Life after children can lead to a lack of time alone. It can be very difficult for couples to transition into parenthood while still being present and intimate within their relationship.
It becomes increasingly difficult to find the time and money for date nights, and romantic getaways. The stress of day to day life increases, and can have a huge impact on a couple’s relationship.
Intimacy does not just mean sex, it refers to the moments of reconnection. The more connected, and intimate a relationship is the more comfortable we are, and most likely it will lead to a more active sex life. There are a number of ways to keep intimacy alive while being a parent.
As you are walking past each other in the hall, or around each other in the kitchen. You have these moments throughout the day where you can reach out and just touch each other.
Run your fingers along his or her back, or across his or her arm. These small touches keep that passion and intimacy burning throughout the day.
These do not need to be large displays of public affection, but a just a small touch that reminds your partner that you are attracted to them.
2. Text messages or little notes
A quick message to say you love each other or something you love about the other. Text messages through the day make for a great way to stay connected.
We all have 30 seconds to send a quick note, be it loving or naughty. These messages just remind your partner you are thinking about them.
Another is to leave notes behind so they can find it during their day. These little surprises can make a huge difference in your spouse’s day.
You walk through the door and everyone wants something. That being said, if you take a minute just for yourselves as a couple when you return home it can make a big difference.
No child will get hurt, no fire will start if you take one minute to reconnect. To have a proper kiss.
This not only reminds your spouse and you the importance of your relationship, but also models to your children what a healthy relationship looks like.
4. Eye contact
Stopping and just making eye contact with your partner can make a moment of connection.
Amongst the chaos of the family, you can take a moment to catch your partner’s eyes and hold the gaze for 30 seconds. This small gesture will give you that moment of connection.
5. Screen-free evenings
Date nights are great, but as a parent, they are not always attainable.
Having a screen-free evening once your children are in bed is an easy, cheap way to have some time as a couple.
It can be playing board games, just sitting and talking, or looking at the stars together. These nights allow for the distractions to go away and time just for you as a couple.
6. Early Bedtimes
Laying in bed before you sleep can be a great place to talk, and reconnect.
Going to bed with no technology before you are exhausted allows you as a couple to spend some time just catching up.
It is a natural place to cuddle and just be together.
Following these tips will not interfere with your parenting regime yet will give you ample opportunity to reconnect and grow the intimacy between you and your partner.