It’s as if you are releasing the burden of judgment. Things begin to flow and you will be able to feel happiness instead of anger.
I am not telling you not to keep your boundaries with family members who may try to cross your boundaries.
I am simply telling you that if you see them with the lens of acceptance instead of judgment, you will begin to feel better.
For example, let’s say you have an aunt who you only see at the holidays.
Every year she asks you the same questions to which every year you have the same answers. She is also very loud. This drives you mad and surviving the holidays difficult by manifold.
Instead of letting it drive you mad just allow yourself to accept the fact that this how she behaves, be glad it’s not you.
Accept it and move on.
Normally changing the way we think takes time and practice, however, it’s just a few hours during the holidays so I think it is doable. It’s not really biting your tongue either, it’s changing your perspective.
Gratitude changes your perspective almost immediately. Surviving the holidays can surely become easier if you start practicing gratitude, consciously and more often.
If you begin to get upset in any way during this holiday season take a few deep breaths and start to list all of the things you are grateful for.
You will be amazed how quickly you begin to feel calmer and almost energized as the positive thoughts begin to flow.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Kirsten Louise Cantley is a Holistic Psychotherapist and has a private practice in Greenville, South Carolina. She offers in-office sessions for counseling and coaching as well as Telehealth and is able to see clients from all over the world. She received her Masters from Northwestern University, Evanston, IL.
Ms. Cantley is Psychodynamically trained and then incorperates a Holistic approach; focusing on not only the mind but the body and spirit. You cannot have a healthy mind without a healthy body and spirit.
Marriages can be delicious & lovely. The grass is not always greener. Pre-marriage, marriage & divorce (the new chapter: healing & how do I want to design my life next?)