when done with true love and excitement send biochemicals through your brain and body. You and your partner will be filled with the happy biochemicals of serotonin and dopamine. He will release more testosterone which is good for his confidence, health, and for your intimate relationship.
Should I tell them about these rituals?
Sure. Figure out a few fun and easy rituals you can do together or for each other. You have a lot of power here to shape your relationship. You go first. Going first will help them feel comfortable to continue the good that you started.
Do looks matter? Doesn’t true love transcend appearance?
Yes, taking care of appearance should be a priority and you should not undermine this crucial marriage tip.
With many years of marriage, followed by kids, it’s easy to slacken when it comes to taking care of appearance. Think about the early days of marriage when you took utmost care of your hygiene and appearance in general.
You don’t have to look like a show stopper every time you settle in for a night of the movie. But don’t transform from being a pretty as a peach or a handsome hunk to an unsightly, lazy and unkempt person.
Pay your spouse the same courtesy by priming yourself up for them.
Build and enjoy relationships outside your marriage
Nurturing your relationship with your spouse and kids is of paramount importance.
But get away with friends are also important.
Sharing anecdotes with others and crafting new experiences makes you a more interesting and enriched person for your spouse to be around. Time apart helps in fostering more romance and affection between the spouses as you need some distance, to nurture other associations in life
Your marriage should be your focal point. But, it should not be the be all and end all. When you follow one of these important marriage tips, you ensure a healthy relationship devoid of any feelings of being stifled.
Follow these marriage tips and continue your efforts to build a relationship that stays strong despite the ebb and flow.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Giovanni is a trained and certified life coach in Toronto. He helps people suffering from problems such as anxiety, depression, addiction, self esteem issues, stress, marital troubles and anger management. He helps his clients understand the root cause of their psychological troubles and supports them in overcoming those troubles. He helps them see their situation in new perspective and move forward with their lives. Click here.