No one doesn’t likes to be showered with love. It becomes more surreal when you are regularly given a premium treat with your love language. For those who are entering a relationship, being treated with love and affection is delightful.
However, some people use this means to emotionally exploit their partner for selfish benefits.
Hence, spotting the signs of love bombing becomes expedient. You should be able to tell if your partner has authentic love for you or they are trying to manipulate you to satisfy their needs.
This piece answers important questions like “what is love bombing?” and other essential pieces of information centered on this theme.
What does Love Bombing mean?
Love bombing is an attempt to emotionally manipulate someone by showing love and affection to change their behavior and actions. It is usually used to win over an individual’s trust and willpower for selfish purposes.
Love bombing is a manipulative strategy that is hard to spot because the recipient would hardly believe that they are being used.
When love bombing is in play, the endorphins and dopamine secretions work overtime. The recipient feels special and valuable, and their self-esteem increases.
However, with time, the recipient notices that their relationship was a figment of their imagination, and their partner did not love them as claimed.
Love bombing in relationships can occur in various ways. For instance, the love bomber can decide to withhold their love and affection from their partner until their wishes are met.
The love bomber can be in love with their partner and display narcissistic attitudes towards them. The love bomber continues to milk their partner of their resources until they are left dry and quit the relationship.
4. Love bombing in marriage
Even among individuals who are married to each other, love bombing exists. The love bomber can decide to deny their partner sexual encounters till their needs are fulfilled.
They can also exploit this path to keep getting things from their partners while claiming to love them.
15 signs that love bombing is in play
It is pretty challenging to recognize love bombing signs because the love and affection they show will keep you distracted. Hence, it is important to be able to differentiate between genuine love and love bombing.
Here are 15 signs of love bombing that tell you if you are love bombed or not.
1. They compliment you out of the blues
It is usual for partners in relationships to compliment each other because it helps to keep the love going. However, if you notice that your partner heaps constant praise and accolades when you’ve done little or nothing to them, they are trying to love bomb you.
If you are not careful, you will agree to their requests without carefully considering them. When you receive unexpected compliments that are beautiful to hear but sometimes uncalled for, you might be love bombed.
These compliments are often harmless and not something you would consider manipulative.
Communication is one of the primary ingredients in a relationship, but it is easy to tell if it is used for selfish reasons, especially one-sided. For example, one of the signs of love bombing is when your partner calls and texts you constantly to check up on you and discuss a little.
If you feel it is becoming overwhelming, your partner might be working on getting something from you, but they try to impress you by keeping up communication.
Love bombing also works more when they know that you love communicating because they will exploit this to their advantage.
If you are in a relationship with someone for the first time, it is easy to notice the signs of love bombing.
For starters, you will observe that your partner wants everything happening to occur fast. They will do several things that are pretty premature for a new relationship. For instance, they can promise never to leave you irrespective of the conflicts that might occur.
They will leave you wondering if you are genuinely in love with them or not. Love bombers in a relationship often like to fantasize.
They begin to draw out plans for the relationship without strategizing on how to keep the relationship solid and healthy.
To know more about love bombing watch this video:
4. They exploit you based on your weakness and insecurities
One of the qualities of narcissist love bombing individuals is how good they are in knowing the deepest and darkest secrets about you.
If you are in a relationship with a love bomber, don’t be surprised when they begin to tell you about your weaknesses that you have not told anyone.
With this knowledge, a sociopath love bombing partner would try to manipulate you. They can use your past mistakes and experiences to make you regretful and depressed.
Also, they will make you feel that you are not good enough so that you will always depend on them for every life’s decision.
5. They show too many romantic gestures
When your partner shows romantic gestures, you will feel special and loved. However, you can begin to tell when it is getting too much and looking suspicious.
When it looks like your partner is willing to go all the way for you, not minding what it would cost them, you might be love bombed.
A love bomber would want to pamper you to the point when you become dependent on them. Therefore, it is important to assess your relationship at this phase to be sure you are not love bombed or not.
6. They accept all your opinions without objection
It might look too good to be true when your partner accepts all your suggestions. This is one of the signs of love bombing that people don’t notice early enough.
The primary reason why your partner avoids rejecting your opinions is that they want to gain your trust.
Therefore, they will keep accepting everything you say till they have you on their side.
Unfortunately, this show of acceptance doesn’t last long because they use this opportunity to manipulate you to fulfill their desires.
7. You get warnings about your partner
It is often said that it is difficult to advise those in love. If you are love-bombed, you would hardly notice because you are swayed by love, affection, and attention. It would be best if you were sensitive to what people around you are saying.
Some of them might be able to recognize your partner’s intentions and toxic behaviors. If you receive similar warnings about your partners, pay more attention to your partner’s behaviors to see if you’ve been manipulated all along or not.
8. Your partner is only nice to you
It is easy to know if someone naturally radiates love by telling how they relate with other people aside from you. One of the signs of love bombing is when you discover your partner does not treat everyone the same way.
You might be surprised to see them treat people harshly except you. Your partner might also be talking about how people around them behave. In your case, he has nothing but nice words for you.
9. They monitor your movements
When a love bomber feels insecure about what you might be doing in their absence, they will praise you before making their inquiries.
They can flatter you with sweet words and compliments before asking you specific questions.
You might not suspect their intentions for asking because you’re basking in the euphoria that someone truly loves and cares for you. If you begin to notice this trend with your partner, it is one of the signs of love bombing.
It is usual for partners to celebrate each other when they achieve a milestone. However, it is easy to tell when one party is more exciting than the celebrant.
One of the signs of love bombing is how an individual celebrates their partner’s success by going overboard.
This might look like the character of a great partner, but it is important to look beyond their intentions. They could be trying to get you on their side so that they can manipulate you when the time comes.
11. They show extreme concern for your life’s decisions
One of the love bombing examples to look out for is when your partner shows too much concern when you make decisions.
When you observe that they continually mirror your interests and decisions to suit theirs, they are love bombing you. It might look like they care genuinely, but it is for their selfish interests.
12. They show your friends and family extra care and attention
A love bomber knows that when they show your loved ones care and attention, you will be pleased and trust them more. Hence, they will try to bond with your loved ones more than you’ve done to prove that they wholly accept your family.
Your friends and family will be able to vouch for them that they are the perfect partner. You need to look beyond face value to tell if they are pretending or not.
13. They spend quality time even before you ask
One of the signs of love bombing is when your partner spends quality time with you beyond normal. For instance, if they have a tight schedule and you request their presence, they will appear almost immediately because they want to impress you.
Be cautious because they might be trying to get on your good side so that you don’t suspect when you are being used.
14. They don’t like it when you put boundaries
Boundaries need to exist in relationships because it helps partners retain their individuality. A love bomber who doesn’t like their partners to set boundaries will get upset and convince their partner that they are being sidelined.
They will try to manipulate their partner to remove those boundaries and let them into their life.
The question “how long does love bombing last?” does not have a definite answer or a particular time frame. Love bombing can continue for a long time if the person being bombed does not realize it.
When a person is love bombed, it is challenging to identify the thin line between authentic and manipulative love. Therefore, an individual can be love-bombed until they realize or someone tells them they are being used.
What can you do if you’re love bombed
Not everyone dares to take a stand when they realize they are love-bombed. However, they can start by setting clear and strict boundaries.
More so, it is essential to communicate with a profound support system like a therapist, family members, or friends to know who your partner is. Also, it would help if you were more concerned about getting help for yourself instead of thinking about the other individual.
The signs of love bombing mentioned in this book help people know if they are being manipulated or not. Love bombing comes with many tactics that leave you confused if you are dating the right person or not.
If you observe that your partner is always on edge to make you happy or get some things done in the relationship, it is possible that love bombing is in play.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action.