A healthy sexual relationship is the basis of every healthy relationship, says psychologist Peg Harley Dawson.
Sexual problems can affect the male ego, and can also cause more emotional damage, such as
anxiety, depression, and loss of self-esteem. Moreover, most men experience their sexual dysfunction as a personal disaster, feel dissatisfaction, anger, depression, and develop chronic worries that the problems will recur.
Simply, a majority of men experience this too personally, as a personal defeat and
proof that they are less valuable. This leads to feelings of less value for men and affects the relationship between partners.
A good sexual relationship provides a sense of happiness for both partners.
American sexual therapists agree on one thing – sex is a multilayered, complex act that can be influenced by many factors. Sexuality is under the influence of many factors, so it’s important to evaluate everything when the problem arises.
We call it biopsychosocial approach.
Indeed, different biological factors can interfere with sexual functioning. Lack of testosterone, blood vessel problems, nerve or spinal cord injury, specificity of the urinary-genital system of a man, arteriosclerosis, diabetes, prostatectomy (surgical removal of the prostate), infections can cause sexual problems. Numerous drugs (antihypertensives, antidepressants, antipsychotics, antacids, etc.) can also lead to sexual problems.
On the other hand, various psychological moments, such as anxiety, depression and chronic stress, also affect sexual functioning. Our relationship with a partner, the way we communicate about sex, but also about other things in life, our attitudes about sexuality (eg guilt, embarrassment, or a sense of satisfaction, a desire for research) can stifle sexual life.
That’s why a conversation between a partner is necessary.
When it comes to problems in sex, the most common sexual problems are –
1. Incompatibility of sexual desires
A gap in sexual desire between partners is one of the most common sexual issues. The cause may be physical, for example, pain during intercourse or chronic fatigue or stress.
However, the two main causes are the sexual and psychological history of the person and the strength of the relationship itself. The problem is also in the strength of sexual desire. One partner can have stronger sexual desire than other.
A solution to this problem depends on numerous problem – what is the root of the problem and what are the potential hidden problems.
2. Health problems
This is the most common case. For example, people with heart diseases avoid sex because of a possible heart attack during sex. Chronic pain can reduce the level the pleasure of having sex. Diabetes and obesity reduce sexual activity.
People who have diabetes usually have erectile dysfunction and fat people avoid sex because of their own perspective about their body. Finally, low level of testosterone, serotonin, dopamine among men as well women can reduce the desire for sex.
Sexual problems are closely correlated with depression.
Most men who are experiencing depression can advocate that their desire for sex is very low or even there is no desire. Moreover drugs that psychiatrist use in the treatment of depression is also “sexual desire killer”.
However, there are several approaches that doctors use in order to improve the sexual life of patients and to maintain the efficiency of therapy.
For example one of the solutions is to replace one therapy that has a negative impact on the sexuality of people with another with a less negative effect. Second solution is to give sexual enhancers which will improve sexual life.
One interesting fact is that anti-depression medicines are used in the treatment of premature ejaculation. This interesting correlation is the consequence of side effects of anti-depression medicines.
However, you should consult with your doctor about using them in therapy.
4. Erectile dysfunction
This disorder can be under influence of many factors – diabetes, injuries (eg spinal cord), side effects of drugs, problems of blood flow to the penis, hormonal disorder, depression, fatigue, alcohol, smoking, psychological causes (eg fear of failure in sex, insecure image of one’s own body) expectations.
Once an erection problem occurs, a man can enter the vicious circle, and this problem is maintained because of the fear that he will repeat, i.e. a man enters into a sexual relationship with the fear of losing an erection again.
Since stimulation is less than usual because it is directed to an erection, and not to satisfaction, the erection is lost, and its fear is exacerbated.
The possibilities of treating erectile dysfunction are numerous. Certain life habits can improve the erectile function: physical activity, smoking cessation, lowering alcohol intake, and losing weight.
Psychosexual therapy is also conducted with a partner, which the main goal is on reducing fear and anxiety from loss of erection.
The partners work together on touching exercises, designed to connect the man physically to his partner without any pressure to have a sexual relationship. Those who do not have partners have a bigger challenge ahead.
Men can be shown exercises to work during masturbation in order to become more confident and easily regain erection if a loss occurs during sex. There is also the possibility of treating injections that are administered to the penis or gel.