It is often hard to understand how a couple can jump from ‘together till we die’ to ‘ we are not working out’ all of a sudden.
Perhaps, that is because it is not really what it seems like; a bond so strong does not break away in a matter of seconds, but it is, in fact, an outcome of certain things that go by unnoticed when the couple is together.
Indeed, the signs of destruction are sometimes surprising and sneaky. However, when observed carefully we can surely identify them out, and even seek professional guidance with regard to them.
Here are the top 6 alarming signs that tend to indicate that the odds may not be in favor of you
Keeping in mind that every couple is distinct and every relationship has its own set of dynamics, these signs may not indicate the occurrence of divorce for everyone.
However, it is still encouraged that you take notice of them, and work to fix them as it is better to take caution before casualties.
1. You speak but do not communicate
Communication is not only about simply speaking. Perhaps, that is something you do every day with everyone.
But when it comes to your partner, it does not have to be like this. In a marriage exchanging little words, a day may create distance between you and your spouse. Such behavior, when exhibited, tends to weaken the affection and love you share.
It may even make one of you suffer emotionally as it is not easy to have your partner be so close yet so away from you.
Thus, it is very important for couples to understand this that communication is different. It is about listening and understanding your spouse that develops a mutual affection. It is about listening to their inner voice. From sharing your secrets with them to laughing and crying together; it all in a way is ‘communication.’
2. Prolonged fights and arguments
Fighting or having disagreements with your spouse is totally a normal thing to happen.
However, what is not normal is the fights and arguments lingering in between the both of you for days. This usually happens as people tend to drag in their ego. Know this pals, being egoistic is a toxic trait. It poisons your married life, rendering it incapable of blossoming.
It may even happen due to some lingering grudges that you have against your spouse, or maybe they do. Thus, it is always encouraged to talk and sort things out with your partner peacefully and immediately. It might seem hard, but it is surely worth it!
3. Disagreements on when to start a family
Couples often call it quits as they do not see themselves on the same page when it comes to kids. This is a major sign that if not resolved may lead to the separation of you and your husband or wife.
Therefore, make sure to talk the matter out with your partner simply. If it is them who do not want kids, ask them and try to understand their reasons; maybe they need a little time to take responsibility as big as this on their shoulders.
While if it is you who puts down this wish of your partner, try reconsidering your decision or simply discuss with your husband/ wife and try reaching an amicable solution.
4. Lack of consistency
A lack of consistency weakens the foundation of your married life.
This is because it makes the heart and mind of your partner a haven for doubts about your feelings for them. If one makes their spouse feel everything at the moment, and nothing the next; it will surely disturb them emotionally.
And indeed everyone has a breaking point where they no longer can bear much anymore- the point where they demand a divorce.
5. Lack of intimacy
Missing out on those intimate moments can slowly erode your marriage, as where it strikes hard is the foundation of your married life.
Not being intimate with your partner can make you both drift away to the point where you or your spouse or even both may no longer feel attracted to each other.
This can even create communication issues.
6. Lack of respect for one another
Disrespecting anyone is a very non-ethical behavior, and surely something not to be demonstrated for a special loved one.
In a marriage, disrespectful behavior is a huge concern, and over the years has to lead to the separation of couples that were seen as unbreakable. Therefore, respect your spouse, and make them respect you.
It shall not only save your marriage from breaking apart but will help you build a strong, mutual understanding and affection.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.